#barely acknowledged by joe. because again. why would he. he is a god they are ants etc etc (mean but that's the normal dynamic!)

[cementcornfield]

not lance reposting the joe doing the griddy video on HIS story with a bunch of laughing emojis!

[writingsbychlo]

let it snow | joel dawson

word count; 20,746

summary; the night is made for doing things you probably shouldn’t do, and the mornings are for running away from them. except, for when you’re snowed in, and trapped with your problems for who knows how long.

notes; this is based vaguely on the movie ‘two night stand’, but very loosely, it does not follow much of the idea at all, just the basic outline. you absolutely do not have to have seen the movie to read this.

warnings; smut, reference to unprotected sex, very light (accidental) slut shaming, that’s about it.

It took you a moment to realise that you weren’t in your own bed when you woke up, startling a little as you came to the realisation. Your walls were not painted blue, and you definitely didn’t have a desk that messy pressed up underneath the window. In fact, your bedroom didn’t have a view like that at all, your bedroom window looked straight out into New York city, and the alleyways behind some dodgy fast-food restaurants.

This was a nice view, calmer roads and little houses, fields sprinkled with snow became visible the more you sat up, and you hadn't remembered it snowing this heavily last night. Sure, you’d been rather preoccupied, and okay, maybe it had been snowing a little bit, but this looked excessive. Although, it would explain the deep chill in the air right now.

You were still a little foggy, jumping slightly as hot breath washed over you from behind the bedding pulling as another body shuffled, and you were stiff all over. Then, it hit you. Reckless, a few drinks in with your happily loved up roommate and her boyfriend, who made you feel more and more painfully single every time you saw them, before you’d retreated to your bedroom, tipsy and secretly bitter, and checked some dating websites. A cute guy, some witty jokes, a funny conversation, and then him.

Everywhere, all at once, a quick train ride and some frantic kisses, your clothes being stripped from your body as that same mouth moved lower and lower, sweaty and hot and barely stopping to ask questions before you were waking up now, a little bit panicked and filled with ridiculous regret. Rubbing a hand over your eyes, you forced yourself to roll over, as calmly as you possibly could, to try and take in the sleeping man beside you.

Messy brown hair, the same shade as dark chocolate, your tongue tingling at the thought of the sweet treat as you liked your lips, resisting the urge to reach out and see if the stands were as soft as they looked. His face was half-hidden within the pillow, slumped down into it, but pale skin reflected little brown moles, his hair beginning to speckle with a light tracing of stubble, the tingle of which was now beginning to make itself known again between your thighs. Long eyelashes on closed lids hid his eyes from you, but you had a distinct memory of them, burned into your mind.

Warm pools of amber and gold, swirling browns that glittered in the low light that had taken over, like flickering candles and pools of caramel, a shade of whiskey that you wanted to be drunk on, beautiful and bright from all the times he’d looked at you. He was handsome, you couldn’t deny that, an odd surge of pride rushing through you as you congratulated yourself on at least being able to pick out somebody physically perfect to have a one-night stand with in your self-pitying loath.

The blankets were sitting around his middle, one hand stretched out a little towards your side of the bed, long and veiny fingers, and you remembered a little just why he’d driven you so wild now, those same veins making tracks up his forearms, disappearing just before his biceps. He was toned, but not overly so, the muscles along his chest standing out, a smattering of dark hair between them, and you could finally remember tracing the slight definition of abs with your tongue, before you’d been tracing something else, and your face flushed with heat as you remembered just how much of the man before you you’d seen.

It felt scandalous now, to be sharing abed with a stranger whom you could barely remember, and to know exactly what he looked like naked, or how he sounded while moaning as he came, but to not even know his last name, or to fully remember the address that you were even at. It was dirty, it was filthy, it was wrong. Oh, but it had been so fun, an experience that everybody should have at least once in their life, a naughty little secret, the one night stand you picked up at a bar, or through a friend, someone you’d look back on fondly once you were ten years older, married and settling down, and as you thought about it more, your lips were still flicking up in a smile.

You’d laugh about it one day.

Slipping from the covers, you tried to find your clothes, not wanting to linger any longer, not wanting the awkwardness of having to deal with stunted small-talk and forced politeness as you tried to adjust to the morning alongside him, someone who was still a little fuzzy in your mind, and your clothes were scattered around the room within easy access, a fortunate happening that made you thank whichever god or deity might be watching you right now.

Sipping your jeans back on, you wiggled a little, trying not to make the flooring creak underneath you, and only pausing long rough to put on your socks, shoes held in hand as you adjust your jumper on your body, a hand running through messy hair to tame it. The man shuffled, and you froze, watching as he paused for only a moment, before flipping over and away from the side you’d been sleeping on, a sleepy huff sounding from him, but he was still snoozing heavily, and you let out a little sigh. Your coat was hanging on the rack, and you grabbed that too, anticipating ho grateful you’d be to have it as you battled against the freezing cold that was surrounding you, toes chilling more and more against the concrete, but you didn’t want to wait much longer to leave.

A scrap of paper, a post-it note from the pad in the hall and a pen that barely had any ink left in, but you scribbled down a few quick words, pinning it up to the corkboard beside the door, and nodding to yourself as you deemed it good enough.

‘had a great time last night, thx.’

With a smiley face and a sign on your name to finish it off, you were undoing the catch across the door, the chain rattling slightly as it fell loose, and you winced, waiting to see if you’d woken him again, the studio apartment he resided within offering little in the way of walls and doors to muffle the muted noises of your escape. When you deemed it clear, your hand sealed around the door handle, clicking it open carefully, and pulling the door towards yourself.

So close, the corridor in sight, but the alarm beeped loudly, and you jumped, the computerised voice startling you so violently that your whole body jerked a little, and you went wide-eyed. You closed the door, hoping it would stop, but the beeping only intensified, and your heart raced in your chest.

“Shit!” Your voice was hissed out in a whisper, and you panicked, hearing the man in bed begin to stir a little, and in a last-minute bid to try and reclaim what little dignity you had left, not wanting to be caught sneaking out, you tore the note back down from the pin-board crinkling it slightly and tiptoeing back to the bedroom. Placing your shoes and coat down quietly as the man began to surface, and you tucked yourself back under the covers on the opposite side, pulling them up to your neck and faking a yawn as he pushed himself up with a groan, sleep broken.

He wandered away from you, your eyes diverting from his body a little bit as the covers fell away, and you were grateful to find that at some point he’d pulled his boxers back on, because you weren’t sure you could handle any more embarrassment this morning. The beeping came to a stop, a mechanic voice informing you that the alarm had been rest, and he was rubbing at his face and yawning as he wandered back through.

“False alarm.”  His voice was still raspy, filled with sleep and cracking a little.

“That’s so weird.” He only hummed in acknowledgement of your words, before he was shaking himself down, settling back into the bed and rolling onto his side, away from you as he fell right back into his slumber, and you sat up. “Bummer that it woke us up. I should probably get going anyway. I had fun, though!”

“Thanks, I think.” He was still half-asleep, barely processing your words, you picked at the sheets a little, trying to decide whether or not you were sufficiently polite enough to be able to leave yet.

“It was perfect for.. y’know.. what I needed. So, thanks, Joe.”

“Joel.” He mumbled, your brows furrowing as your legs swung over the edge of the bed, feet hitting the floor, and a loud creak sounded out under your sudden weight on the floorboards.

“What?” He huffed, deciding that sleep clearly wasn’t a luxury he was going to reclaim, and he pushed himself to sit up, pillows popped behind him.

“My name, it’s Joel.”

“What did I say?” Your fingers were doing up your laces, ignoring the burning heat of his gaze on you.

“Joe. My name has a little ‘L’ at the end. Joel.”

“Right, yeah, my bad.” You cringed a little, picking up your coat from the floor, and pulling it up your arms, an amused look on his face as he watched you.

“Did you sleep fully dressed?”

You looked down, shrugging a little and swallowing thickly as this got more and more awkward, and this wasn’t exactly how you’d pictured the morning after your first one night stand going. “I, uh, got cold.”

“Uh-huh.” You patted your hand at your sides, not sure what else to do, and he stretched his arms out, rolling his head from side to side, before looking at you again. “So, do you want to get some breakfast? Or do you normally just take off?”

“Normally?” He paused his stretching, looking up at you, a confused expression flicking across handsome features, and he made a vaguely confused noise, as though he didn’t know what he’d just spoken. “You said ‘normally’. Like, as if I do this so often that I’d have a normal and abnormal version of it.”

“That’s not what I meant. I have no idea how often you do this, I just thou-”

“I told you last night that this was my first time doing this, or even anything remotely like this!” You remembered that part clearly, because you choked a little on your words when telling him, and then he’d laughed breathlessly and kissed you, while pushing you back into his bed, and your face flushed as you remembered the exact moment, graphic detail almost disturbing.

“Yeah, but, c’mon.” You raised your brows at him, hands sitting on your hips as you stared at him, hoping your face portrayed the fact that you absolutely did not know. “(Y/N), c’mon. Do you really expect me to believe that this is your first one night stand, ever?”

“Yes! Because it is!” He stared at you blankly, before shrugging a little, seeming to accept it, but you were still feeling distinctly judged. “The only reason I’m even here is that my roommate and best friend had her boyfriend over, and I was feeling particularly lonely in the holidays, and they were, y’know, about to.. so, I had to do something, an-”

“No, yeah, you were sexiled, or whatever. I remember that. It’s just, surely this isn’t the first time your roommate has wanted to sleep with her boyfriend while you were home, so this can’t be the first time you’ve.. yeah.” He waved his hands, motioning between the two of you, and your arms crossed over your chest, glaring at him.

“I am sensing some distinctly judgy vibes coming from your side of the bed - which is odd, considering what we did took teamwork - and I haven’t even done anything worth judging!”

“There’s no judgy vibes coming from this side of the bed!” He laughed a little, shaking his head incredulously at you, and had your anger not been reaching its peak, you probably would have been a little more embarrassed. “Honestly, I really admire what you did. I wish more girls were that forward.”

“Forward?” You seethed, rolling your eyes at him. “There we go with that ‘slut’ thing again!”

“Wha- what ‘slut thing’? I’m not calling you a slut!” He moved now, standing up himself from the bed and you averted your eyes, letting him scoop up his shirt from the floor and tug it on over his head. “I’m calling you a girl, who went over to a stranger’s house at midnight. If only there was a word for that.”

“You know what, screw you!”

“That was a joke.” You stormed past him, hearing him chase after you with his own laughs as he tried to suppress them. “That was a joke! I’m sorry, bad timing.”

“You invited me here, just remember that!”

“That’s not quite how it happened, but it doesn’t matter.” He was biting at the inside of his cheek to contain his smile, fixing you with an amused gaze. “Look, why don’t we just have some breakfast? I make really good oatmeal, with a little smiley face made out of jam.” He almost had you, your resolve breaking just a little, before he was snickering to himself again. “And it’s not slutty at all.”

“Save your stupid oatmeal, I think I’m just going to take off.” You swung the door open, a bitter smile on your face as you looked back at him. “Thanks for having me, it was just awesome getting to know you. Have a great life, Joe.”

“Okay, cool, well, I’m just going to assume you did it on purpose that time, because I already told you a bunch of times that it’s Joel with an ‘L’.”

“It wasn’t, but don’t worry, you just have a stupid name!”

“Great.” He huffed, no amusement left in him as he stared at you with frustration. “Well, ‘bye! Lovely having sex with you!”

“Wish I could say the same!” You hissed, his jaw dropping a little, before his eyes were narrowing.

“Sounded like you had a pretty good time last night.”

“Don’t believe everything you hear.” You were prideful and mean, and you’d probably feel bad about it later but right now it was the only way you were getting through this disaster of a morning. “Especially when it’s something like ‘Hey, Joel - cool name.’ Like, what is that? Sounds like the first draft of a name!”

“Okay. Fuck you, (Y/N).”

“Fuck you, back!”

It was a weak ending to the argument, but you didn’t care, the door slamming behind you as you stormed away, quick to hold your coat closer to your body as the temperature between the apartment on the halls was radically different, your breath clouding in the air even from within the building, and you located the staircase.

It was only four floors up, the building being rather oddly constructed, only two apartments per floor, and it was unusually quiet behind all of the doors. When you finally reached the main entrance, remembering him coming downstairs to let you in last night, you undid the catch, your shoulder pushing against the fogged up glass as you made to leave, and a confused and slightly pained cry sounded from you as the door refused to budge even an inch.

You tried again, before you were wiping at the glass, to clear the condensation and try and see what the blockage was, but you quickly discovered it wasn’t fog but ice. Moving over to the window beside a door labelled ‘laundry’, you were met with the sight of snow piled up high, almost three feet up to reach the base of the window, and the roads weren’t even visible. You hadn't realised just how heavy the snow had gotten, and how bad the extent of it all was, until now, where you could see the

“Oh, no, no, no.” Panic flooded through your system as you realised just how screwed you were, trapped in a building with no way out, and your phone was dying, and you weren’t even sure whether your roommate would be up in time to come and find you and clear the snow before the battery died. “You have got to be fucking kidding me.”

Pulling up google, you were quick to check the news reports in the area, finding that the snow had increased and come down heavily overnight, it was a city-wide issue, and there was no way that they’d be getting anywhere near where you were for hours, if that. It was still snowing, albeit not as heavily, but they were prioritising inner-city roads and train lines, not little apartment blocks on the edges of cute fields and open space.

Of all the people you could choose to hook up with, you had to pick the person who was living in the most inconvenient location for a snowstorm.

Glancing around, you realised this was it, you were just going to have to hunker down for a few hours, and in all fairness, it could be worse. At least it was clean and smelled pleasant. Settling yourself down against the cool concrete flooring in the edge of the room, you stretched your legs out before yourself, daring to tap the ‘call’ button on your phone, and bringing it to your ear.

You waited, listening to it ring all the way until it went to voicemail, and then again, and again. After three times, and a whole 5% of what little battery life you had left remaining, you gave up on your roommate, knowing that if it were you at home, you’d be snuggled up cosy in your bed and still fast-asleep too. Switching the device off to conserve power, your head fell back, resting on the wall. Most wonderful time of the year, my ass.

“No, it was super fuckin’ weird. Totally fine, and then suddenly everything is a screaming match an-”

You cursed under your breath, the one voice you had wished you wouldn't have to hear again, followed by rhythmic bouncing of footsteps coming down the stairs, and you glanced up, offering a small wave to the person whom you’d hoped never to have to see again, and his brows furrowed, pausing where he was stood.

“I’m gonna’ have to call you back.” Tucking his phone into his pocket, he took the final few stairs slowly, coming to stand before you, and you pushed yourself up from the floor, brushing the dust from your pants. “What are you still doing here?”

“Blizzard. A whole bunch of snow piled up and now the door won’t open.”

He turned back to look at it, adjusting the basket in his arm before placing it down on the floor, and moving over to the door. Your arms crossed over your chest as he did, watching as he pushed the barred handle down, shoulder ramming into the door, and a grunt left him as it refused to move. He tried it again, before rubbing at his arm lightly, and moving away to peer out of the window just like you did, a little shocked at just how much it was, and you rolled your eyes at him. “I told you.”

“I was just trying to help, there was no need to be rude.” He muttered, and you scoffed once again, turning away from him as he picked the basket back up. He wandered away from you, into the laundry room, disappearing from sight, and you sat back down on the floor.

You heard him test the taps, water still coming through them miraculously, the metal and water within not having completely frozen over, and you brought your legs up to your chest, arms crossing over your knees and chin balancing atop them, preparing yourself for a long while of being bored. It was after many clicks and dials, the soft beeping of the machines as they rumbled to life, that you heard him appear once again, dirty Adidas scraping against the floor, before he came to a stop in front of you.

He looked at you for a minute, seeming to analyse whatever thoughts were going through his head, and you raised a single brow at him, prompting him to speak sooner rather than later. “You can come back upstairs, if you want.” You stared at him for a further minute, jaw dropping a little, and he tucked the laundry stock under his arm. “It’s going to be hours until those roads are cleared, even if they do unblock the doorway. You’ll freeze down here, and you haven’t eaten anything. I’ll make you some breakfast.”

He offered his hand, and sliding your palm against his, he pulled you up from your position on the floor, dropping your hand and spinning on his heel to guide you back up to his apartment. It was awkward, to say the least, and you rubbed your hands together to try and warm them back up, the chill in the air beginning to seep into your clothing and cool you to the core.

When the door opened back up, you let out a little groan, wishing you’d suppressed it better but being caught off guard, and you heard the man before you huff a laugh as your eyes scanned over the small space heater that was set up in the corner, warmth radiating from it and spreading across the apartment. Hanging your coat back up on the hooks by the door, you shuffled through the apartment, not too sure what you should be doing now that you’d returned to the scene of the crime from which you’d fled.

You chose to simply follow what Joel was doing, repeating his name like a mantra in your head so that you didn’t mess it up again, and taking a seat at the round table with a few mismatching chairs around it within his kitchen, watching as he clattered about with pots and pans at the stove. You busied yourself with your phone, finding that you at least had a signal, and could access your social media.

Instagram and snapchat were filled with videos and photographs of the snow, taken aesthetically from the windows, roofs and balconies of people who were lucky enough to be in their own homes, curled up with steaming mugs of tea and the loves of their lives to take pictures from behind frosted glass of the winter wonderland that was more like the bane of your existence.

You replied to a few texts, and messaged your friend again to update her, leaving it there for her to read whenever she came back around to consciousness, to tell her that she didn’t need to rush, and that you’d at least found yourself somewhere to keep warm and safe. Your head snapped up when a steaming bowl of oatmeal was paced down before you, smelling delicious with maple syrup and fruit, a spoon clattering down beside it before the scraping of the chair opposite you was ringing in your ears.

Poking at it, you couldn't help but notice the smiley face sitting on top, the syrup beginning to sink in as the blueberries scattered over the top were almost half-submerged, looking a little wonky but still adorable, and you looked up at the man who was already tucking into his own, finding him staring at his own meal in silence.

“Smiley face.”

Your voice cracked a little with your whispered words, but his eyes met yours, pausing only a second before the edges of his lips were flicking up in a gesture of a smile, and one shoulder rose and fell in a weak shrug. “Told you I would.”

You only nodded, spoon stirring at the contents of the dish, mixing it all together and the face on the porridge disappeared as you blended the flavours, before lifting a heaped spoonful to your mouth. Blowing on it carefully, you took the mouthful between your lips, this time successful in holding in your little sounds of appreciation as the food hit your tongue. It was delicious, you couldn't deny that, warm and satisfying as you tried to fight off the cold that was still threatening to creep in.

It wasn’t that you hadn't worn suitable clothing, but you’d only worn a camisole and jumper with a pair of leggings that were undoubtedly on the thinner side, because warm clothing hadn't been your main concern the night before when they were only going to be peeled from your body an hour or so later, discarded to the floor. Now, you were deeply regretting that decision.

You also hadn't realised how hungry you’d been, because the headache that had been forming, throbbing behind your eyes with a dull ache, was beginning to recede, the anger that had been dwelling within your system was fading, and you were allowing your mind to replace it with guilt instead. You’d been a little crass this morning, yelling and lashing out at Joel when it had been your fault that you felt like shit, succumbing to the sensual temptations of nightfall and your loneliness, and blaming your decisions on everyone else when the sun had risen.

“Look, we’re going to be here a while.” You jumped, spoon clanging against the edge of your dish, and Joel tried - and failed - to bite back his smirk at the amusement of having scared you out of your thoughts. “Why don’t we just pretend like last night never happened? Start over again? You can stay on one side of the apartment, I’ll stay on mine, we don’t even really have to interact. We’ll just coexist until the snow is cleared, and then we can part ways and never meet again. Sound cool?”

You let out a breathy sound of amusement, nodding your head as relief flooded your system. “Works for me. Clean slate?”

“Great.” He nodded, that flickering look of amusement passing over his face again, and he reached a hand out across the table. “Hey, I’m Joel. Your roommate for the next couple of hours.”

You paused, letting out a sigh as he arched his eyebrows in a silent question as to whether you were going to leave him hanging, before you accepted the outstretched hand and shook it. Giving him your name in return, he nodded his head, before he was standing up, and taking both of your bowls away to the sink, dumping them into the soapy water that he’d already prepared so that they could begin to soak.

Crossing your legs under the table, and your nails tapped for a second, silence filling the room for a few minutes, and you desperately searched for something to say that you could use to fill the silence. “Do you want to watch a movie?”

His voice sounded almost as strained as your own, but you let out a little sigh at the fact that at least he’d broken the tense silence between you both, and you hummed. “Yeah, that's good with me. Do you have a phone charger I can use?”

He turned to look at you over his shoulder, hands still submerged within the sink, but you waved the device at him as he took it in. “Yeah, I’ll grab it. You can go and pick a film; remote is around there somewhere. Pick something good.”

You were more than eager to get away from sitting idly at the table in awkward quiet and waiting for the hours to pass, each tortuous minute making you wish you’d just remained downstairs alone, slowly freezing into a statue. The couch was large and plush, slightly worn seats but it only made it look more inviting, a plethora of cushions and pillows laid out for you to settle into, and just as he’d said, the controls were already out on the coffee table, a few coasters and random pieces of stationary covering the surface too.

Switching the television on, you waited for it to boot up, finding that he had netflix downloaded, and there was a list of films in the back of your mind that you’d been waiting to watch, and you flickered through them all as you stared at the screen. Narrowing it down, you felt like a comedy might be a good choice, lighten the air with something easy going and funny, nothing too intense, and the couch dipped at the very opposite end as your company sat as far away as he could, leaning against the other arm of the couch but dropping his phone charger down onto the space between, an olive branch extended in the form of a tangled phone wire.

“How about ‘Jumanji’?”

“Good film.” He mumbled, and you nibble don your lower lip, before he was letting out the breath he was holding and turning towards you. “Second one is on here too, we could watch them both. I haven’t seen that one, just the first.”

“It’s a plan.” You confirmed, clicking play on the movie and crossing your legs, leaning over the side of the couch to try and locate a socket, pushing the plug into the wall, and hooking your phone up the power, the device buzzing in your hand as it began to charge up.

Dwayne Johnson and Kevin Hart were an entertaining pair on screen, and as the group began to navigate through the jungle, you let yourself become immersed in what you were seeing on screen. It wasn’t all that hard, because Jack black was hilarious. The occasional echo of a laugh from one or both of you would crack the silence when something happened, and the picking of loose threads on your jumper had begun to stop as you settled a little more into the situation, your anxiety settling and not needing to be quite so stiff.

When there were only twenty minutes or so until the end of the first movie, your phone buzzed, and then again, a series of rapidly incoming texts, and flipping over the device, it was revealed to you as your friend. Swiping it open, you pulled up the texts, chuckling to yourself at the frantic collection of broken messages that she had sent to you.

[soph 🌹] only just woke up, so sorry!!

[soph 🌹] just checked news, no way to get to u!!

[soph 🌹] roads all blocked, wtf, when did this snow come down??

[soph 🌹] kinda funny tho.

[soph 🌹] only u would go for a hookup and get snowed in there.

[soph 🌹] is he at least hot? tap that again. fill the day with hot sex??

You scoffed, but your lips were forming a smile, and you could feel the glances that were being cast your way every couple of seconds, choosing to glance up and return the look as he turned to face you once again.

“My friend just woke up, she’s finally learning about the snow.”

“Did she know you were still, um..” He scratched at the back of his neck, other hand casting around the apartment. “-out?”

Heat flushed your own cheeks, before you were nodding your head, and he seemed or accept that, silence forming between you both once again as he turned to look back at the TV screen, but stretching out with a little more comfort, long legs crossing at the ankles from where they were extended before him, and he lounged back a little more.

> that’s definitely not going to happen.

You were only given a moment of reprieve, before your phone was chiming again.

[soph 🌹] why not!! not like you’ve got anything else to do

> probably bc we're not exactly getting along. civil at best.

She didn’t respond after that, leaving your message on read, and you assumed that she’d become preoccupied with the man you guessed would have spent the night there with her, and once again, you were envious of her for being at home and comfortable in her own space, when instead, you felt like you were walking on eggshells.

The majority of the second movie was spent more on taking in the details of the apartment around you, instead of the plot line and characters. Posters hung up on the walls, and you wondered how he could afford to live here, the place was nice, but there was nothing here that suggested another person lived in the apartment, but there was no way a college student could afford a place like this alone, unless his parents were paying for it. It was a nice area, the kind of place you could live with if you had kids or were elderly, and you were pretty sure on your way over here the night before that you’d seen someone walking a dog, making it the picture-perfect neighbourhood.

College textbooks and stationery were around, a stack of notebooks and text printouts sitting on the little table before you, and it was almost fifteen minutes before you built up the confidence to lean forward and take them all in with a little more detail. He watched as you went, your eyes moving to meet his as you waited for permission, but he never stopped you, so you picked up the first book that was on top.

‘Art within Literature: The Importance of Illustrations’

“Didn’t have you pegged for an art kinda’ guy.” You mumbled, and you heard him chuckle, before he was sitting up a little straighter, moving across the couch closer to you just slightly, to see which one you had picked up.

“Not the first time I’ve been told that, actually.” He grabbed at the controls, your eyes flickering up to the screen as the sound of the movie cut off, replaced by the boring drone of the local news station, but right now, it may as well have been the most important thing in the world as the two of you perked up to listen. Placing the book back down, your legs folded underneath yourself, and you secretly had your hopes up that they were going to be getting around to this end of the city soon.

It took a while, the list of places that were being cleared was working out from the inner city in circles, your hopes falling more and more and you listened, getting an update on the weather about how it was expected to be even colder tonight than it had been last night, and the snowfall wasn’t expected to stop anytime soon, but instead, you would be here even longer than expected. The earliest that there were any plans for the road to be cleared in this area was tomorrow morning, and sadness was once again spiking within your system, feeling the man beside you sag with just as much disappointment.

“Guess I’ll set the couch up for you, later.”

“Thanks.” You hoped your lack of enthusiasm didn’t show in your voice, because you truly were grateful, and he stood up, wandering away to his bedroom and grabbing the plastic woven basket he’d been using earlier as he went, presumably to start up another load of laundry. When the door to the apartment closed behind him, you were left in silence once again, and you turned down the volume and picked up the next book that had been on his pile.

This one was a sketchbook, that much was clear as soon as you opened the book, and his full name was written across the front page, information on how to return it if it came up lost followed it, smudged fingerprints from graphite and coloured chalks were also along the corners. Flipping the first page, you were caught a little off-guard by the image you saw, yet not entirely surprised.

Clearly, his passions lay with fiction and fantasy, the name of what you assumed to be some kind of ancient Greek novel, much like ‘Iliad’ or ‘The Odyssey’, because a range of different creatures and monsters were scattered across the pages beautiful drawings, incredible details and shading, and you’d never seen anything quite like them. You wanted to trace your fingers over them, but resisted in fear of ruining the delicate art, and flicked through the pages instead.

At the top of some pages the book titles changed, inspirations from different famous works, some you knew and some you didn’t, but the drawings were always perfect. When you reached the final page, you placed it down, guilt once again running through your veins as you remembered the way you’d snapped at him this morning, because the more you learned about him, the more you realised he wasn’t all that bad, and he was probably a pretty decent guy, if you’d just given him the chance to be.

Getting up from the couch, an idea was forming in your mind, a way to at least try to pay him back or make your appreciation known, and you found yourself again in his kitchen, hands on the cupboard doors as you began to look through them.

They were mostly empty, not much in place but enough to make it work, you were sure of it, you could whip up something out of all of it, and you moved across to have a look at the contents of the tall refrigerator hidden in the corner.

“Need help finding something?”

You startled, turning to look at him and closing the fridge, and his hands were on his hips as he stared at you, your arms wrapping around yourself gently as you shrugged. You couldn’t blame him for being a little putt-off, you were just a stranger after all, but you wanted to at least try and make proper amends with him, and so you let yourself be unbothered by the frustration flashing over his features.

“What are you looking for?”

“I was just seeing what you had in.” You waved a hand behind yourself, swallowing thickly and taking a small step around the dining table towards him. “I was just seeing what you had, because I was hoping to cook dinner for you, maybe? Y’know, as a thank you for letting me stay with you, and keeping me warm and all, even though I was rude this morning.”

“Oh.” The tightness in his shoulders loosened, his body slumping a little, tension melting away, and a bashful look flickered over the anger, taking its place as he tried to muster a smile for you. “That would, uh, be nice. Thanks. I don’t have a lot in, though.”

“You really don’t. Do you just survive on junk food and pasta?”

He laughed, a genuine laugh at that, before he was standing before you and reaching over to the cupboards, pulling out a packet of pasta, and holding it out to you. “What’s wrong with junk food and pasta?”

“Nothing! But it’s all you have!”

He only grinned, opening the fridge and standing to the side, double-checking what he had in. “Well, I’ll have you know that I make a great minestrone, and that’s what I was planning to have for my dinner tonight. You can join me.”

“I don’t know how to make that.”

“Well, I’ll teach you, and it’ll change your life. I swear it.” He closed the fridge, leaning back against it with a questioning look on his face, and you shrugged, but you felt a lot more comfortable already, the simple banter between you both mending a broken bridge.

“I was supposed to be cooking you dinner though.”

“You can be my sous-chef, how about that?” Now that was a deal you could work with, and you shook his hand, this time it was filled with giggles and wide smiles, as opposed to the last time you’d come to an agreement over breakfast only a few hours ago, the beginning of the day bringing much brighter prospects than the early morning had. “Now, what do you want to do until then?”

That was a good question, and it took you a minute to think about it, eyes glancing around his apartment for inspiration, pausing on the television stand with boxes of games stacked up underneath, and you lit up a little. “How about board games?”

He groaned, loudly, and you found amusement in it once again, being that this was his apartment, and he was finding issues with his own methods of entertainment and possessions. “Nobody plays board games while sober.”

“It's midday! We’re not getting drunk at midday!”

It was scandalous, and you didn’t have much more space to give over to scandals within the next twenty-four hours, pretty much having reached your quota already, and a cheeky look flickered over his features. “Well, we don’t necessarily have to drink..”

“What are you suggesting?”

Your eyes narrowed on him, and he spun on his heel, not saying a thing but letting you follow him. He cleared the books from the coffee table, stacking them all away on the floor in the corner, before lifting up the fold in the middle. He reached inside, and you waited patiently, your jaw dropping as he revealed the item to you, looking more than proud of himself.

A bong, tall with green glass, and it was decorated and bejewelled along the bottom, stickers and actions figures stuck to it, the whole collections making you snort a laugh as you looked at him, before your hands were landing on your hips and a look that you hoped read as ‘seriously?’ written on your face.

“What, you don’t want to?” He waited a moment longer, nibbling on his lower lip, before sitting on the opposite side of the coffee table and finding his lighter. He also reached for the first box on the top of the file, producing a box with one word across the front, brightly coloured and you recognised it. “Suit yourself, but I am. I need something to get through the whole afternoon with you.”

The comment would have stung a lot more had it not been for the cheeky wink that he added onto the end to tell you he was joking, and you sat cross-legged opposite him, picking up the box labelled ‘UNO’ and tipping the deck out into your hands. He clicked at the lighter, waiting for it to spark up, before his mouth was meeting one end of the glass, the contents inside bubbling and gurgling a little as he inhaled, and you dealt out the cards.

He hummed, head tipping back, eyes closed as he settled into the feeling of his eye, and as though he could feel you watching him, his head fell forwards, eyes opening to look at you. “Sure you don’t want any?”

You waited only a moment longer, before huffing out, holding your hand out for them both. “Fine, hand it over.” He placed both pieces on the table, sliding them across the polished wood to you, and you picked them up. Clicking on the flame, you adjusted it in your hand, lips pressing to the cool rim of glass, swilling it a little for good measure, before you were lighting up the end.

Steamy smoke curled up into your lungs as you inhaled deeply, warmth racing through your body as a tingling kind of feeling ran through your throat, tickling and making you grin, in a way that you were familiar with and yet hadn't been accustomed to in a long time. The buzzing feeling raced through your body, already kick-starting nerves and reactions that had felt dormant for a long time.

You hadn't been to a party, a real and exciting college party, since your break up. You’d locked in and sealed yourself away ever since your heart had been broken, and it felt good to adventure back out into the world like this, even if you were locked away with a guy from halfway across town whom you’d known for about twelve hours. “Okay, you were right.”

“Feel better?” He grinned, holding his hand out for the device, and for a little while, the two of you simply shared it between you, letting that initial tingle grow into a proper buzz the world around you beginning to slip away into a haze. Your vision was soft around the edges, slightly out of focus, and the world felt a little more comfortable. Spreading your legs out underneath the coffee table, your back leaned against the couch, feet in his lap as he sat with his legs crossed and folded under him.

When you’d decided your high was enough, you’d started with the games. ‘UNO’ had brought on rivalry and chaos, the two of you raising your voices to the point that you’d been yelling at one another, throats going a little sore as you cursed and laughed, not quite sentient enough now to make the best calls at the game, and so it had felt like it had dragged on for hours, before you had finally been the champion.

He had challenged you to a rematch in the form of a board game called ‘Frustration’, and the two of you had been so busy playing that the time was slipping away around you, the board being flipped by you as he began to win, counters scattering across the floor, and he looked completely and utterly insulted at it, before cracking up laughing with you once again.

After that, you had sprawled all of the games out over the floor, some of them being team games that you were unable to play together, and you’d refused to play a drawing game with him, because you’d peeked at his designs, and were scared to showcase your own drawing in front of him, worried that he’d completely put you to shame and leave you embarrassed.

Poker had been too much of a challenge, half of the pieces for the monopoly board were missing, and you’d done every round of Mario Kart at least once by the time it had come to turning off the console under the TV. Joining you by your side, the two of you were slumped lazily into the couch cushions, shoulders pressed together as the bong sat between you, fresh hits racing through your systems to keep everything exciting, but the thrill of the act itself was beginning to die off, and you were once again out of things to do for entertainment.

At some point, the light outside of the windows had faded, the clumps of snow that had been left along the windowsill were still rising, flakes still falling in flurries from the clouds, except what had once been visible in the day was now dark, the low light of the lamps in the room spilling golden light out across the walls and carpet. Rolling your head to the side, you took in the man sitting before you, watching as he tapped his feet repetitively on the coffee table to the beat of a song you didn’t recognise.

“I looked at your drawings.”

“What?” He paused, twisting to look at you, and he sat up a little further.

“I was being nosey. Earlier, I looked at the drawings in your sketchbook.” His gaze flickered to the leather-bound book in the corner, stacked up with the rest of his belongings, before getting up and putting the bong away, folding the edge of the table back down, and wiping a hand over his face, cheeks tinted pink, and you weren’t sure if it was from the warmth of the room or out of embarrassment. “They’re incredible. Some of the best illustrations I’ve ever seen, actually.”

“You really think so?”

“Yeah. I could never draw like that. I can’t even draw stick men without them being wobbly, sometimes.” He smiled again at that, and you found an odd feeling running through you at the idea that you were able to make him smile, your stomach clenching and twisting as he looked at you fondly, shaking his head a little, eyes dropping to the floor.

“I don’t get a lot of practice with it, I can’t get any apprenticeships yet because nobody wants to hire someone who’s only experience is in one element. Mine being fantasy-sorts, I suppose.”

“Will you draw me?”

“What?” He looked a little startled, eyes wide, and you shuffled forwards on the couch, hand twitching to reach out and take his as you tried to reassure him, watching uncertainty flick over his face. “I don’t really have experience with drawing people. More the imaginary things, described but never seen, less to fuck up if there’s nothing to compare it to.”

“I don’t think you’ll fuck it up.” He swallowed thickly, moving to kneel on the other side of the table, his sketchbook in hands as he fidgeted with it.

“If I mess it up, don’t make me show you, okay?” You only nodded, and he hesitated a moment longer, before getting himself into a more comfortable position, searching through the drawers around him to find his pencils and equipment, laying them out and taking an extra amount of time to line them all up perfectly, and you were sure it was because he wanted to give himself a spare few seconds to hype himself up to it.

You waited patiently, just now beginning to process what was about to happen, and that you’d have to sit still for a long time, while he stared at you, drawing every highlight and flaw of you, while you remained steady under his gaze for as long as it took. When he was ready, you moved yourself a little more, sinking down onto the floor after rounding the coffee table, sitting at the side of it as he positioned you.

“Can you, um-” He tugged two fingers on his own t-shirt, and you looked down at your hoodie, the hood of it crowding around your shoulders, and you nodded, tugging it up from the bottom and over your head. A cool breeze swept over your skin, exposed with only the thin satin camisole hanging on your body to keep you warm, but you felt yourself light up on fire with the way his eyes swept over you. “However you’re comfortable. I’m just going to draw your head and shoulders, so, do whatever you want.”

You pressed your elbows to the wood, hand forming a loose fist and your cheek pressed to it, leaning like that, a slight ankle, and he nodded his head to himself, seeming to approve of the pose. Picking up a pencil, he studied you for a second, the nib hovering over the paper as he held it at an angle that couldn't see, perfect for him to work on though, before stopping.

Placing the pencil between his lips, he held it there, reaching forwards to pull a few strands of your hair free on either side, framing your face and letting them dangle there, curling one around his finger a little to make it twisted, before he was pulling back. “You’re so pretty.”

After that, he was working. Quick strokes of his pencil over the paper as he created the first outline of you, your head, where and how your hair would fall, your hand holding up your head and down to the spaghetti straps on your shoulders, quick movements, a lot of erasing, and very light brushes of the graphite over the paper. Once he was sure he had the form right, only a few minutes in, he started on the details.

His eyes, lingering on your face, licking at his lips to keep them wet as he worked, parted for short breaths, unaware of what he was doing and you resisted biting down on your own as you looked at him, trying to hold your position. It was hard, the look of concentration on his face while staring at your mouth, or the determination in his eyes as he held your gaze and yet was so far away, taking in every little detail, until he was rubbing his finger over certain spots to create shading, and create the minute detailed with finally sharped tips.

Your arm was sore and neck aching when he finally told you that you could sit up, and you rolled your head from side to side, loosening the muscles and tendons that had begun to lock up from the prolonged length of time motionless. He was clutching the pad to his chest, fingers tapping at the back, some slightly smudged with grey graphite, and you inched closer to him.

“Can I see?”

“I haven’t decided yet.” He tried to laugh at his own comment, but was nervous, and you placed a hand over his gently, pulling it toward you slowly, and he gave no reluctance, but wasn’t moving of his own accord. “Okay, you can look, but you have to remember that I’m not good at drawing people, and I’m still high as fuck.”

You’d almost forgotten about that, and it was just now clicking with you why you’d been bold enough to do something like model for a sketch, your inhibitions lower, the boldness of nightfall giving you yet another boost in something that you’d never have done earlier in the day. Taking it from him, you turned it around, seeing the nervous look on his face before you were looking down at the sketch. His own worries had prepared you for the worst, but as you looked at it, you decided it wasn’t all that bad.

There was certainly work to be done, but he had the basic forms down, even you could tell that. It was clear that his skill lay elsewhere, the detailing of things like fins and scales was nothing like drawing the subtle imperfections of skin and the dips and dimples of a face, the creases where a fist held a head up nothing like the folds along the back of a monster, but he certainly had a grounding to work from, and you loved what you were seeing despite it all.

“I love it.”

“You’re totally lying to me.” He mumbled, and you shook your head, placing the notepad down, and fixing your attention on him. “It fuckin’ sucks.”

“It does not! I think it's really good. Especially since you said you had no practice, I was expecting something bad. This is so much better than you made it out to be.”

His lips flicked up at the sides, his head raising, bringing him a little closer to you as he straightened out, feeling better about it all now. “You should’ve seen some of the things I drew in high school. My portraits were awful back then, but I was drawing people while in the car, so it wasn't the smoothest of working places.”

“Yeah, well, I think you’ve come a long way since high school, and I think you’re really talented.”

He hummed, eyes flicking down to your lips again, and this time, as he licked at his own, there was no excuse of artwork, or anything else, your heart jumping slightly in your chest. There was a moment, a second’s hesitation as you questioned whether this was what you wanted. There was time to stop, to pull back, his nose bumping yours lightly, warm breath washing over your mouth, and you were a second away from closing the gap, before loud knocking was sounding at the door, and making the decision for you.

Pulling back, his gaze went over your head, brows furrowing as he stared at the door. “Hello?”

You winced at the loud shout, and he mumbled an apology upon realising it, slight disappointment surging through you, but not as much as relief. You were growing more and more attached to this man, but at the end of the snowstorm, you’d still have to leave, and he was still a stranger. You were high, and the romanticism of the situation was morphing things to look rose-tinted and alluring, and you wanted to be of a rational mind to make a decision like that. “Hey, Joel! It’s Mandy, I was wondering if you would grab your stuff from the laundry room, so I can put a couple of loads through?”

His eyes went wide, gaze dropping to your own for a second. “Shit, I totally forgot about the laundry!”

His hand slipped down to yours, fingers lacing together as he tugged you up from the floor, handing you the basket that had been discarded hours ago, and he opened the door, an older woman who looked positively exhausted, arms full of boy’s clothing, and you pitied her knowing that she must be trapped in a shoebox apartment with a son who would be bouncing off of the walls and unable to burn off that energy.

“Sorry, Mandy, I forgot about it. We’ll grab it now.”

“We?” You muttered, the woman’s eyes flickering over you in amusement, and you were tugged out of the apartment and towards the stairs quickly, hearing the door close behind you, and the much slower steps of the tired mother as she trailed you.

The concrete was cold underfoot, especially the lower you got, and you hissed as your sock-covered feet hit the icy stone, never having had a chance to put on your shoes. Putting the container down, he opened it up, steam curling out into the air, even though the dryer had been finished for hours.

‘You couldn't have let me put my jumper on before we came down here? It’s literally freezing over right outside that window.” You mumbled, Joel turning to you, and he cringed a little, as though he had only just remembered the scrap of fabric you were wearing as a top. Pulling an armful of the warm clothing, he sorted through them, pulling a cosy looking jacket from within, and wrapping it over your shoulders. Heat seeped back into your body, warmed from the machine, and you barely noticed the mother entering the room, waiting for Joel to clear his clothes out, watching as you ripped the hoodie up along the front of your body, hood pulled up and hands made into paws by the long sleeves.

“You look cute.”

“I look cold.” You retorted, and he only rolled his eyes, but Mandy laughed, and that was enough recognition for you.

“Yeah, well, we can make some hot food when we get upstairs and you’ll be fine, how about that?” He sat the collection under one arm, offering his other hand to you, and you pushed up the sleeve of the borrowed hoodie, weaving your fingers with his as he guided you from the room.

“I’ve been waiting for this minestrone you’ve been boasting about. I need to see if it lives up to the hype.

“Hey, everyone loves my minestrone!” He backed his way into the home, dropping your hand in order to place down the basket that wouldn’t be looked at for hours now, you were sure. He ushered you into the kitchen, hurting you along until his hands were tickling at your sides and you were squirming under his touch, laugh loudly as he pushed you into the little room.

You worked alongside him, trying to take in the information he was giving to you but it was hard, because the little things he was doing were distracting you. The way in which his hands moved as he chopped the vegetables or prepare the meat, the passionate easy his voice sounded as he told you all about it, his eyes sparkling a little while instructing you, and the little jokes he’d make while bumping you out of the way with his hip, or guiding you around with nudges of his elbow or shoulders.

While cooking, he opened up a little, a story that you’d never have expected to learn from him, but he told you anyway. His parents had died in a car accident when he was young, too young to really remember them, but he’s been allowed to take several boxes of things with him to his foster home as he waited for adoption, and he’d taken his mother’s recipe book as one of those items.

When he’d been adopted, a man whose family had died and he’d become a foster parent, had helped him experiment with his cooking and drawing, instead of forcing him into typical paths for men to take, making him become a football player or a lawyer like he’d expected he’d end up after leaving the system.

A younger sister, also adopted from another family called Minnow, and a dog adopted from a shelter called ‘Boy’, and suddenly, in the space of time that it had taken to make the meal, delicious smell floating around you, he’d spilled to you his history, and you’d listened quietly as he got it off his chest, figuring out somewhere along the way that you were probably one of the only people to ever know this story.

You weren’t sure if that brought you comfort or not, whether he was telling you out of trust and connection, or whether he was telling you because he knew that you’d never see one another again after today, and so he didn’t mind sharing his deepest protected truths. During the heavy discussion, the nibbling of food and the time passing you by, the high you’d once claimed was beginning to fizzle out, everything coming back to sharpness once again, and yet somehow, just by being in his presence, you still felt that same freedom.

When you were sitting back at the table, he was staring at you with excitement now, watching as you lifted a spoonful of the concoction to your lips to try it, seemingly leaving behind the heavy conversation that had taken place as he simply moved on. You took a longer than needed time to assess it, humming contemplatively just to put him through his paces, before finally giving in.

“Okay, this is really good, I’ll give you that.”

“I told you so!” He cheered loudly, arms thrown up in the air, and you laughed a little, tucking into your meal, and wiping up one of the bread rolls that he'd placed into the middle of the table for you both.

You were tempted to ask him for the recipe, knowing that one day you’d be craving it again, and yet, you weren’t sure if you could, whether it would be appropriate or whether that would be crossing a line, to ask to take away a piece of something that he shared with his late mother.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Shoot.” You spoke, tearing off a mouthful of bread roll after dipping it into the soup mix, and chewing slowly as you waited for him to reply.  

“Did you mean it?” You paused your chewing, confusion making itself known on your face as you silently questioned what he meant, stirring your dinner with your spoon as you waited for him to elaborate, and he swallowed his mouthful to do so. “When you said my name sounded like a first draft of a name.”

For the umpteenth time today, embarrassment and regret was flooding through you, and you took your time to finish the food you were eating, his gaze lingering on you as he waited. When you couldn't stall any longer, you sipped at your water, before giving in. “Yes, I did.” His mouth pursed into a thin line, and you reached a hand out across the table, trying to contain your amusement. “Like, a really good first draft, though, almost there!”

“Nice save.”

Silence fell between you both once again, eating food in a comfortable quiet, and once again the direct parallel to this morning’s porridge struck through you, only twelve hours having passed and yet absolutely everything was different between you both. You couldn't put your finger on what it was about him, something that had caught your attention the first time around had now got you captive again, and there was just something adorably charming about everything he did.

Handsome but bashful, shy but cocky, always making jokes but somehow being able to jump right into something deep and meaningful too, and you’d closed yourself off for so long that it was a little scary for everything you were feeling to come rushing back all at once.

You hadn't had a crush since high school, and you weren’t sure if you liked the idea of one forming now.

“What about the other thing, did you mean that, too?” You searched your mind, reliving that argument as you tried to work out what he was referring to, and you almost dropped your spoon as it all came crashing down, remembering the harsh words that you’d spat in the eat of the moment, and yet it didn’t make them any less true. You only nodded your head, and he let out a loud groan, pouting a little. “Well, that fucking sucks.”

“Don’t be too hard on yourself, it’s really hard to do! Women are just better at doing that themselves, y’know? We don’t have to talk about it.”

“That doesn't help! You can’t just, like, drop a bomb on me like that; ‘hey, maybe you've never made a girl come in your entire freakin’ life’ and then say you don’t want to talk about it!” He pushed his empty dish away from himself, and your brows raised, arms crossing over atop the table, staring at him critically, and deciding you were finished with your food. “I want to talk!”

“No way! Guys can't handle constructive criticism like that! We’ll end up just like we were this morning, and then we’ll be back to square one! I like how we are now!”

“No! I promise you, I can take it. Just, help me out, here?” He reached out, pushing the dishes out of the way so that nothing was in the way, putting on his best puppy dog eyes. “You help me, I’ll help you.”

“What do you mean help me? You think you got pointers for me?”

“This isn’t a one-way street! Last night was awesome, but you could improve on a few things too. Guess you’ll never know, now, though.” He sighed, glancing off over your head, and you knew it was bait, some very obvious bait at that, and you hated to fall for it, but your own insecurities were getting the best of you, and you huffed loudly.

“Fine!” He turned back to you, a wicked smile on his lips as he realised that clearly, he had won. “I bite, you got me. Go!”

“Okay, this isn't just you, I just wanna’ make that clear to start with.” You raised a brow, leaning back in your chair, arm still crossed and listening intently. “What is with the whole lights off, thing? The fuck is that? If the lights are off, like you requested and I so gentlemanly obliged, I could be having sex with anything! I don’t want to be having sex with anything, I want to be having sex with you.” He paused, eyes darting away from you for only a second, and he wet his lips. “Or, y’know, whoever it is I’m with.”

“Lights on? Wow, and all guys feel this way?” He opened his mouth to reply, before you were letting out a loud ‘booing’ sound. “Duh! Girls hear that more than ‘hello’. That’s all you got?”

“Okay, okay, alright.” He smirked slightly, leaning forwards and resting his forearms on the table. “You, and by you, I mean women in general, do this thing where you stand up, and kinda’ turn away, and then get undressed, like, super-fast. Like you’re at the doctors or something, getting a physical!”

“I’ve never had any complaints about how fast I undress before. Most guys like naked me.”

“I love naked you.” He dropped his gaze, scanning along your body, and you threw a bread roll at him as you realised he was remembering you without your clothes on from the night before, the soft accompaniment bouncing from his head and rolling over the table. “Hey! I’m just saying! Naked you is awesome to look at, and touch, but what I mean is that you could make the getting to being naked part a little more exciting.”

“Exciting?”

“Yeah! You know, do that whole slow bra thing, take it off to the side. Drop it in that sexy way. Do that little ass thing with your panties, y’know, where you just-” He wiggled in his seat, demonstrating the little as movement that all girls did with their panties when they wanted to feel a little sexy. “All I’m saying is that guys like the undressing part too, make it more of a.. thing.”

“Anything else?”

“Yes, actually. One more thing.” He paused, this seemingly the one he was most nervous about, and you leaned forward on your elbows, watching him lean in a little too, rolling his lips before speaking. “When I was inside of you, you did this thing. You started helping yourself a little bit, it kind of made me feel like I was being benched. Second-string, forgotten.”

“Duly noted.” You mumbled, and he shrugged a little, the space between you both going void of sound but crackling with electricity. “Is it my turn now?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, first of all, I don’t know who taught guys to do that alphabet thing with their tongue, but it kind of makes me feel like I’m Helen Keller being fucked by her teacher.”

“That’s not a fantasy of yours?” He faked shock, and you tried to cover up your laugh to keep the conversation as serious as you could, and he tried to still himself, nodding for you to continue.

“There was this one moment, during foreplay, where I was close to coming, and I’m pretty sure I subtly pointed it out. Do you remember what I said?”

“Uh, ‘I’m close to coming’?”

“Yes, that’s it!” He scowled falsely, unsure where you were going with this, and it was your turn to smirk a little. “Right after I said that, you totally switched up what you were doing. What was the thought process there? If you had me right there at third, home base in sight, why would you start running in a different direction?”

“Okay, got it. That’s actually helpful.”

“All my tips are helpful! Like, also, you waited for me to undress you. Which was awkward, and a little weird, don’t do that.” You were almost out of advice, pausing for a second to think. “When a girl helps out, that's a good thing! This is sex, not a competition, my ex was weird about that too, just embrace the team spirit, it makes it better for everyone.” He nodded, and you felt a little out of breath, but a weight lifted off your shoulders. “Oh! Yeah, you went too fast. I felt like I was being drilled for oil. Girls want fast, but also slow. Kinda’ felt like you were in a rush, had somewhere better to be.”

“Trust me, I didn’t.”

“Obviously.” You teased, and he grinned, taking in all the information you were giving him. “Lastly, I guess it’s just after. Like, as soon as we finished, you retreated to the other side of the bed like you’d planted a bomb down there. Stick around, hold a girl, count to ten or something. That one will get you a long way, trust me.”

“Cuddling. Noted.”

“Other than that, you were a perfectly adequate lover.” He gaped at you a little, and his whole body sagged.

“Adequate? What a way to boost a guy’s ego.”

“See, I knew this would happen, you’re-”

“Fine! I’m fine!” He reached out, placing a hand over one of yours, and squeezing comfortingly. “Seriously, now I know. I can make use of that advice next time.” He offered you a smile, and you tried to return it, nervous butterflies making you feel a little nauseous as you tried to settle yourself, no indication that he was angry or upset with you. “You said something about your ex in there, y’know. Is that why you broke up, crappy sex?”

You knew it was meant as a joke, something to lighten the mood, but your stomach dropped. “Uh, no.” You cleared your throat, hands pulling from his to clasp them in your lap as you looked away. “That would’ve been because I found him in our bed with one of my friends.”

The air went dead, silence encased you, and you heard the legs of his chair scrape on the floor as he pushed it back. Kneeling in front of you, he took your hands in his, forcing you to meet his eye. “I’m really sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up.”

“It’s okay. At least I know she isn't getting much.”

He chuckled, but it was dry and empty, and he reached up, brushing a thumb over your cheek. “For the record, I think he’s a dipshit. You’re an amazing girl, anybody who would cheat on you isn’t worth you.”

“Thanks, Joel.”

He stood up, pulling you with him, until you were standing up once again. “Go find another film. I’ll get us all sorted here. Anything you want, it’ll cheer you up.” You waited a moment longer, ready to do as he’d said, before a set of lips were brushing against your forehead, and your breath hitched in your throat. Pressing into the touch just a little, it was almost embarrassing how you reacted, how much you’d missed simple affections, how it felt to be excited around someone instead of just bored or dreading having to see them, the excitement of once again experiencing the thrill of something invigorating and new. “I’m honestly sorry for bringing it up.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“Kinda’ is.” He mumbled, fingers playing with yours lightly where your hands were still hanging connected, and the whole experience was a little different. This wasn’t a near-miss kiss while high after the intimacy of drawing one another, nor was it holding hands in the rush to get to the laundry room while hopped up on adrenaline and a little embarrassment. “He’s a moron, and he didn’t deserve you. Neither did your friend, if she’d do something like that to you.”

“They deserve each other.”

“Atta’ girl.” He teased, squeezing your hand once more, before letting you go, and as you settled down onto the couch cushions, you had to try hard just to steady your racing heart as you scroll through movies on Netflix, perched happily along the couch, but it was a little chilly, the space heater was barely holding its own against the chill of the outside.

“You got any blankets?” You didn’t even bother turning your head as you shouted the words, still exploring the film choices, and this time, you went for something a little more exciting. A ‘Mission Impossible’ movie was always a hit, right? Everybody loves Tom Cruise.

“Yes, I do.” You jumped, never having heard him moving around, and he stood before you, a fluffy looking blanket bundled in his arms, and you made grabby-hands for it with a grin. He shook his head, slumping down beside you on the ouch, and you bounced a little with the movements he made. “What, you think I read your mind? This blanket is for me, but I might just share it with you.”

“Yeah, what’s the catch?”

“You have to smile, so I know you’re really okay.” You couldn’t help it, trying to bite back the grin on your face as you flushed with shy heat, and he whooped loudly upon seeing the expression. Spreading the blanket out across you both, his fingers brushed across your skin, tucking it around your thighs and over your waist as he and sure you were covered, before his arm was stretching out along the back of the couch behind you.

“You’re too smooth for your own good.”

“Don’t get used to it, I’m incredibly awkward and not nearly as brave, usually.” You rolled your eyes, nudging your shoulder against his but not bothering to say anything, and starting up the movie.

Tucking your legs underneath yourself, you adjusted the blanket, your feet cold as you lifted them up from the cooled flooring, and directing your attention over to your phone. It had been hours since you’d check it, since you'd even felt the need to know whether anyone else had been in touch with you, and even as that realisation came to mind, you still didn’t budge to collect it.

Earlier in the day, you had been bitter and wishing to be home, where you’d inevitably only be locked up tight in your own bedroom and watching movies to pass the time away, listening to Sophie and her boyfriend move around the apartment, trapped in permanently third-wheeling until the snow melted. Now, you were happy, knowing that you’d made a new friend, and that you were at least venturing back out into the world for the first time since having your heart broken.

A hand came down, fingers playing with the edges of your hair lightly, twirling a light strand between his fingers, and as you swept your gaze over the man a foot or so away from you on the couch, his eyes were still fixed on the screen of the television. His fingers brushed against your neck occasionally, and each time, you had to suppress the urge to shiver. It was an invitation, the changing for day to night once again shifting everything between you both, unspoken words to invite you closer, easy for you to choose to take, or not to take, and nothing would be said about it at all.

Your entire body ran over with goosebumps, and your fingers picked lightly at the blanket, unsure of which move you wanted to make. On the one hand, you could definitely take that step, move a little closer and risk falling into that again, or you could stay where you were, play it safe and not risk a thing. Fold your cards and wait for the next round.

“I’ll just be a minute, okay?”

You stood up, his hand falling away from yourself and the blanket laying down on the couch, and he nodded his head, a barely present smile on his face as he nodded his head, and you slipped away, giving yourself just a moment to think as you disappeared to the bathroom. Closing the door behind yourself, you leaned back against it, letting out a deep breath and trying to clear your mind, weighing the pros and cons of where this night might go.

Shaking yourself down a little, you felt the tension flee from your body, and you placed your hands onto the sink, staring at yourself in the mirror hanging over it. You were always playing it safe, always had, and maybe that’s why your ex had adventured and found excitement somewhere else, needing the thrill of it, because you never took risks.

If you hadn't taken a risk last night, you wouldn't be here now, and after all, you’d had a great day. Maybe it would blow up and backfire, maybe when the snow melted you’d never see him again, maybe it wouldn't work out, but you’d never know if you didn’t at least try.

“Oh, woman up. For once in your life.” You muttered, running the water and splashing a little of the cool liquid over your face, refreshing yourself with just how icy cold it was, a little hiss leaving you. Shaking your hands off and patting your face dry, you ran a hand through your hair, deciding you were ready. Uncapping the toothpaste, you took a small chunk from it on your finger, placing the blob onto your tongue and licking it around your mouth for freshness, doing the best you could to clean your teeth a little, before using your hands as a cup and rinsing with some water.

At least you felt a little fresher and more alluring now. A good confidence booster, because fuck it, you were all in.

Stepping back out into the main room, you undid the zipper on the hoodie of his that you’d borrowed, letting it hang open along the front, the thin satin of your camisole on display, the material falling away from one shoulder as it hung baggy on your body now that it was open. Upon your return, he turned to look at you, lips parting a little as his eyes flickered along your body, gaze lingering on the exposed skin of your shoulder, your arms, the midriff shown between the edge of your top and the hem of your leggings, before his jaw was snapping shut, and he met your eyes again, only for a split second, before looking back to the movie.

Lifting the edge of the blanket, you sat a little closer to him than you had been before, your arm brushing against his side as you got comfy, and you heard him let out a slightly shaky breath, fingers tapping against the back of the couch, behind where your head had once been, now further down the couch as you sat close enough to smell the lingering aftershave on his skin.

Five long minutes passed, and you almost thought you’d overstepped, that he didn’t want this as much as you thought he would, that the connection was one-sided, but then his hand slipped down, fingers brushing over the bare skin of your shoulder on the side where the jacket had dipped down, nails scraping slightly, before the rest of his arm followed. Slipping it around your shoulders, his hand hung over you, playing lightly with the spaghetti strap of your top, running along the silky material, under it, playing with it in slow and absentminded patterns, and you contained yourself from celebrating out loud, or doing something that wouldn't be considered as ‘playing it cool’.

You paused, giving it just enough time, the feeling of roughened fingertips rubbing along your skin, and after a moment, you realised it was being inched a little further over. As the strap fell away, falling over your arm again, his movements paused, everything going still for just a second, before his fingertips were pressing to bare skin again. Twisting towards him a little more, you pressed up to his side, lifting a leg until the lower half of your legs were tangled together as they sat ahead of you, propped up on the coffee table.

He hummed a little under his breath, your head adjusting to rest on his shoulder, and he dared to reach his fingers a little lower than just along your shoulder, brushing as far as the undersides of your collarbones, and you cuddled in a little closer to him still.

“I can’t stop thinking about what you said.” His words were gruff, voice low and gravelling as he kept his tone to just above a whisper, and you rolled your lips together for a second, trying to settle on your words.

“And what would that be?”

“Well, y’know, all the improvements I could make. I’ve been thinking about it.” You only hummed, fingers smoothing over his stomach and across towards his side until you were holding onto him, and the muscles underneath tensed and rippled under the soft cotton tee he was wearing. “But, I’d never really know if I was getting it right until I put it into practice.”

“Well, that does make sense.”

“Yeah, and I mean, I’d need someone who could tell me, give me real talk.” He was continuing on with the rouse, the playful energy between you both sparkling, and the movie was long-forgotten, simply becoming background noise.

“Makes sense. Someone to guide you as you go.”

“Exactly.” He mumbled, turning himself enough to drag the tip of his nose over your cheek, and you tipped your head back a little, making it easier for him as his lips brushed your cheek. “Know anyone up for the task?”

“I think I might know someone.” You whispered, hand coming up to lace into his hair, and he rumbled happily at the scrape of your nails over his scalp.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” You promised, and he grinned, shifting enough to let his mouth slant across yours, a kiss that was more than overdue. Lifting a hand to sit on his jaw, he pressed into you a little further, one hand still behind the couch, while the other was sliding down to find your waist, the blanket falling away and the movie becoming nothing but background noise as his lips worked softly with your own.

You’d expected hot and sloppy, but he was taking it slower this time, sweet and passionate, not nearly as desperate as you’d been anticipating, and your heart was racing in your chest with the tenderness in which he kissed you. Once the blanket was kicked from your legs, his hand dipped a little lower, smoothing around your lower back, and pulling you in towards him until you could drape a leg over his thighs. Settling into his lap, both of hands were sitting low on your hips, teeth grazing along your lower lip as the what between you both seemed to double, and you pressed a little closer into him.

“Put your hands, just-” You took a hold of his wrists, lowering his hands a little, your forehead pressed to his as you pushed them around until he could hold fistfuls of your ass through your leggings, squeezing tightly, and you keened into his touch. Rocking your hips down into his own, you gasped, his grunt at the feeling being silenced as your lips closed back over his, and he hummed happily when your tongue dragged slowly against his.

For each rock you made down into him, his hips were jumping, small thrust upwards to meet you, and it became more frantic with every little movement. He was growing underneath you, the material of his sweats doing little to hide the hardening cock that seemed to twitch and jump each time you dragged your core along his length, even through the layers of material, and you could feel yourself growing wetter and weather, uncomfortably so the longer your went, but the pressure was perfect, an orgasm already beginning to grow within you.

When the burn for oxygen became too much, he pulled back, lips worked along your jaw slowly, soft sucks that weren’t hard enough to leave bruises but sent sparks of electricity and excitement flooding through you each time, nips at your skin as he worked his way down your neck, until he was biting teasingly at the shoulder with the strap of your top still hanging over your arm, bare skin exposed to him. “You know, not a criticism, just a compliment, but you really got kissing down to an art.”

He chuckled against your skin, a little breathless, but still enough to make you tremble at the feeling, before he was making his way back up to you, nose dragging over your skin until his mouth could brush against yours. “Is that so?”

“Totally.” You mumbled, your hand slipping into his hair to hold onto a fistful as his mouth crashed back into your own, and he put those skills to good use. He all but knocked the oxygen from your lungs with the intensity of it, leaving your head spinning and lungs burning but you were unable to pull away, the addictive way that his mouth worked with your own, so sensual and intimate that you were flaring up with heat, and you finally knew what it felt like when people said there were fireworks in a kiss, because you felt as though the fourth of July was exploding around you.

“Bedroom?”

“Absolutely.” You mumbled, having to tear yourself away from his kisses, diving back in a few times, before finally, you managed to pull yourself away. You took his hands in your own, pulling him up with you as the two of you moved, and his hands found your hips, guiding you in your backwards walking steps as he followed behind you; foreheads pressed together, occasionally pressing sweet kisses to one another, giggles shared into the air between you until you came to a stop in the doorway.

Turning around, you paused, more of a laugh erupting from you.

“First criticism, messy sheets is a turn off.” He sounded confused for a second, mouth leaving where he had been kissing along your neck, his head coming up to take a look, and he huffed a little.

“Right, yeah, forgot about that. Let me just-” He moved away, on side of the bed to straighten the blankets out, pushing the pillows back up to the top end of the bed, and you helped out, smoothing over them until the job was done haphazardly, but at least it least it was no longer messy, and he stood on the opposite side from you, hands on his hips for a second. “Better?”

“Much.” He nodded his head, licking over his lips, and taking the lower one prisoner as his gaze swept over you, His hair was a little messy, cheeks flushed and lips swollen, and you were certain that you looked exactly the same, the tension between the two of you sizzling. You couldn't handle it, the two of you meeting halfway as you knelt on the bed, his body colliding with yours and lips meeting in frenzied kisses as you connected again.

He reached a hand behind his head, tugging his shirt up and away from his body, a delicious display of flexing muscles and veiny forearms as he discarded of it, shaking the hair that flopped down into his face free.

“That was hot.”

“All I did was take off my shirt?” He whispered, pulling back when you tried to kiss him so that he could raise his brows in silent questioning.

“We like that. When you do that whole ‘taking your shirt off with one hand behind your head’ thing. Plus, you just looked good while doing it.” He looked down at himself, before back up to you, hands cupping your face to bring you in closer to him, and he pressed a series of pecks to your lips, until you were laughing lightly and pushing him back with hands spread over his chest.

He followed you as you stood, and you undid the rest of the zip on the hoodie, letting it fall open, and down your arms slowly, and he watched it go, until the material was crumpled in a pile around your feet. Placing your hands on his chest, you pushed him backwards, until his knees were buckling against the mattress and he was sitting down, staring up at you with wide eyes and parted lips, waiting for your next move. With a finger under his chin, you tipped his face upwards, enough to be able to peck his lips, before you were stepping away from him.

Turning away, you heard him shuffling, the ruffling of material and the slight creaking of the bed, before it was silent, and you took a steadying breath. Crossing your arms over your middle, you tugged the satin top up slowly, brushing your own fingers over your skin, and you heard him groan behind you as it hit the floor, hair falling back down your back upon being freed from the material. Hooking your fingers into the edge of your leggings, you peeled them down your legs, bending at the waist, and removing them from your feet, slowly, before turning back to face him, clad only in your panties.

His eyes were half-lidded, and jaw hanging slack, only clad in his boxers now, but he was palming himself through the material as he sat propped up in the pillows, and you rounded to his side of the bed, one of his hands reaching out for you, and you took it, a gentle hold as his fingers weaved with yours.

“How was that?”

“So fucking hot.” He mumbled, the hand that he had been using to rub at his hard cock through his boxers came free, a wet patch left across the front of the pale checkered fabric, precum soaking into them and your thighs clenched at the idea of having that effect on him. Running the tip of one finger under the waistband of your panties, he tugged you a little closer to him still, before snapping the elastic against your skin. “What about these?”

“Figured you might want to do that.”

Your eyes dropped to his mouth, before meeting his gaze again, only a split second slip, but he was smirking, clearly having seen it. Before you could even process what he was doing, his arms had wrapped around your middle, twisting you around and lifting you to lay in the bed beside where he had been, your head in the pillows and his arms holding him up on either side of you, and you panted a little, the yelp that had left you making you breathless.

“Holy shit.”

“Couldn’t help it. You say dirty things and it makes me feel a little wild.” His legs were caging you in, moving lower and lower as he kissed his way over your collarbones, lips and tongue leaving wet trails between your breasts as he lowered himself further and further.

“Wild is good. I like wild.”

“Hm, I hope so.” He whispered the words, tongue grazing along the sensitive skin above your panties, before he was tapping at your hips with his fingers, and you were lifting them for him to shimmy your panties down. Once you were bare before him, you grew a little shy once again, legs snapping shut, and he chuckled, a hand landing on each knee, and he pressed kisses along the tops of your thighs. “Please don’t be shy, gorgeous. You’re so damn beautiful, you have nothing to be shy about.”

Squeezing his hands at your knees, you twitched a little, pushing yourself up onto your elbows to peer down at him, and he grinned, pressing a kiss to your stomach, before leaning up and pressing an equally quick but sweet kiss to your lips.

“Open up your pretty legs for me, yeah?”

You couldn't hold back, the way he was talking to you and touching you, loving caresses that soothed your nerves, and he groaned under his breath as your slick core was revealed to him. Legs bending at the knees, you planted your feet flat on the bedding, and he was able to settle on his stomach between them, hot breath fanning over your core.

His arms wrapped around your thighs, fingertips digging into them roughly, and he rubbed a hand up and down them slowly, the twitching in your gut coming to a still as he still managed to find time and sentience to ease your nerves as he pressed his mouth in sweet kisses along the insides of your thighs, biting a little at the top and chuckling as he felt you jerk in surprised shock. Lacing a hand into his hair just as his mouth moved to close over your core, you tugged lightly, his eyes flickering up to find yours. “What’s wrong, gorgeous? Did I mess something up?”

“No, no, you’re perfect.” Your words were panted out, and you were trembling while holding yourself up, but you shook your mind clear, trying to focus enough to break through the haze. “Just wanted to say thank you. You’re being such a sweetheart, I don’t think I’ve ever felt this confident before, so before my mind completely clears, I wanted to say that.”

He paused, a look flicking over his features to expose that he clearly didn’t expect that, and there was a much more adoring smile on his face as he processed your words. “It’s my pleasure, you’re worth it, and you deserve a guy to treat you like the special and incredible woman that you are.”

You choked a little on your breath, unsure of how to reply, so you swallowed the lump in your throat, nodding your head, before pushing his back down a little. “Okay, enough heart-to-heart crap. You can continue now.”

“As you wish, princess.”

He dragged his tongue once along your core slowly, and you took a sharp inhale of breath, the feeling of a hot and wet mouth working over you was something that you’d sorely missed, and while Joel had gone down on you yesterday too, this would be so much better and you already knew it. Instead of rushed and nervous, it was erotic and confident, sure in your movements, and sure that he could be the best you’d ever had, you could tell just from the way this night was going so far, that these memories would be burned in your mind for the rest of your life.

Rubbing a thumb over your clit, he chuckled at the way your thighs trembled slightly, before he was pulling away, diving in to replace his finger with his mouth. Lips sucking at the little bud, your fingers tightened in his hair, back arching at the feeling, and he licked over the bud, before repeating the process. Again, and again, and then, he was replacing his movements. Tongue flicking out, rapid kitten licks over the bud, and you squealed a little, thighs clamping around his head as you did, and you whined a little.

“Wait, Joel!” He paused after a moment, your entire body still tingling with the feeling of his mouth, but your legs loosened as he pulled them open, brows raising at you, and slick was already glistening on his chin. “Good, but can be better. Start slow, don’t go right in, tease me a little. Speed up when I’m closer, okay?”

“I thought girls hated being teased?”

“We can love it, if you do it right. You’ll know when to speed up, okay? Start slow, add a finger, then another, speed up when I’m getting close.” He nodded his head, a lopsided smile on his face, and he was taking your advice. He started slow, a long and torturous drag of his tongue over your core, and then again, before his tongue circled your entrance for a moment, barely dipping inside long enough to matter, but then he lapped at your core again. Lips sealing around your clit, he sucked harshly, your back arching up from the bed, your free hand finding purchase tangling in the bedding, and you moaned, loudly. “Fuck, yes, Joel. Just like that.”

He groaned into your body, the feeling reverberating along your skin, and one hand moved from your thigh, slipping along and disappearing from your skin until the tip of one nimble digit was circling your entrance, rubbing lightly across your weeping hole. Filthy sounds were already filling the room, and your mind was going completely blank, the only thing you could process right now was the movements of his mouth against you, tongue and lips working in tandem to drive you crazy as you bucked up into him, holding his face against your core as he slurped and sucked at every drop you had to release.

Slipping that finger into you, he had clearly taken our tip on teasing, because he only sunk it within you to the first knuckle, barely present at all, and yet your walls were clamping around him greedily, desperately trying to draw him deeper in as you felt him twist it a little, circling the finger and beginning to stretch you out, crooking it at the knuckle and tugging a little in your entrance as he began to pump it. A cry of his name left you as he bit down on your swollen clit lightly, the bud throbbing in response, and your entire body jumped at the sensation, loving the way he was taking control with it now.

Each time his finger dipped back into you, he sank a little further, his finger and tongue working in harmony, the same pace with their movements, and your entire body was layered in a thin sheen of shining sweat as he took you apart piece by piece. His hips were grinding down into the covers as he worked, the rustling of the covers giving it away, and he was grunting and growling against your every so often, his eyes closed as he enjoyed his motions just as much as you did, and you forced your hand free from him hair as you realised just how tight your fist had gotten. Just when you thought you might be getting used to this feeling, that you might be able to clear the fog in your mind enough to think straight, he sensed it, upping his ministrations.

“Fuck, Joel!” The coil in your stomach wound up ten times tighter in a matter of seconds as that dull tingling at your entrance made itself known, a second finger taking you by surprise as it plunged inside of you, and your back arched up so high your hips followed, borderline screaming as he picked up his pace. “I-I’m going to-”

“Come? Do it, come on, gorgeous. Give me all you got.” Faster movements, the tandem between his fingers and his mouth going to shit, as he continued to work his fingers in and out of you slowly, but his tongue was picking up his pace again. Switching between sucking and licking, you could barely process what was happening each time, and tears lined your eyes as you felt fire beginning to consume you.

Heat flooded your body, bliss filling every cell in your body and coursing through you until it was all-consuming, and you unravelled against him in a fit of squirming screams, his hands holding you to his mouth as he rode you through the pleasure, two fingers stretching you wide and scissoring you open each time, never giving up on his movements until you couldn't take it anymore.

You pushed him away, panting and gasping for breath, and his eyes were blown with lust as he pulled away, cheeks and chin shining with your arousal, your hand falling over your chest, feeling the erratic beating of your heart under your palm as your eyes closed, trying to contain the way you were feeling. Your throat was already scratchy, growing rough from the calls and cries of his name that you’d released.

“Good?”

“Is that even a question?” You teased, and he collapsed down into the bed beside you, wiping the back of his hand over his jaw, before you leaned in to kiss him, taking his lips with your own, and he let out a needy sound into your mouth as you did. He was rubbing at his jaw, pressing his lips lazily with your own as you kissed him, and he pressed you back down into the bed, leaning over you and letting his body press into yours.

One hand moved to his boxers, pushing them down, kicking them away until they were removed from his body. Leaning over you, a dripping cock brushed along your thigh, your leg raising up a little to rub against him, and he grunted into your mouth, biting down on your lower lip in warning, as he rooted through the nightstand to find a condom. Upon retrieving the package, he sat back on his heels, tearing it with his teeth and throwing the wrapper to the ground, a problem to be dealt with later, and he rolled the rubber along his length.

Long and flushed red, his cock was standing tall and proud, and you rubbed your thighs together a little, watching as he pumped himself slowly, eyes dragging over your body. You could see the cogs working in his mind, before he backed away from you entirely. Moving to the switch on the wall, he turned down the lights, leaving them on a little, but lowering them to a more comfortable level.

“Compromise?”

“I can work with that.” You offered, holding your hands out to him, and the bed bounced a little as he came to laying over the top of you. One leg was pressed between yours, and you shuffled, pressing yourself down against the muscle of his thigh, and a deep sound bubbled up from within him as you rode yourself against his thigh, kissing along his neck, and his head tipped back.

“For the record, I like hickies.”

You paused, a beat passing, before your mouth was sealing over the patch where his neck joined his shoulders, and he groaned loudly as you sucked at the skin harshly. Tipping his head back, his arms trembled a little dipping down until your chests were pressed together, and with every rolled of your core against his leg, your chest dragged over his, the friction making your nipples grown perky, and you whimpered into his neck, lapping at the spot you were abusing.

When you were finished, you pressed a sweet kiss over it, purple already beginning to blossom beneath the splotchy red on his pale skin, and he let out a shaky breath. Brushing your thumb over it, you smirked at the mark you’d made, before finally looking back up to him. Reaching a hand between your bodies, you took his cock in your hand, pumping slowly and watching as his jaw dropped slightly, before you were shifting your legs to accommodate his body and lining his length up at your core.

He rocked forwards, sinking into you slowly, and just like that, everything went fuzzy around you once again. It was like he was your only focus, everything was falling away until it was only him that remained, and your hands found his cheeks, pulling him down to kiss you. You were drowning in his touch, his hips nestled against your own as he gave you a moment to adjust to his size with you, that same twinge of an ache you’d felt this morning coming back in full force, but overpowered by the racing lust that was taking over.

When you felt ready, you clenched around him, curling your hips and feeling his cock shift within you, a gasp falling from you as the head of his cock brushed over your g-spot, and he took that chance to slip his tongue into your mouth. Hot and wet, everything felt like it was in overdrive as you lit up, and his hands were pressed into the mattress on either side of your head as he began to shift, hips drawing out of you, before sinking back in, and he took his time, moving slowly and waiting for you to tell him when he could speed up.

Lifting a leg up and onto his hip, he sank even deeper within you, your walls fluttering around him as you let out joint sounds of pure ecstasy, and his movements stuttered for only a moment at the feeling. One hand came down, fingertips digging into the muscle of your thighs so tightly that you’d be speckled with little polka dot bruises come morning, a sinful thought that made you head spin. You felt carefree, for the first time in your life, there was no doubts or anxiety, just the way it felt to be touched and cared for by him, the way his gaze swept so delicately over your face, or the way his lips puckered a little, curling up at the sides in a smile when your mouth pressed to his.

Hooking your hands under his arms, you encouraged him on, nails digging into his skin and dragging tracks into the flesh, his back arching up to push into your touch, and his pace began to pick up. He took his time, building the pace, and you’d never felt like this before. A high you’d never experienced was beginning to set in, your hips moving in time to match his thrusts.

He was panting into your mouth, hot and erotic as your foreheads remained pressed together, his lashes tickling against your cheeks, and every soft moan of your name that he let out made you want to scream out with pure bliss, because the way his voice cracked around your name made everything within you crumble. He made you weak, he made you completely fall apart, and you weren’t sure how or why, yet you found yourself loving it.

It was raw and exposed, your heart and soul open to him, and instead of crushing it like you’d grown to expect from everyone around you, he was taking care of it. You pushed up into him, pleasure surging through you, broken stutters of his name as he fucked into you, hard and fast, driving deep, and the tip of his cock was pressing to your g-spot each time, pinpoint accuracy as you weren't sure if he even knew that he was making stars flash behind your eyes.

“Joel, don’t stop! I’m so close!”

You moved, licking over two fingers, and making to slip them between your bodies to find your clit, to spur your orgasm on as best you could, but as you moved, he lifted a hand, snatching yours in his own and pinning it to the bed, and a loud moan rippled through you from the dominance he asserted. He seemed almost surprised, for only as second, before his brows were raising. “You liked that, huh? Shoulda’ told me.”

“That’s not general advice, you wanted general advice.”

He shook his head, leaning back down to brush the tip of his nose over your own. “Maybe I’d prefer it if you tailored the advice to yourself specifically. Tell me how to drive you wild.”

“Just keep doing what you’re doing, I like it when you take control of me a little bit.” He nodded his head, seeming to catch on, and he sat back leaving you laying in the bed as the angle changed. Two fingers prodded at your lips, and he raised his brows, waiting for you to draw them into your mouth, wetting the digits thoroughly for him. When he deemed them sufficiently slick, he pulled them back, trailing them down along your body, before pressing down roughly onto the neglected bud between your thighs, crying out for attention to push you over the edge.

As you tumbled into that bliss, he continued going, until your body was jerking and quivering underneath him, and you were crying out his name, clenching so hard around his cock that his head fell back as he gripped at your thigh with his other hand, kneeling between your parted legs and tucked snugly between your spasming walls. “Jeez, you’re so fucking tight.”

He collapsed down over you, sweaty and warm, covering your body with his entirety as he tried to catch his breath, and your eyes were still rolled back in your head, coming back to focus as you slipped back down to earth from the heaven he'd taken you to. “That was incredible.”

“You bet your cute little ass it was.”

You chuckled, feeling him shuffle, pressing a kiss to your shoulder. Locking your knees on either side of his hips, you flipped him over, his eyes wide as he found himself on his back, your hand finding his cock as you sank back down, shivering at the feeling as the aftermath of your last orgasm was still racing through you, and he let out a long and deep sound that vaguely resembled your name, hands finding your waist and pulling you the rest of the way down as he fucked up into you.

“You don’t have to, really-”

“You know, you’re pretty much the first guy I’ve ever been with who didn’t come first, and who genuinely cared about my pleasure.” Your nails scratched over his chest a little, making him shudder at your touch, before you were leaning down, hair drawing around you both, and he stared up at you in awe. “I want to make you feel good, too.”

He nodded, a hand tangling toughly in your hair, and he pulled you backwards, sitting up with you in his lap so that your legs could wrap around his waist more fully, your arms looping his neck, holding you as close as he possibly could. You whined at the feeling of your stinging scalp, loving the way he was manhandling you now, and he knew it too, his lips descending to your throat as he used his other hand to guide the movements of your hips.

“Tell me what to do, I don’t go on top a lot. Tell me what’s good, that’s what you’re supposed to do.” You were pleading with him, desperate to know how you could make him feel as good as you’d made him.

“What you’re doing right now is good.” He mumbled, but as you rolled your hips back down into his with what little space there was, his lips moving over your body until he could lean you back, taking a nipple between his lips and sucking one perky bud into his mouth. You cried out his name, his fist tangled into your hair to hold you still, and you tried to form thoughts, your first attempts at speaking coming out as broken stutters.

“Please, Joel..”

“Please what, gorgeous? Tell me what you need.” He cooed the words out, and you let out a desperate sound, your hips slamming down into his, and your hands found his chest, pushing him back into the bed, hearing the rush of breath he let out.

“Tell me what you want.”

He stared at you, blinking those beautiful brown eyes for a second, before giving in. “Honestly, I just want you to ride me like a pornstar. Go fucking wild, it’s so fucking sexy. When your tits bounce, and you slam yourself onto my cock, hair messy and a little sweaty, that's what I want.”

You nodded, swallowing thickly and bracing yourself on his chest, before you moved more solidly onto your knees, beginning to bounce against him. His jaw dropped, watching the movements of your chest, watching as you leaned back to show off the bouncing of your breasts before him as you built your confidence, and after getting past your anxieties, you were faced with the raging build of confidence that came with being on top.

He was staring at you like you’d put the lights in the sky, and you were, for once, glad that there were lights on to see him and for him to see you, to watch every movement you were making, because pure thrill was written on his face, adoration and lust as he stared, before you were taking one of his hands. Dragging it over your body, you sealed his fingers around one of your tits, pushing into his hands when he took control, fingers tweaking with your nipples, and he raised the other to do that same.

You were close, and you could tell he was too, the breathless way that he was beginning to chant your name on repeat, the way you were sure that the feeling of his cock tapping against every spot within you was going to be burned into your mind for the rest of your life, and the look on his face as he finally neared that peak.

“You look so fucking good. Taking what you want, riding me, absolutely perfect up there.”

“Only because that's how you want to see me, right now.” You whispered, and he shook his head, his hands finding your hips, waiting for you to lift yourself up, and as you did, he slammed you back down onto him, meeting you as he fucked up into you, and your body fell forwards in shock, barely catching yourself before your forehead hit his own, breath shared between you once again. His feet adjusted on the bed, bending at the knee to sit flat and he set a brutal pace, driving the both of you towards your final peak and he drilled into you.

Your eyes crossed, vision spotting, and a scream of his name was torn from you with force as you crashed into yet another earth-shattering orgasm at his touch, the sound of his cries of complete joy seeming muffled as he chased after you over the cliff, falling into orgasmic bliss. He rode the pair of you out, strained and weakening movements as your bodies trembled together, until finally, he stopped, completely sent off all energy, and you collapsed against his chest.

His heart was thudding against his chest under your cheek, your nails scratching lightly at the patch of dark hairs between lightly defined pecs, and he wrapped his arms around you. Rolling you to the side, he was reluctant to leave the bed, letting out a loud sound of distaste ta having to do so, but didn’t travel far, simply far enough to undo the rubber on his cock and tie it up, wrapping it in some tissues and dropping the crumpled heap into the bin.

When he came back over, he lay down beside you on his back, one hand under his head and the other stretched out towards you. As you lay on your stomach, shuffling closer to him, you lifted yourself onto your elbows, peering down at him with a small smile. “So, that was, like, the best sex ever. Right?”

You grinned, head ducking to hide the bashful expression you wore, but you were laughing nonetheless. “Ever.”

“I wish all girls were as cool as you. Like, sex would just be so much better if everyone just had that kind of communication, because, holy shit, that was mindblowing.” His hand came up beside his head, making an exploding noise as his fingers made the motion, as though his head really had exploded, and you grinned, feeling his fingers brush over your skin as he lowered it back down.

Quiet fell between you both, but it was comfortable, nice and easy-going, and you weren’t sure how to break the silence now, but neither was he, though it didn’t matter. When the temperatures that had risen in your body during your sinful act began to come back down, you found yourself cold once again, tucking yourself under the blankets and curling in a little closer to him, fingers brushing through his hair to distract yourself as he lay, staring up at you.

“Y’know, you said something, during it all..”

“You told me to give you advice! Don’t get pissy about it now.” Your joke was taken in good spirits, a loud laugh leaving him, and the burning gaze he’d mixed you with was broken for a few moments as his eyes closed to revel in his amusement, but when the laughter died down, he was looking at you again, with just as much intensity.

“Not that. You said you only thought you only looked good because I wanted you to look good.” His hand found your cheek, forcing you to find his gaze as he spoke. “That wasn’t true. You’re so fucking beautiful, and just because one dumbass broke your heart, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t think of yourself as not being worthy. It only leads to more heartbreak. Don’t let his stupid actions take away from your value.”

“You know, you’re real wise on all this stuff.” His thumb brushed over your lips, and you puckered your lips to press a kiss to the pad of the finger. “Who broke your heart, Joel?”

“What makes you think I’ve had my heart broken?”

“Takes one to know one.” You whispered, and he let out a little sigh, gaze trailing off to stare at the ceiling.

“Her name was Aimee. We were together in high-school. We got into different colleges, and I was so sure we could make a long-distance thing work.” You cringed a little, keeping it internal, already guessing where this was going, but letting him talk. “We did phone calls and video chats, and I went to see her so often, every chance I could, in first year. But then second year came, and everything got busy, and I didn’t get to see her as often as I would’ve liked. I was waiting for the summer break to go and see her. When I got there, things were different, she told me it had changed, that she’d fallen for someone else and just didn’t know how to tell me. She figured we’d just fizzle out, that we had been fading. We broke up officially, but, it didn’t hurt her as much as it hurt me.”

“I’m so sorry, Joel.”

“That’s alright.” He murmured, fingers tracing up and down your arm, and you settled into a comfortable quiet once again.

You were hesitant to admit it to yourself, but you were growing rather fond of the man, your hookup having become so much more. The snow, the cold weather, two broken hearts and a stupid hook up site, and suddenly, you’d found someone who had managed to change your life in a lot of little ways, all in just twenty-four hours.

You turned, finding the man already watching you, lips curled up in a sweet smile and eyes lazily drooped, simply watching you as the thoughts and feelings raced through your mind, and yet, under his gaze, they all seemed to go silent. The worries, the constant surge of ‘what ifs’ and ‘maybes’ all faded away, and you reached out a finger, tapping at the tip of his nose.

His expression somehow managed to morph into something even sweeter, practically giving you a toothache as his nose scrunched up adorably, before he was folding both hands under his head, moving to tangle his legs with yours, and simply sighing a little.

Golden and low lighting made his features seemed a little sharper, shadows on his face highlighting his jaw, cheekbones standing prominent and hair darker, and you knew just how soft it was, strands pushed back out of his face by you. The dark mark on his neck was making itself known now, and you were sure your own body would soon be littered in them, and you would check them all out with pride in the morning.

You turned to look at him again, drawing yourself back out of the spiral in your mind you’d once again fallen victim to, and meeting his gaze with a heatless huff. “What are you staring at?”

“Just.. you.” His brows pulled together a little, eyes sweeping across your face again in a way that made you feel raw and on the edge of your emotions. He lifted a hand, pushing your hair away behind your ears, before settling a hand over your jaw, and stroking his thumb across your skin slowly and soothingly.

“Yeah, well, don’t.” You whispered, voice cracking, and your gaze left his, but his touch never fell away, even when you tried to duck your head. “Don’t look at me like that, not unless you plan to act on it.”

“Oh, I would love to act on it. When this snow melts, I’d like to act on it properly.”

“Like.. a date?” You questioned, eyes flicking up to his for only a moment, and he was beaming what you did, toothy smile showing off his joy for only you to see.

“Exactly like a date, if you’ll have me?”

“Depends.” You murmured, shuffling in closer to him for warmth. “Can I share the bed with you tonight, or are you kicking me back out to the couch?”

He wrapped you up in his arms, pulling you down into his chest as the pair of you laughed, cocooning yourselves in the blankets with a series of rolls and twists, until you pressed up tightly together and locked in such a way. “There, now you’re not going anywhere.” He dipped down, pressing a kiss to your lips, one that you were eager to reciprocate. “Me and the bed are all yours, gorgeous.”

“I like the sound of that.”

[anxious2dsimp]

Reki, Miya and langa from sk8 ☁️♀

Hi anon! Thank you for requesting Sk8, I've been waiting for this one, turn it up >:) Since you didn't specify theme or format I'm just gonna write a random fluffy drabble for each!

Random Fluffy Drables! | Reki, Langa, & Platonic!Miya

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Pairings: Reki x Reader, Langa x Reader, Platonic!Miya & Reader

Flavor: Fluff ☁️

Reader: Fem!Reader (she/her)

Format: Drabbles

Warnings: None!

A/N: I decided Miya's is gonna be platonic bc I feel comfortable writting about him that way, sorry!

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Reki

If there's two things that are consistent about Reki is that he loves skateboarding more than anything and he's great at it. How you managed to change those two main things about the redhead not even a minute into meeting him is truly baffling. It was a sunny afternoon when Reki was aimlessly riding his skateboard around town, his eyes drifting around the relatively busy store-filled street. That was, until you came out of one of the buildings a couple stores ahead, because once he spotted you he couldn't look away. You were putting on your headphones, brushing the hair out of your face to reveal the prettiest girl he'd ever seen, features graced by the warm sunlight as your eyes were lost somewhere among the clouds. A million thoughts raced through his mind; would it be creepy to approach you, there's no way you'd notice him, maybe he could impress you with a cool trick? Unfortunately for him he had nearly caught up to you and couldn't make up his mind, but suddenly he snapped out of his thoughts by a thunk and a force propelling him forward. He was so busy looking at you he didn't notice the uneven sidewalk, his front wheels getting stuck and sending him flying only to land in front of you. "Oh my god, are you ok?" You asked worriedly as you crouched down before the stranger that had been catapulted by his board. "I- uh- hi?" Reki sounded more panicked than you were, and mentally kicked himself for being such an idiot, but the sound of your stiffled laugh made him stop that line of thought in an instant. "Hi, please tell me you're ok, or else I should really stop laughing," you commented wittily as you offered him your hand. "No, it's fine! I'm fine, you can keep laughing, it sounds so pretty you're making me feel better," Reki confessed as he took your hand and brought himself up, dusting his jeans before his cheeks begun burning a darker shade of red when he lifted his gaze to meet your flustered face. Did he really just say that outloud? He must have hit his head hard then. "Thanks! I'm (y/n), and you are?" God, you're smile was making his heart race more than S. "Reki," he said, probably a little to quickly, but at that point he didn't care. "Well, Reki, you should probably be more careful when you're skating," you teased, silently hoping your conversation didn't end there and he was as intrigued in you as you were in him. Little did you know that he would try his best to get to see you again, because in that brief interaction, you had transformed his world and what he thought he knew.

Langa

"Langa! you were amazing out there," you exclaimed breathily as you jumped into your friend's arms after him winning the S race. The pale boy squeezed you in response and thanked you, his smile still ecstatic from all the adrenaline. "We've been friends for so long, I can't believe this is the first race you ever invite me to," you said once he put you down, only half joking. "To be fair, S is kind of dangerous, but it surprises me too," Langa said truthfully, but before you could reply you heard some new voices behind you. "Who's the new slime?" "Langa brought a girl, he's learning from me!" "Well this is unprecedented." You whirled around to find a black-haired middle schooler, and three rather unique looking adults. Not really knowing what to reply, you were lucky your other friend Reki made his way past them and introduced you in the process. "This is (y/n), Langa and I's friend from school," the redhead said proudly. After they introduced themselves, you made some small talk with the group, but had to excuse yourself to reply to a phonecall. "So, Snow, what's up with you two?" Joe asked as he wiggled his brows. "What do you mean?" Langa replied, clueless as ever as everyone else stared in disbelief. "We mean that this is the first person you invite to S, and whenever you look at her your eyes sparkle like you're talking about skateboarding," Cherry attempted to clarify. "Or how during the race you pulverized the guy who was hitting on her earlier," Shadow chimed in once he saw Langa was still not getting it. "They're asking if you like her bro," Reki said with a rowdy smile as Langa turned totally red at the suggestion. "Wha- I care for her as a friend! Right? That's what friends do?" Langa didn't know why he was getting defensive, but he felt that his heart was gonna explode if they didn't change the subject. "Well, your slime buddy is getting hit on again," Miya said, slightly amused as he pointed with his head. Langa's body moved before he could even tell, and next thing he knew he was standing beside you as he silently glared at the guy he won against. "I'm sorry," the guy who was now clearly uncomfortable said as he lifted his arms in fake surrender, "I should have known you two were together." You just became a flustered mess, watching the guy leave as you turned to face your friend, stoic as ever but with a faint pink dusting his cheeks. "What was that about?" You asked. "You looked uncomfortable," he stated simply as he grabbed your arm, softly dragging you back to the group, who were all smiling knowingly. "Also, I wouldn't oppose to it y'know," his voice was barely above a whisper, but you were sure you heard him right, the sound of your heartbeat filling your ears immediately after. That night definitely was important for your relationship, just not in the "friendly" way you both initially thought.

Miya

Miya's gaze fell to the floor as his name was called to come up front for the freestyle skateboarding competition he was at. You had promised to come see him and support him like the good friend you were, but had yet to show up, leading the boy grit his teeth to bear the dissapointment that weighed him down. 'Of course (y/n) wouldn't show up, she's another slime, I should have known I'm stuck in a single player game,' Miya thought to himself as he walked up to the center of the area, readjusting his helmet while turning to face the judges. He was so caught up in his head that he didn't notice the commotion going on in the corner, where amongst the crowd whispered complains were heard followed by a seemingly neverending loop of apologies. Out of breath and hoping you weren't late you finally managed to squeeze past the group to end up in the front row before the area, seeing that much to your delight Miya had yet to start. However, your content smile at having made it in time despite your setbacks quickly vanished at the sight of his frown. Did he think you had forgotten? "MIYA! GOOD LUCK!" You yelled over the loudspeaker music and monotone sound of conversation from the crowd, the blackette's eyes instantly lighting up at the familiar voice. His eyes finally landed on you, and you could visibly tell he was holding back from grinning too hard as he gave you a small nod of acknowledgement; I'm glad you made it. After a great routine, he got off the judging area and headed to the water fountains, where you two had previously scheduled to meet. "I'm so sorry I was late, I had some problems that held me back, but I'm glad I made it on time! You were great out there," you rambled to your friend as he took a swig from his water bottle. "It's whatever," he replied contently, yet you knew something was up with the way his eyes avoided yours. "Miya, I can tell something's bothering you, y'know." After a hesitant glance, the boy sighed and finally looked you in the eye. "Sorry, it's just... I was scared you were gonna ditch me," he confessed, adding in a voice barely above a whisper, "like my old friends." Your heart broke at his words; though he kept up this unbothered facade, he did care for all of this stuff on the inside. "I would never, Miya. You're a great friend, and you deserve nothing less from me," you reassured him, giving him a tight hug that he barely reciprocated, but you knew him well enough to see that he appreciated it from the look in his eyes. "You better keep your word, or else you'd go down from being a friend-slime to a regular one," he joked, earning a lighthearted chuckle from both of you as the sadness cleared from the air around you two.

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[infinitegalahad]

HOW TO SAY I LOVE YOU (WITHOUT SAYING I LOVE YOU)

Summary: Everybody in Easy Company can see that Shifty is like a love-sick puppy with a cute truck driver. He loves her, but he's too shy to confess. Popeye, his best friend, can no longer stand to see it. Floyd Talbert is the man of the hour and knows how to get Shifty, who can barely say I love you", to say those three words without actually saying the words. The way to solve this pining? A classic carnival date.

Word-Count: 7.4k

Notes: Howdy y'all! Once again, I am back from the dead! School has been a little crazy lately. I'm still working on requests and opening up some prompts, but I have two essays that are due in a month and aka-my life is a mess but...writing. I hope you guys will forgive me for dying and take this tooth rotting fluff of Shifty and cheeky tab! Shifty basically has a phd in being adorable. It's pure fluff, not a single ounce of angst! Once again, fem reader. Also unbeta read, we die like idiots. Enjoy!

Taglist: @tvserie-s-world @easy-company-tradition @liebgotttme @50svibes (add yourself to my taglist)

“Oh, it’s hopeless!” Popeye sighed, his face landing into his hands. It had gone on for too long. At that point, it was sickening to watch Shifty. As much as Popeye loved him, he couldn’t stand to watch him attempt flirting, or whatever he was doing with his crush. Something had to be done, and the infamous playboy Floyd Talbert was the perfect person for the job.

Floyd had a smirk sprawled across his face as he looked behind Popeye, seeing the interaction blossom between Shifty and his crush. Shifty towered over them, shining his pearly whites and saying something inaudible, earning a sweet chuckle. His sun tanned cheeks turned tomato red as he rubbed his nape.

“I love Shifty, but that poor boy doesn’t even know he’s in love with her.” Floyd remarked. Being a serial dater, he knew how to charm people, with his dashing looks and personality. Floyd studied the Virginian, struggling to hide his obvious affections. His bright smiles, rosy cheeks, spotting them within the crowds-the boy was enamored with her.

Not only was Shifty in love, but so was y/n. Shifty and y/n were both quiet, and shy people. They were adored by the company as being the nicest people alive. You were a truck driver assigned to the company in Aldbourne. Being the only girl donned in pants, the men of easy company were both intimidated and intrigued with you. When you weren’t driving trucks, you were either subjected to Floyd’s advances or the mortar trio attempting to flex their muscles. Y/n eventually eased her way into the company, becoming “Easy’s girl”. Even though you felt welcomed, you didn’t really have a friend you could rely on.

That was until you met Shifty Powers. You met him by accidentally running into him with a box full of mountains. He, being the kind soul he was, offered to help you reorder the thousands of bullets. In exchange, you offered him a ride to a location he was running late to. He introduced himself by Darrell, insisting that you called him by his real name with a smile on his face. He was an undeniable gorogues with sun tanned skin, a smile to die for, and chocolate hair that was golden in the sun. Not only was he attractive on the outside, but within. You were convinced that Shifty could do no wrong whatsoever. Heck, you also believed that he was legally not allowed to curse.

Ever since that encounter, you and Shifty had begun to hang out more. The two of you would talk for hours on end, explore the town of Albourne, escape the bars and find a little bookshop or peaceful space to talk. It was soothing to sit next to Shifty and simply hear him breathe, talk, or smile. It always makes your bleak world a tad bit better. But you were convinced that Shifty wasn’t interested in you, he was too innocent. So you decided that the farthest you would be is friends. And yet, it didn’t sit well with you.

Floyd had noticed that y/n was in love herself. Whenever she was around Shifty, she’d become a mess as well, being clumsy and blushing red. She’d twist a strand of hair in her fingers every time Shifty looked at her, batted her long eyelashes, and looked in the distance to find Shifty, intent on his target, letting out a dreamt sigh.

Floyd was in love with y/n. After all, it was rare to find a female in a company full of men. However, Floyd was Shifty’s best friend, and he wanted what was best for both of them. Popeye could see this too and he was sick of seeing two people who didn’t even know what they were in love with each other.

Floyd, Chuck, and Popeye watched Shifty and you say something to each other. It was pouring outside. Attempting to find your rain jacket, it was nowhere in sight. Shifty, seeing your frustration, took off his jacket and gently put it on your shoulders. You turned around and tried taking it off, but Shifty insisted that you stay warm.

“My pa’ always made sure my ma’ would stay warm. It’s the best I can do,” He reassured.

“Oh Shifty, thank you. This is too kind. How can I repay you?” You offered, wrapping the jacket around your body.

He shook his head, smiling, “I don’t need a single thing from you, miss y/n.”

“Boy, the world truly doesn’t deserve someone like you.” You stated, standing on your tippy toes. “Let’s get out of here so I can sneak you a Hershey bar, or two. How does that sound?”

Shifty froze and looked side to side. It felt like the devil was tempting him. But he could never see y/n as a devil. She was a beautiful angel in his eyes.

“Well,” Shifty put a finger to his lips, “That does sound mighty fine, Miss y/n.”

You took his hand and dragged him to the door, your laughter echoing in the door. Shifty held the door open and let you exit first before closing the door, making your way to the supply room to eat chocolate.

Once Shifty was out of sight, Popeye turned back to Floyd. “I’ve tried to ask him, trust me. He won't say a dang word on it.” He explained, “He thinks miss y/n wouldn’t like a fellow like him. But I’m pretty sure she loves him.”

“You kidding?” Chuck added on, “She spoils him with free food, contraband, whatever. Anything he wants, he gets. She doesn’t do that to any of us.”

“Well, miss Y/n did give me hershey bar last week,” Floyd proudly smirked.

Chuck looked unashamed, “Yeah, because you were trying to convince her to go to the amusement park with her this weekend.”

The Boy from Kokomo playfully rolled his eyes, “Shifty’s not her only favorite.” For a second, he froze, a thought finally coming in his mind. “Wait...the amusement park…”

“She already said no to that one, and all the other dates,” Chuck said.

“I know that,” Floyd replied, rubbing his chin, “I got an idea. For Shifty and Miss y/n.”

Chuck and Popeye looked at eachother, and then Floyd. They could already see the idea forming, but it would take a lot of work.

“I’ve known Shifty all my life. He’s too shy to ask a girl out,” Popeye acknowledged, “He’s too scared of being rejected.”

“I know that.” Floyd pointed his finger as he stood up and fixed his belt, “I’ve got a plan.”

“For once?”

“Yes-be quiet,” Floyd teased, “All those two need is a little push.”

-----------

Shifty looked up and down at the brightly colored paper and at y/n, who was loading up the back of a supply truck. His mouth hung open as his eyebrows rose in diseablief.

Floyd, Chuck, and Popeye stood all in front of him, waiting for an answer. Shifty shook his head and shoved the paper back in Floyd’s hands.

“Oh, I can’t do that. No way.” Shifty denied, his cheeks growing red.

Popeye let out a defeated sigh as Floyd clicked his mouth, walking up to Shifty. “Yes way! Have you not seen the way y/n looks at you?”

Shifty looked in the distance and then back at Floyd, “What? No! She looks at me like I look at you-like a friend. Besides, you’ve seen miss y/n,” Shifty’s gaze turned back to you as the butterflies fluttered in his stomach, “She made it clear ‘dat she ‘dun needa’ man, and I wanna respect ‘dat wish. ‘Sides, she wouldn’t be into a guy like me.”

Popeye shook his head, “God darn it Shift! You gotta realize dat your-”

“In love. L-O-V-E.” Floyd teased, budding shoulders with Shifty. “Based on the dames I’ve been with in Kokomo, I know how women work. She looks at you like a lovesick puppy. The two of you are meant for eachother.”

Shifty looked at Floyd, blinking his eyes like a child looking at a math equation. He still wasn’t understanding. “But...oh, leapin’ lizards! Miss y/n would be into a guy like you. You get all ‘da pretty ladies...how do you dewit?”

Upon hearing Shifty’s pleas for help, Floyd let out a chuckle and slapped Shifty’s shoulder, who looked like a lost lovesick puppy.

“Shifty, Shift, my dearest friend,” Floyd reassured, giving him a double pat, “That’s why I’m here. You’re getting the best advice from your best man.”

Chuck rolled his eyes, “Fan-fucking-tastic Shifty, you boosted his ego. This is going to be great.”

Floyd looked at an unassumed Chuck, giving him a pout. “Oh come now, Chuck! Look at him, he’s in love.”

“But you like Miss y/n! I don’t wanna steal her. I mean, I want someone who can treat her right,” Shifty said, resting his hands on his cheeks.

“Shifty, as your friend, I’m pretty sure everybody in easy company wants Miss y/n to accompany them at the bar for a dance or two.” Floyd explained, trying to encourage Shifty. “I know how much you love her, and I think it’s fair to give you a shot. The only way you’ll get what you want is by working for it.”

He saw Joe Toye walk by you. And even Joe Toye, one of the scariest people in the company, gave miss y/n a subtle nod. She smiled back and gave him a wave, a bandanna in your hair and dirt smudged on your cheek.

Just your mere presence made Shifty melt like an ice cream cone on a hot summer’s day. No matter what you were in, your uniform or covered in pig guts, you always found a way to be absolutely gorgeous. When Shifty had first bumped into you, he was convinced you were a fallen angel. You were too beautiful and bright in the rainy, gloomy Albourne. Yet there you were, always by his side with a smile on your face and story to tell.

Shifty let out a dreamy smile, a crooked smile on his face. “I wanna say I love her…” Shifty added on.``...without sayin’ I love her.”

The boy from Kokomo cracked his knuckles, “Well, don’t I just got the plan for you too. How does nice and slow sound?”

----------

“What are you doin? Stop pushin’ me! I can’t dewit!” Shifty whispered in a hush as Floyd and Popeye pushed him towards the truck where you were loading supplies for easy company.

“Boy, quit being afraid of anything. Take that leap of faith!” Floyd called out before pushing Shifty near the truck before he and Popeye hid for cover.

Shifty turned around to find them before he heard a familiar voice call his name.

“Shifty?”

The Virginian sharpshooter turned his shoulder and hid his hands behind his back, smiling with a piece of his golden chestnut hair falling on his forehead. “Miss y/n! Pleasure to see ‘yah. I hope I wasn’t interruptin’ anythin’ too important.”

“Shifty, you’re too sweet. I was just finishing the last load of K-bars…” You explained, lifting a large box and shoving it into the back of her full truck, unable to see. Finally, done after a long day. Wiping the sweat off of your forehead, you walked towards Shifty only to be greeted by a variety of poppies.

“ ‘ere, got ‘em for you. You said you like the color red…” Shifty blushed, looking to the side. Floyd and Popeye hid behind the side of the truck, giving him a thumbs up.

You took the flowers and examined them, a smile growing on your face. “Oh, these are so sweet! Thank you..” You put the flowers in the pocket of your overalls to retrieve a few hershey bars from the back of the truck, “I’ll getcha’ somethin-”

“Wait, miss y/n!” Shifty announced, following after you as he grabbed your soft hand, pulling you back. You tripped on your own feet, almost falling to the ground before Shifty catched you, his hand on the small of your back. The two of you stared at each other, cheeks both burning with desire.

Shifty coughed and lifted you up, neating your ruffled shirt and cap with your hair messily tucked into. “S-sorry, I…would like to ask you somethin’. Not chocolate, ma’am.”

You raised your eyebrows, insisting that he go forward with his response, his hand still in yours. He didn’t even notice, but you did. You could recognize his soft, tan skin from anywhere.

“Would you go to the amusement park with me? As my date?” Shifty blurted out like word vomit, “I mean, only if you want. If you don’t wanna go with somebody like me, then I understand.”

“Yes, of course I would!” You also blurted out, your face red like a tomato. You took your cap off and hid your face, embarrassed by yourself. Inhaling, you let out an exhale before pulling yourself together. “Shifty, I would love to go with you. I wasn’t even planning on going at all until you asked me.”

Shifty’s eyes sprinkled with happiness, like a child on Christmas morning. “Really? You wanna?” He squeezed your hand, realizing that he was still holding it.

You looked up at him with a warm smile, placing your dirty hand on top of his. “Yes, I would love to.”

Shifty looked speechless. The rumors were true; his smile was infectious. Perfect and bright like the sun of a warm summer day.

“Sufferin’ succotash!” He cried, “Miss y/n? Can I ask you one last thing?”

“Yes, Shifty?”

“Can I give you a hug?”

It was definitely not what you were expecting. But then again, you weren’t hesitant. Shifty could do no wrong-he simply seemed over the moon about asking you out. You were as well, but seeing Shifty’s excitement made you smile and accept it. He was too cute for his own food.

“Yes, you can.” You opened your arms only to have long hands pull you up and spin you around. It was a quick welcome as you spun around, heartfelt laughter escaping from you and Shifty. Shifty could do no wrong, whether that be at shooting or giving the best bear hugs. They were bear-like, but affectionate and protective. He trapped his arms around your waist as you held the back of his necks, your fingers tangled in his soft hair which shined in the sun. Shifty looked amazing no matter what, always glowing.

Babe threw the clown nose off of his face along with the roses Guarnere had picked out for him. Eugene was walking by, mortified to see Babe dressed (apparently) as a clown and a disappointed Guarnere. Not an unusual sight.

“Heffron,” Eugene walked towards a sad Babe, scanning his figure. “What are you doing…”

“I’m heartbroken! Look at them!” Babe mourned, pointing at you and Shifty in an embrace, happily giggling. “I was gonna ask miss y/n out and give her these roses. I dressed up like a clown since I thought we could both be clowns together.”

Eugene simply blinked, perplexed by Babe’s logic. All he could think of was the word Yikes. He would’ve most likely scared away y/n instead of winning her heart over. “Pardon?” He looked at Guarnere for answers, who simply shrugged at him.

“Don’t look at me like that. I tried, the kid wouldn’t listen. He’s a lovesick puppy with that damn dame.” Guarnere explained, crossing his arms as he looked at the happy couple.

The Cajun medic, along with Babe the sad clown and Guarnere, observed you and Shifty. A small smile crooked at his lips. He normally wasn’t one for gossip or dating, but he was happy for the two of you. Even someone as quiet as him didn’t deny the obvious chemistry between the two of you. It was like the two you were destined to be together. Humble, adored, and both beautiful in your own, respective rights.

“Yeah…” Eugene slowly bopped his head, “There sure like lovesick puppies…”

-----------

The Carnival brought light into the gloomy Alborunte with it’s bright rides, laughing children, and joyful ambience. Shifty could recall his childhood with Popeye. Every year, they’d have a carnival during the dog days of August. He loved the shooting games, winning thousands of plushies and eating candy with Popeye until he was sick. He was sure his Ma still had the plushies tucked away in the attic.

But instead of feeling overjoyed, he felt like he was walking on eggshells.

He waited at the entrance with Floyd, Popeye, and Chuck. Chuck kept looking down at his watch, keeping lookout for y/n as Floyd gave Shifty a final pep talk. They were all dressed in fresh uniforms with showers and fine cologne. It was a refreshing change, even if it was for one night.

“Remember, play it cool. You’re sweating’ like a damn dog!” Floyd said, fixing a stubborn curl into his cap.

“Oh, I don’t think I can do this. I mean, miss y/n deserves a real man. I mean she’s so…” Shifty rambled on before Popeye swatted him on the shoulder, gardening his attention to y/n in the crowd. You were far away but to Shifty, you were still recognizable. The girls in the crowd wore plain and monotone colored dresses but you wore a beautiful floral button up with sheer sleeves and ruffles, your makeup done. It was the first time Shifty had ever seen you without your flap cap and dirt on your face, and he wanted a better look.

“Beautiful…”

Floyd smirked and patted Shifty’s shoulders, letting out a dreamy sigh, “God damn it Shifty, you’re lucky I’m being nice to you. Hottie on the dot. Go get ‘em, tiger.”

Giving him a push on encouragement, Shifty’s friends eventually faded into the crowd. Gulping, he began to walk forward towards y/n, who stood in the crowd, waiting in the exact location Shifty told her to wait in. Catching him the corner of his eye, she smiled with her red lips and walked over.

“Shifty!” Y/n exclaimed with glee, looking at his clean uniform and quivering an eyebrow. “Thank goddess I found you…and you look handsome in your uniform.”

“Says the pretty lady talkin’,'' Shifty commented back as he looked down at your tinier form. Now that you were up close, he could admire every little detail from your rosy cheeks, red lipstick, manicured hands, and glimmer in your eyes from the fairy lights. “I mean, you always look very nice but tonight you look stunning’.”

“Oh quit being’ nice to me, Shifty.” You playfully swatted his shoulder, “Every guy’s in the company’s said that to me. Not half of them even acknowledged me before I got dressed up.”

Shifty, like a confused puppy, tilted his head. How could someone such as y/n, who he considered to be the prettiest lady he had ever seen.

“Whaddya mean? You always have been very pretty, ma’am.” Shifty acknowledged, his hands fiddling behind his back. He could feel his palms sweating, seeing the moon reflect onto your glowing skin. “You always look beautiful. It’s just tonight that you look even more beautiful than you usually do.”

You shook your head as you looked down, fiddling with the sides of your dress. Nobody had said those words to you in years. They were truly heartfelt and not some cheap way of getting into your pants. “I may not see it, but thank you Shifty.”

“Well, my ma’ has always told me that I’m one bad liar. I like to say it how it is,” Shifty insisted with a finger in your face, “and I’m saying that you are one hecka’ ova’ pretty gal.”

You smiled at Shifty, amazed by how cute he was. He didn’t even have to try, it was all natural. “Oh Shifty….” You looked down at your shoes, seeing your feet brush against his boots. Clearing your throat, you looked up to talk. ‘I…”

Before you could say a word, you could see Floyd Talbetr in the back. He noticed you talking to Shifty and upon seeing you, had a devilish smirk sprawn over his handsome face. You clicked your tongue, shaking your head. “Oh goodness, doesn’t he see I’m on a date?”

Shifty turned around and bit his lip. He gently grabbed your hand. It felt natural in the moment too, his larger work in your pretty manicured hand. “That son of a gun! I’m sorry ‘bout him, miss y/n. ‘Ere, let’s go. I’m sure he’ll find another lady, but not as pretty as you. I mean she would be very pretty, but not the miss y/n typa’ pretty.”

The two of you walked side by side, hands together. You looked at Shifty, raising an eyebrow. “Are you gonna keep callin’ me pretty the whole night?’

Shifty nodded his head like an enthusiastic child, “Like I said, if it’s true, is true.”

---------

Once the two of you escaped the infamous playboy, you and Shifty walked around the amusement park. The two of you had eventually let go of your hands since something had caught your eye, causing you to mindlessly wander. Shifty followed you like a puppy dog, whatever you wanted to do he wanted. Besides, anything with you was time well spent. Carnivals were something he always enjoyed with their bright lights and shiny attractions, especially with a pretty girl he was in love with. He forgot he was in a raging war whenever he looked at you; with your soft smile and calming words. Just for one night, Shifty could escape into his fantasy world with you, which to his surprise was the reality he was currently standing in.

You were full of life in the park, dragging Shifty to every ride, whether it be scary or for toddlers. The two of you first stopped at the Haunted House, which Shifty was terrified to go into. You were scared, but it was the rush of adrenaline driving you. Shifty wanted to impress you, so he held your hand hand for “safe precaution” and walked in front of you. It was adorable to see him jump back at the slightest scares and mumble under his breath an alternative curse word, such as “leapin’ lizards” or “great scott!”

As the two of you exited the haunted house, lost in conversation, the two of you had been jumpscared. Shifty jumped and grabbed your waist, pulling you in for protection. You felt his stomach on your back and his firm grasp on your waist. You looked up and Shifty, who immediately realized what he was doing. The two of you broke into laughter, a few snorts in the middle. Shifty slowly let go of your waist, wanting to hold on longer.

“Sorry miss y/n.” He apologized, bowing his head. “Jus’ got a lil’ scared in the moment. I don’t mean to be a coward.”

“A coward? Nonsense,” You smiled in reassurance and grabbed his hand, “Your no coward to me. Now come on! There’s more rides to go!”

Shifty was distracted by your beauty as you dragged him along. Once again, the two of you trekked around the park. He was lost in your gaze. How did a guy like him end up with a lady such as yourself? It was hard to deny the butterflies in his stomach. He had never dated in the past. Yes, he had crushes, but they never acknowledged his feelings. He’d do anything for his crushes whether to be holding their books, walking them back home, anything for them, yet he never had his feelings returned. He always felt like he was the second choice. But with you, it was different. You were truly his best friend, and he wanted you to know it, but he still had no idea how to say it.

The two of you decided to take a break and ordered a sugary milkshake to boost your energy for another hour of rides. The two of you sat at a small table in the back, watching the happy couples and children in the distance. The waiter had brought over a milkshake, interrupting your peaceful little silence. Shifty wasn’t even looking at the crowds, he was simply staring at you. His long legs brushed against yours until they finessed each other, making his cheeks go red.

He looked down and saw one milkshake with two heart shaped straws. You raised an eyebrow and fiddled with the straw.

“Odd,” You remarked, examining the milkshake, “ I thought we ordered two…”

Shifty raised his head to see Floyd Talbert in the back, a smirk as he winked, two girls leaning on his shoulders giggling. Was he following them this whole time? Wasn’t he too busy with those girls on his shoulders?”

Shifty tilted his head back down and muttered a curse under his breath, “That son ova’ mother trucker…”

“Shift?” You questioned. He looked up at you, to see that you were already taking a drink. “You okay?”

Shifty rubbed the back of his nape, “Yes ma’am. Ma’ apologies.” He looked at the milkshake and your manicured hands holding the cup down. “Hey! Leave a lil’ for both of us.”

You cutelty giggled, “I haven’t had one of these in a while! I can’t help it. After all,”

“Strawberry, it’s the best flavor,” Shifty had said, and you had followed along in his words. The two of your eyes met, both leaned in close to the milkshake. To cut out the awkarenedess, both of you let out chuckles. A small snort emerged from your mouth, in which you soon covered in.

“Sorry,” You mumbled, hand over your mouth. Your chuckles became faint, another snort escaping your mouth, “It’s not very ladylike.”

Shifty looked puzzled, “Whatcha’ mean? What’s not ladylike?”

“My laugh,” You answered, “I always snort. It’s horrible. Whenever I’d laugh, these girls in my school would make fun of it. I can’t really control it, sorry.”

“Why would they laugh at you?” Shifty looked saddened at your insecurity. You were perfect in his eyes. You truly couldn't do anything wrong. “I think your laugh is very pretty, miss y/n.”

“As sweet as you are, you don’t have to lie.”

Shifty scooted up towards you, his hand sliding onto yours. He had a small smile in his face, his thumb caressing the inner part of your hand. “Well, I am bein’ honest. I ain’t a good liar, you know ‘dat. I’m sure ‘dose girls were jealous of you. ‘sides…” Shifty looked down and back at you with his hazel orbs, “I like your laugh a lot, miss y/n. ‘S pretty, ‘jus like you.”

Oh god, It was happening. Whether it was his cuteness, his Virgianian accent, he was luring you in. You looked up at him as your cheeks grew rosy. The two of you sat there, hand on hand, sipping on a milkshake with the lights glowing in the back. You always had the tiniest crush on Shifty, but it had finally hit you like a bus that it wasn’t some tiny schoolgirl crush-but it was truly love.

You had told yourself over and over that the only reason he liked you was because he was nice to you. You were a cheery person, but deep inside, you had been hurt in the past. Always feeling you were the second choice, you shut yourself out from love. Especially in war. Sure, you were friendly towards the men, but you told yourself you wouldn’t grow close to them. If they died, it would be better. As cruel as it sounded, it was kinder to them are you. It was for the better, right?

That fateful day you bumped into Shifty Powers changed your aspect. You were officially stupid with love, sitting there at a bright carnival, hand in hand as you sipped on a milkshake. He was too kind for you and the world you lived in.

“You’re not gonna stop being nice to me, are you?”

“No ma’am.”

----------

After the milkshake incident, you had noticed you clung onto Shifty more. You were a little taken aback when he asked to hug you. Not that you didn’t enjoy it, you truly did, and it was something that infected your thoughts. Your cheeks would go red and you’d cover the lower part of your mouth. Whenever Shifty walked into the room, it felt like the sun was shining in the dreary Albourne. Just looking at him made your IQ drop to single digits.

And Floyd had caught onto it before you had even noticed.

Instead of holding Shifty’s hand, the two of you walked arm and arm, chatting the night away. The two of you exchanged stories of your childhood, home, and how you ended up where you were. He truly was an angel with a bright smile. He wasn’t like other guys you had met who bragged about themselves. Whenever you would compliment him, he’d deny it with his cheeks all red from embarrassment.

“You’re the best shot I’ve ever seen!” You announced, in disbelief. You had seen him practice a few times, and he would hit every target with grace. “You make it look easy.”

“I’m not a good shot,” Shifty doubted, “But Pa was a good shot. The best shot I’ve ever seen. I think you’d like Pa a lot.”

As the two of you walked in the crowd, you noticed a shooting booth in the corner of your eye. It was a classic paladone duck shooting game. You smirked and pulled his arm to the side, “Well, prove it then.”

Shifty let out a sigh and stood straight, saluting like you like you were Sobel, but much less intimidating. “Yes ma’am.”

You saw him stand there, his fingers curled around the trigger and the butt resting against his shoulder. He took a breath and exhaled, and let the bullets blue. Every duck fell to the ground within a matter of seconds. A minute later, Shifty returned with a large stuffed animal and a smile on his face. He handed it to you. It was a tiny, stuffed bear with button airs.

“For you.” He commented, “I wish they had bigger ones. But I can get you more, if you want.”

You looked at the plusive. You felt juvenile, but it was Shifty. Besides, the two of you weren’t in the army in the moment; you were two lovesick puppies, running around a carnival without a care in the world.

“No, this is...perfect.” You held it close to your chest, “I’ll name him Popeye, a good luck charm.”

Shifty had taken you to every booth he could find, effortlessly shot the gates, and won you more stuffed animals. Whenever he’d give you one, you’d smile like a child on christmas. He loved to see you happy, so he kept doing it more and more. In his mind, it repeated like a broken record, “for y/n”. Wherever you went, Shifty went. Whatever you wanted, Shifty wanted. He was truly a lovesick puppy.

After Shifty’s a thousandth win, both of you walked side by side, arms full of plushies. Each of them were named after members of your company. A racoon named Luz, a black cat named Roe, a cub bear named Liebgott, a fox named Babe, a rabbit named Dick, and so many more. You held up a medium sized shark and nudged Shifty’s shoulder.

“Alright, this one?”

Shifty put some thought into it, “Webster. Doesn’t he like sharks?”

You let out a dry chuckle, “Yeah, he won’t shut up about it.”

The two of you giggled until hitting the next booth and running into a familiar playboy and his newest addition bound to be one night stands. Floyd noticed you and Shifty arrived. He crossed his arms and walked over, faking a cough.

“Look at what we have here,” Floyd scanned you and Shifty, the both of you with wide eyes and stuffed animals overflowing in your hands, “Y’know Shift, I’m proud of you. The whole company hates you for it, you lucky son of a gun.”

Shifty softened his eyebrows, “Wait, they hate me? What did I do wrong?”

Seeing Floyd’s cruel teasing, you interrupted the two. “Floyd, don’t be so cruel,” You put a reassuring hand on Shifty’s shoulder, “Don’t listen to him, he’s just being himself.”

Floyd did a fake pout, “Oh, come on hon. All due respects, but Shifty hit the jackpot before me. After all, he doesn’t miss.”

Shifty and you both went as red as tomatoes, looking sideways. Floyd’s armcandy giggled at his comment and playfully slapped him in the chest. He reassured his sweetheart and wrapped an arm around her, pulling her away.

After Floyd had disappeared to do god knows what, Shifty still looked perplexed and concerned. His thoughts were once again racing. Not about the company disliking him, but Floyd’s comment. Even though he and Floyd were best friends, the two of them were different. He was a playboy in the spotlight, and Shifty was in the back, always tagging along. Growing up, Shifty considered himself to have a loving family. He saw the way his pa treated his ma; giving her his coat, bringing her presents, and treating her like she was a queen. Shifty had never been with a lady before, and he considered you his first real one. Twenty years of age and this was his first rendezvous with a girl, he couldn’t believe it. And he wanted to make sure you were loved and not some jackpot, trying to be won like a competition.

“Miss y/n?” Shifty asked, gaining your attention. He cleared this throat, “I just wanted to tell you that I don’t think of you in ‘dat way.”

“In the Floyd way? That’s alotta’ guys, Shifty.”

“Well, I don’t want you to think I’m doin’ this because of him. Since you’re a very pretty lady, a lot of guys wanted to ask you, and be there arm candy. I just wanted to letcha know now that you're not some kinda prize to be won. I hope to god I ain’t makin’ you feel ‘that way.” Shifty exhaled, letting all his words come out like word vomit. They came out so quickie that he didn’t even know what he was saying.

“Shifty, I know you. You’re a sweetheart,” You kindly affirmed, “Any dame would be lucky to get a guy like you. This has been such a wonderful night, so thank you for that.” The two of you were close to each other, your hands hovering against his chest. His uniform looked perfect on him, you didn’t want to mess it up. Your fingers sucked in as they laid at your side, resisting the temptations that were filling your mind. “But, I do have one request.”

“Anything for you, ma’am.” He vowed, letting you take the floor.

“Teach me how to shoot.”

Shifty look behind you at the booth, a shooting gallery, and then back at you. It was an odd request for sure, especially considering the tender moment the two of you shared. “Like here, right now?” He coaxed. Out of the people, him? He was flattered. No lady had ever asked him something such as that.

You nodded, shrugging your shoulders, insisting, “You are the best shot in the world, after all.”

“Alrighty, if you insist.” Shifty grabbed the small of your back as the two of you walked to the booth. Once you were given the prop gun, you placed the butt on your shoulder and closed an eye, the other looking out of the iron sight. Shifty got right behind you, his chest against your back. He leaned on your shoulder and moved your hand to the trigger and bottom while getting a sniff of your perfume. He never missed, but being around you was definitely a distraction.

“Don’t aim for what you're shooting’, aim’ for where you shootin’,” He instructed, your eyes focused on the moving targets. Shifty hadn’t realized he had put a hand on your waits to turn you over slightly. It wasn’t like you minded his gentle touch.

The moving target came up, and with Shifty’s hand upon yours, you pulled the trigger. The bullet hit the middle of the target, slamming to the ground. However, the two of you didn’t stop. Every target that came, you shot and didn’t miss once. While you were focused on the red targets falling to the ground, you could also feel Shifty’s breath on you and his firm grasp on your hips. His fingers were on top of yours and the trigger. Whenever you were to get a target, he’d mutter “ ‘atta girl…” or “aim a lil’ higher, darlin’.” It made you lose focus, making you thankful that Shifty was right by your side. You lowered the gun, his hands still resting on your hips. When the clerk had announced you had won, you shook it off and walked over to claim your one hundredth stuffed animal. Shifty had a pout as you walked away. He truly enjoyed being close to you.

“Hey,” You called, a smile on your face, “Thank you. I’d like to do that again.”

“Shooting’ again?”

“Of course. I’d like to learn how to do it.”

“Oh miss y/n, I’d love to help, but I ain’t a good shot.”

“Stop denying it,” You affirmed, holding his hands in yours, bringing them to your chest. You looked up at him, the fairy lights glimmering in your eyes, “That you’re a bad shot and not a gentleman and that I deserve to be with someone who can treat me right. You are an amazing shot. This night has been amazing. You are someone who can treat me right. I…” Freezing on your words, the butterflies in your stomach crippled you. You knew what you wanted to say, but how could you word it into a coherent sentence. His hands scrunched in your chest as you still held them close, like a child with a stuffed animal.

“Well, stop denying’ you're not pretty'. Because I think you're the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen,” Shifty confessed as he moved closer to your tinier form, “Not only on the outside, but inside. You're kind, always putting others before yourself. You also sneak the company Hershey bars, even though they don’t need them. You're so interesting to talk to, you can just...light up a whole room when you walk inside of it,” Shifty’s cheeks were burning like a fire as he pulled you close to his body, both of your breaths heavy. “I...oh gosh darn it…”

You looked over to the side and turned back to Shifty, “Ferries Wheel.”

“Huh?”

“Let’s go. It’s the last ride of the night before they shut the park.” You exclaimed. Maybe the two of you needed a private place to talk. I love you, it was three simple words. You couldn’t say it and he couldn’t say it. Maybe it would work, maybe it would be a disaster. You had nothing to lose at

this point.

Shifty and you both walked over, seeing that there was no line for the ride. It was late at night. You only had an hour left on your night pass, and you wanted to make sure you used the most of it. What if always lingered in your mind. You knew not to get close to the men in the company, it was for the better. But now, with Shifty holding your hand, it was undeniable.

The two of you boarded onto the small cart, still hand in hand. No words were spoken between you two. You looked at the bright lights, which were getting smaller as you moved upwards. You could feel Shifty’s gaze burn into you. Although the two of you

“Miss y/n?” He broke the silence.

“Yes, Shifty?” You said, turning to look into his Hazel eyes. He smiled and shook his head, using one of his hands to cup the hand he was holding.

“I don’t know how to say this but, I want to be honest with you since we only got a little bit of time to do so. I remember when I first met you and I was speechless, and I still am. I’ve had feelings for you for a long time now but tonight...made me realize them more. It made me realize what a foot I am for not knowing’ sooner. But now, I know. I gotta say it. Miss Y/n, I love you.” Shifty declared, “more than anything in the world. If you don’t like me, ‘dat’s okay. But I can’t hide it anymore. I wanna help you learn how to shoot, I wanna go on more dates with you, I wanna be around you every single day.”

It had finally hit you. You looked at Shifty and chuckled, “You said it. I love you too. I couldn’t find the words for it...but now, I have. I love you, Darrell. ”

You moved to Shifty’s side of the cart and leaned on his shoulder, nuzzling into it as Shifty wrapped an arm around you, pulling you close to his body.

“Have you always loved me?” Shifty questioned, his fingers trailing against your bare arms.

You nodded your head, playing with his fingers. “Since day one. You?”

“Since I first looked at you,” Shifty confessed, “Floyd and Popeye always teased me ‘bout it. I didn’t have the courage to say it before, but they…”

“Helped you. I guess you're not the only one here,” You sighed, just knowing that Floyd had something to do with this. Of course, it made sense for the playboy to make a matchmaker. “I told Luz by accident and you know Luz. Floyd had overheard our conversation and had to include himself. He helped me get a dress and prepare for this all. So yeah, I guess we both liked each other...but we didn’t know it.”

“Well, know we do it. We both love each other,” Shifty said into your hair.

“Yeah…” You looked at the night sky, the stars and moon sparkling. “I like that a lot.”

The cart had stopped on top of the ride. In that moment, you felt on top of the world. Shifty had you in his arms, the temperature wa sprague, the sky was beautiful. It was all coming together now-but there was one missing detail.

Shifty’s arm pulled you in closer before he asked gently, “May I kiss you, miss y/n?”

That was it, the one missing detail. A kiss to wrap up the perfect moment. You turned your body towards him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders. “Yes, you can Shifty. You can do it as many times as you like.”

“Yes Ma’am,” He chuckled like a child. Wrapping his arms on your waist, your lips collided with each other. Your heart began to pound as you felt a desire run from your heart, to my chest, and down toward my inner thighs.

Shifty touched your neck, and the hair as it was moved away nearly gave me the chills. His hands went from the sides of your head and down to your neck, out to your shoulders and down to your hands. He grabbed your hands gently yet firm. You felt safe, he spoke no words. Your heart is about to beat out of your chest as you shut your eyes and took a deep breath out.

Shift kissed my shoulder, and ran his lips on my skin towards my ear, but didn't quite make it that far. It doesn't hurt, it only makes me want more.

Shifty turns you around, and we are facing each other. He stares into my eyes and smiles. Shifty’s two hands grab your left hand as he places your open palm on his heart, and he holds it there. His eyes exude love, protection, security, safety, patience, and respect. You smile and he lets go of your hands, with one hand he runs his fingers through your hair and gently guides your face closer to his, eventually leaning me in to rest my head on his chest.

His other arm wraps around me, and you hope he never lets go.

And in that moment, the world was still. It was you and Shifty, on top of the world.

[now-im-a-belieber]

“what do you think I am? a machine?” + joe liebgott because I love a little more ✨angst✨ in my life please

prompt: “what do you think I am? a machine?”

joseph liebgott x reader

a/n: carrie you literally asked for angst so i can't apologize for this. i hope you don't hate it 😬

══════════════════

It felt like any other day. Your usual work was sorted. The sky was a plain blue. And on your way home you'd barely thought of anything more than how anxious you were to settle in for the evening. 

But when you approached the door of your apartment, the handle wouldn't budge. Joe must've beaten you home, and turned the lock out of habit. He'd done that from time to time.

Only now, when you knocked, he didn't come rushing to the door, fumbling an apology for keeping you out for even a second; like he had the couple times this had happened before.

And when you knocked again, a steel silence remained. A dreary feeling crept into your chest, as you called Joe's name and knocked for a third time.

You could've gone digging for your key. But for some reason, you were overcome by an absolute necessity for Joe to be the one to let you in.

And after a beat, you finally heard his shuffle from just beyond your home's entry. The sounds of Joe's approaching brought relief, but the pause that followed brought your dread back tenfold.

"Joe?" You rang once more, pressing your palm to the door as if you'd be able to feel him from here. To be able to tell he was really there.

"Go home." He responded, his voice sounding from just beyond the closed door, but seeming light-years away.

His announcement confused you. But made sense of your dread, all the same, somehow. You recognized the tone he used. The meaning behind his very strange words.  It must've been another bad night...

"What?" You nearly laughed. You were home. You were trying to get in as he spoke. 

"Go home," Joe repeated, almost desperately. "Go...  Stay with your ma. Tell her... You... Tell her anything. Or with a friend-"

"Joseph." You rang, frustrated. "What's all this about, huh?"

He didn't respond as you jiggled the handle and swallowed the swell of your worriedly beating heart.

"Open the door." You called, still trying the handle as you tried to piece together why he'd said what he said. And what to respond in turn with, once you could look in his eyes and emphasize a handful of promises.

The quiet lingering from Joe's end was heavy and maddening. But you knew better than to let it drive you so quickly and uselessly vexed.

It was finally after you repeated yourself in the calmest way you knew possible, using his full name for good measure, did anything start to happen.

The sound of your man scuffling closer yet. His distant grumbling. The sound of the lock clicking. You let out a bated breath, and reached back for the handle, silently rejoicing as it turned in your grasp.

He wasn't just beyond the door when you opened it. Joe had made his way toward the sofa, anxiously leaning on its arm, his fingers drumming against the velvet.

"What do you want, Joe?" You wondered. Dropping your things near the coat rack and slowly approaching the man you loved, watching his eyes stay on the floor near his feet as you spoke.

"A day off? Hell, we can stay here all weekend." You offered, searching his face for softening or disdain at your offer. "Or do you wanna get away? We can book a room someplace we've never heard of."

You stalled a step away as you wrapped up your sentence. And no sooner than you had, did Joe burst forth a response.

"No, it doesn't fucking matter what I want." He spoke harshly, pushing away from the sofa. You decidedly took the spot he'd just left, watching his steps toward the wall, and then back toward you in a half hearted pace.

"Of course it does," You reminded, gently. There was no use in you both shouting.

He started to protest again, but let you go on,

"If you need something, Joe, then we'll make it happen."

It was as simple as that, in your eyes. He could kick and scream and you'd let him. And then you'd stand by until an offer stuck, and you'd care for him through it. You'd been prepared to do just that, since before he ever had such miserable reasons to lose his cool on otherwise perfectly passing days.

"You don't understand." He pointed. Turning his head as if trying to search for how better to explain himself. And then he went on to do just that...

"What do you think I am? A machine?" He spat. "Getting out of bed and getting dressed and living my life won't make a difference. Whether I waste a week staring at the fucking wall or dive headfirst back into living like I used to, shaking hands at God forsaken work parties, I'll still be fucked up and there's no changing that."

You listened, stood in half shock. It was like Joe to get worked up, and to spin off on some tangent. But he only ever lost his cool at things that didn't seem to really matter.

Small happenings would cause the bottle he stored his anger in, to finally topple over. Those tiny, final straws added up and until Joe finally snapped under the weight of the pile, and let off some steam.

So you weren't surprised to watch the man you loved spiral into a mess of bittered words.

But you were taken aback completely now, because it was unlike him to speak so honestly. So plainly. Not to say he was some kind of liar. He just never so directly acknowledged his issues as he stood doing now.

"And you deserve better." Joe's tone shifted to a waver more pitiful, as you took in the matter at hand, watching his every move. "You won't even fucking yell back! Because you are better. You gotta get out of here-"

"Shut. Up." You calmly but sternly demanded, standing more upright to meet him across the room. Now that his words had been halted, Joe's emotions began to twist his expression and break your heart.

He turned away from you, as you reached for his shoulders, gently calling his name. Joe feebly resisted your pulling him closer, mumbling something about how you deserved better over and over. Whispering something about how he was barely good enough for you before; and how he'd never be, now.

All the while you pulled him near. You wrapped your arms around his neck and held him against you while his mumbles turned to sniffles. You held him tight, until he finally let his fingers curl around your sides, and held you too.

"Sorry to say I'm not goin' any place, unless you're goin' too." You spoke, just loud enough for Joe to hear as he relaxed more into your hold. "Even if you think you're all fucked up," you went on, watching as Joe pushed himself from you so his eyes could find yours.

"Why?" Joe asked, confounded more than you'd seen any man. He looked like a boy trying to work out an equation on a blackboard too far from his face. His expression, so honest and bemused you couldn't help but let out a quiet laugh.

Your chuckles only caused his brows to push closer together. So with the slight shake of your head, you pulled his face closer with both hands and kissed his mused hair, and offered to make some tea.

You'd been anxious all day to make it home and to finally relax.  To sit in the quiet of the safest space you knew, next to the man you loved. The pair of you could go on spending that time figuring what he really wanted. That's what you wanted more than anything. To be with him. To be there for him. You wanted Joe. 

So you put the kettle on. And when he reached for your hand across the kitchen table, you knew he wanted you, too.

[mochegato]

Covert Romance

Continuation of Covert Dating 

Marinette nervously followed Jason up the narrow stairs, clutching his hand for reassurance.  “Are you sure it’s okay for us to be up here?” she whispered anxiously despite there being nobody else in the stairwell to hear.  She was positive they were breaking some kind of rule.  There was no way random people were allowed to just jaunt on up to the roof of the Wayne Enterprises building.  It was one of the most secure buildings in the city, hell, maybe the entire state.

The security officer at the front door had let them pass with little more than a nod to Jason and a smile, showing very little concern about them wandering around.  But now they were almost on the roof and it seemed like there should be another level of security to get up there, like someone appearing out of nowhere to check ID’s and intentions.  But there was nothing.  Just her and Jason and Jason’s keycard granting them the run of the building.

“Yeah Princess, it’s fine,” he reassured her with a smile squeezing her hand. “There’s a reason I have a keycard. I’m allowed to go anywhere in the building I deem necessary.  And I have deemed it very necessary for me to be up here right now with you.” He threw her a dashing smile that made her blush brightly as he let go of her hand to pull out his keycard again.

“Ready?” he asked putting the keycard back in his pocket after swiping it on the security pad.  

“For what” she asked with a suspicious smile.

“It’s a surprise.  Close your eyes and wait here for a second,” he said, excitement creeping into his voice. He had never brought someone up here before.  The view from the roof meant a lot to him.  It was one of his favorite spots in the world.  Gotham looked magical from up here.  Something about bringing her here made him feel exposed and he was eager to see how she reacted.  

When Marinette closed her eyes, he pushed the door open and gently placed the box he had been carrying with their dinner on the ground before turning back to Marinette.  “I’m going to bring you out now,” he said gently as he put one hand over her eyes and the other on the small of her back to guide her to a particular spot on the roof. “No peeking,” he warned gently. She could hear his cheeky grin in his voice.

As soon as she stepped onto the roof, she could feel the cool, crisp night air hit the exposed parts of her face, cooling her burning cheeks.  She could barely register the sounds of the city over her racing heart as he led her out onto the roof.  Her heart nearly stopped when she felt him step behind her almost touching his chest to her back and whispered, “Okay, open your eyes.”

She opened her eyes and gasped at the sight in front of her.  “What do you think?” he asked eagerly.  When she didn’t respond immediately he anxiously explained, “This is my favorite spot in the entire city.  It is the best place to see all of Gotham lit up.  From right here, you can see the neighborhood I grew up in, the waterfront, gargoyles… you can almost imagine something good could happen here.  Like there’s hope for us all.  ” he whispered with a shaky smile.  

Her eyes opened exceptionally wide as she took in the view.  “Jason, this is absolutely gorgeous.  I’ve never seen Gotham this way.  Oh my God, this is… I should have brought my sketchbook. Jason, this is amazing!”  She finally tore her eyes from the city to turn and face Jason, her smile beaming.  “Thank you for bringing me up here.”

Jason looked down at her, her exhilarated expression making his heart skip a beat. He let out the breath he had been holding since he removed his hand from her eyes.  The city lights were reflected in her gorgeous blue eyes making them sparkle even more than they usually did.  He smiled gently at her “I guess we’ll have to come back up here for our next date too, so you can bring your sketchbook with you.”  

Marinette’s breath hitched as she noticed how very close they were to one another.  She smiled shyly, “Second date huh?”  

He raised his hand to move a strand of hair the wind was whipping around her face to tuck it behind her ear, before moving his hands to cradle her face and run his thumbs over her cheeks.  God, he wanted to see that expression on her face every day, every moment.  He wanted to be the one to make her look like that.  “Or third… or fourth… two hundredth.  However many you’ll let me have, I’ll take.”  Sincerity shone in his eyes as he leaned down slowly.  He gently lifted her chin, keeping eye contact the entire time to check for any signs of apprehension.  Seeing none, he moved to within centimeters of her lips and whispered, “Is this okay?”

“Please,” she whispered back pushing up to meet his lips with her own, giving him a gentle kiss that was far too short for her.  She pulled away and opened her eyes to look up at him.  When their eyes met she saw the same desire she felt clouding his eyes.  She quickly pushed up to give him a second, longer, hungrier kiss.  His arms wound around her waist, pulling her body closer to him as hers found their way up to his neck and hair, pulling his face closer to her so she could deepen the kiss.

When they finally broke apart, breathing deeply, she smiled happily and twisted in his arms back toward the city, snuggling back against him.  He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and curled around her.  She leaned her head back against his chest with a happy sigh, taking in the beauty of Gotham at night.  She matched perfectly with his body, her head tucked snugly under his chin, like they were designed to fit together.  His body molded around her like a comforting blanket, making her feel warm and secure. She wanted more of this, more of him. “I’ll give you as many dates as you want.  As long as you’re there and kissing me like that, I’ll be happy.”  

“Couldn’t be much of a date if I wasn’t there.  Sounds incredibly boring for you.  What would you do?” He questioned in mock concern.

“Probably pine after you.  You’re right, I should just stick to dating you.”  She said pretending to come to a resolution.  

“It’s settled then,” he said nodding.  He squeezed her tightly for a moment and said, “Come on, let’s eat. I’m starving.”

A few minutes later, the blanket Jason had borrowed from his favorite Italian restaurant had been spread out and the dishes they had ordered placed on it along with a couple bottles of wine and glasses the owner had also packed in the box for them.  Joe had packed the box with everything they would need for an impromptu picnic and promised to tell his brothers, or anyone else asking about him, that he hadn’t seen or heard from Jason for a few days.  He even promised to ask if he should contact them if Jason did turn up to further the illusion that he hadn’t seen them.  Regardless of whether his brothers believed him or not, they wouldn’t get any information out of Joe to know if he went to another restaurant or got take out.  Jason was going to have to do something extra special for Joe.  This was exactly what they needed to escape from his family.

After dishing the food onto their plates and pouring the wine, Marinette broke the comfortable silence.  “Oh wow! You were right.  This is delicious.” He bowed slightly in acknowledgement instead of answering since his mouth was currently stuffed with food.  “So… you said there was a reason you had a key to go everywhere in the building.  What is that reason?”

“Oh… um…” he swallowed the mouthful he had just taken, “I’m head of security for the company.”  He’d had his answer prepared.  It was a plausible excuse, easy to believe with his expertise and familiarity with the building and employees.  

“Really!?  Oh my God! That must be insanely stressful.  This is one of the most targeted businesses in Gotham,” she reeled back in shock.  No wonder he was always keeping an eye out for suspicious activity and acting on it. She did it too, but that was because she had been Ladybug.  Now it made so much sense that he would do the same.  “I hope they give you lots of vacation days to burn off that pressure.” She took another bite of the pasta and furrowed her brow.  “Is that how you have access to a private jet?  They let you borrow it occasionally so you don’t go insane?”

“Not exactly but kinda, yeah.  Mr. Wayne lets me take it if I need to for some reason.  And my best friend’s dad is filthy fucking rich and has no problem using it to buy affection so... yeah.  What about you though?”

“Well… I mean, I don’t really.”

Jason raised his eyebrow at her. “Your roommate said that was bullshit.  Come on Mari, I want the whole and unabridged answer here,” he said urging her to continue.

She sighed.  “Okay so, my best friend… you almost met him tonight, my roommate, Adrien? Yeah, he used to be really wealthy with a private jet or two, but his dad turned out to be a supervillain… oh, remember me talking about Hawkmoth?  That was his Dad, Gabriel Agreste, so… not so many jets anymore.” Jason hadn’t expected that turn of events.  That would explain why she was so hesitant to talk about it.  Not a lot of people liked discussing their association with a supervillain.  Odd that her roommate would mention it in front of strangers, but then again who was he to critique someone else’s coping mechanisms.  

Jason was about to change the subject to a less dismal topic when Marinette swallowed her food and continued. “One of his other best friends is also rich.  Her dad is the mayor of Paris and her mom is Style Queen.  She likes me, Style Queen not the friend, although she doesn’t hate me anymore so… progress!  Well… tolerates me, so… frenemies?  Is it frenemies if only one person is doing it?” Marinette asked scrunching her face and cocking it to the side as if she was trying to figure out a puzzle before continuing to ramble on.  “But, she would really only let me borrow the jet if she thought it would annoy Adrien… or my other friends… or her parents… or anyone who said she couldn’t.  She really doesn’t like being told what she ‘can’ or ‘can’t’ do,” she rolled her eyes and grinned at Jason.  “Can’t really blame her though.  I’d do the same.  Also, my uncle is a rock star and another friend is a pop star and another is a supermodel… actually, she doesn’t have her own private jet but she does have a lot of people willing to let her use theirs whenever she asks, no questions asked... Also, I have a few clients that would probably let me borrow a jet if I asked desperately enough.”

Jason stared at her slack jawed.  His food was falling out of his open mouth unnoticed. “Holy fuck, Pixie!” he exclaimed when he could finally speak again.

“You wanted the whole answer! ‘Unabridged’ you said,” she protested, her cheeks bright red in embarrassment.

“And was that the whole answer?” he asked only half joking.

“I think… Oh, and I know a producer that probably has a few jets.  It seems like the kind of thing he would do. Maybe a few others.  My friends and I don’t really talk about things like that when we get together.”  She shrugged.

“Damn, who the fuck are you, Marinette?” he asked in awe.

She smiled and looked down timidly, “Didn’t I tell you?”  She looked back up with a scowl. “I am Batman” she growled out in a gruff voice.

Jason gave her a deadpan look and threw down his fork.  “That’s it. I lost my appetite.”  He mock pouted.  “That's it, Princess. You've managed to do what none of my brothers or hundreds of hours of hours of gory horror movies managed to do. I completely lost my appetite”

She gave him a raucous laugh that he quickly matched.  After the laughter had died out she looked back up at him with shining eyes and said playfully, “By the way, you can’t use ‘Princess’.”

“What?” he asked in confusion.

“You called me Princess a few times tonight.  You can’t use that one.  You’re going to have to stick to Pixie Pop or Cupcake or come up with some others.”

“Okay, but what’s the hang up with ‘Princess’?  Bad memories? Someone who’s ass I need to kick?”

“No, no, nothing like that.  It’s just that it’s Adrien’s nickname for me and he’s very protective of it.  Not that he doesn’t have a lot of them for me, but that one means a lot to him.”  She looked at Jason apologetically.  

Jason nodded, “Got it.  Princess has already been claimed.  I can live with that.”  He narrowed his eyes at her and pointed a warning finger at her before saying, “You can’t use Zombie or Buckethead.  Those are already taken by my brothers.”

She laughed loudly.  “Seriously?” He nodded solemnly in response.  “Damn, those were the ones I was going to use too.”  He squawked in response making her laugh even louder. Once their laughter had lightened she looked back out to the city and hummed.  “So what do you think our friends and family are doing now?  Do you think they are still looking for us?”

“I’m betting,” he started, taking another bite before continuing, “they went to the restaurant we picked up the food from, it’s a family favorite, tried to track our phones before seeing they were turned off, asked Alfred where we might have gone, and when he told them to back off, went to a coffee shop to regroup and plan.”

“Hmmm… That’s a lot of time with each other.  I wonder which of your siblings Adrien is going to say he’s in love with when I get home.”

“That desperate, huh?” he joked.

“That much of a romantic,” she corrected.  “When he falls, he does it quickly and with his whole heart.”

Jason hummed in response.  That was something he could bond with Adrien over.  He smiled gently at her as she looked peacefully out over the city with a gentle smile.  She was the smartest, strongest, sweetest woman he had ever met.  She was really too sweet for Gotham.  She was definitely too sweet for Red Hood.  Was he making a mistake bringing her into his life?  He really, really liked her, maybe even loved her at this point, but his life was dangerous.  He knew she had experience with danger after her years living in Paris while the Hawk guy was running around, but being with a vigilante was a different thing all together.  How would she react the first time he came home with a gunshot wound or broken ribs? How would he react if someone took her to get to him?  She wasn’t a hero like him.  How would she protect herself? He shook his head to clear the negative thoughts out of his head.  They had plenty of time to discuss that.  Tonight, in this spot that promised so much hope, he was going to enjoy his date.  “We should dance,” he said smiling lovingly at her as he stood up and walked a few feet away.

“There’s no music,” she laughed incredulously.

“Then we make our own,” he extended his hand to her.

Marinette stared at his hand for a moment before looking back in his sparkling eyes.  The eyes she would follow anywhere.  The eyes she fell in love with.  She smirked at him, “You have some secret beatboxing skills you haven’t divulged yet? Because that would be amazing.”

He smiled gallantly down at her “No, but my humming would make Bocelli jealous.”

She laughed, “Oh that I have to hear.”  She set down her plate and bounced up.  Before she reached his hand, they heard a thump on the other side of the roof.

“Oh shit,” Jason sighed out in annoyance and he moved between Marinette and the noise, effectively hiding her behind him.

Marinette watched the side of the roof the noise had emanated from, steeling herself to fight.  Batman emerging from the shadows had honestly never occurred to her, although it made sense. He was probably investigating why there were unauthorized people on the roof.  “Why aren’t you suited up?” he growled at Jason.

“I’m not working tonight, Batman,” Jason said very deliberately, shooting him a warning look, “so I’m not in my uh… uniform.”

“Oh my God, it’s the real Batman.  Did I… did I summon him?” Marinette whispered to Jason peeking out from behind him.

Batman glanced down at Marinette and looked back at Jason.  Jason could feel the disappointment and raised eyebrow under the cowl.

“His son is the demon, not him.” He said quietly to her with a smirk. Turning back to Batman he said, “We’re here on a date B.  Hiding from my family who couldn’t mind their own fucking business and decided to crash our date.” He said pointedly.

“You’re hiding from your family and you decided here was a good place to hide from them?”

“Hiding in plain sight.  They would assume I’d take her to a restaurant for our date not here.  And nobody else is expected to work for a while.  I was hoping we’d be out of here before then.”

Marinette’s mind was reeling.  Jason seemed unnaturally calm talking to the Batman.  She supposed he might be familiar with him considering his position for Wayne Enterprises. But, they sounded like they know each other really, really well, more than just Jason working with him for security. Also, that didn’t explain Batman asking him about suiting up.  That wasn’t a term you used with civilians.  It was a term heroes used…. “Oh my God.  You’re one of the bats!  You’re one of Gotham’s heroes.”

“Vigilantes” Jason said

“Oh my GOD!!” Marinette exclaimed backing away.  “One nice, normal guy, that’s all I asked for.  Just one love interest that wasn’t a fucking superhero. Why is that too much to ask?”

“Vigilante.  What do you mean just one?  How many superheroes have you dated?”

“You know, it isn’t even just boyfriends. Just one friend that doesn't risk their life constantly.” She ran her hand down over her face, “ugh, Adrien is never going to let me hear the end of this.”

“Oh, I don't risk my life, I make others risk theirs…” he paused to consider what he had just said and furrowed his brow, “I just realized that makes it sound like I need to get rescued a lot.  That's not what I meant.  I meant the bad guys do…. You know what?  I never said anything. This never happened.”

“Jason you almost got Robin killed last week. And you've literally died”

“What?!  I mean join the club, but what?” Marinette shrieked at him.

“What do you mean join the club?!” Jason exclaimed toward her then turned back to Batman “and Damian was in danger because he got cocky and rushed in.”

“SECRETS Jason.  Secret identities don’t do much if you tell them to everyone you take on a date.”

“It’s not like I’m Dick.  This is the first date I’ve been on in a year,” Jason said rolling his eyes.

“Really?” Marinette asked softly.

“Yeah, I hadn’t met anyone I wanted to date in a while.” he shrugged more vulnerable than Marinette had ever seen him, like she was witnessing a part of him he rarely let people see.  “And I didn’t tell her,” he defended, rounding back to Batman.

“Well she figured it out somehow,” he growled back at Jason.

“Me either,” she smiled gently up at Jason, then turned back to Batman.  “Actually, it was you with the ‘why aren’t you in uniform’ and all the familiarity you had with him that gave it away,” she said significantly less gently to Batman.

Batman gave her his patented glare.

“What is that supposed to do?  Intimidate me?  It isn’t going to change what happened.”  She stared back at him unimpressed with a raised brow.  “I’ve been glared at by the best.  I’m not going to lie, you’ve got a good glare but if you think your glare is better than Gabriel Agreste or Audrey Bourgeois or my Mom’s you’re delusional.  I’ve stood up to all of them and their glares without flinching.” Aside to Jason she said “except my mom because she’s really scary when she wants to be.”  Turning to face back to Batman, “I took Gabriel Agreste and his glare down.  I can do the same to you.”

Jason stared at her mouth slightly agape.  What, and he could not stress this enough, the FUCK was happening right now?  His little, too sweet for Gotham girlfriend… girlfriend, right?  She did agree to only date him so… He’d have to get confirmation on that.  His too sweet for Gotham girlfriend was making Bruce her bitch.  He was fighting hard against the urge to drag her back into the stairwell and push her up against the wall.  No, focus. He needed to focus.  Something about what she had said was off.

His mind started racing through what she said.  She said she took Gabriel Agreste down.  What did that mean… didn’t she say Gabriel Agreste was Hawkmoth? Ladybug took down Hawkmoth… Oh my God! That’s why she has a history with superheroes! “Holy Shit, you’re Ladybug!” He grinned widely.  His sweet, kind, brilliant Pixie was a superhero who could protect herself!  And, could backtalk Bruce like she was already a Wayne… He could make that happen actually…

Marinette looked up at Jason with a shocked expression “What?”

“You said you took down the Hawk guy.  Ladybug took him down.  You’re Ladybug.  You’re a superhero!   Wait... Adrien is the other one, right?  The cat one you talked about?  That's why you're so close.  That’s why you two always had each other’s backs.  Oh fuck.  That means he was fighting his dad the whole time and didn’t know it.  Oooh, B you really need to keep Selina away from him. She’ll adopt him… actually, you should stay away from him too.  I already have one blonde, secret superhero child of a supervillain sibling.  I don’t need another.”

“Secret identities, Jason. They're a thing for a reason” Marinette hissed at him.  

He just smiled back at her annoyed face as he wrapped his arms around her, “I’m just so glad you’re a hero and can protect yourself.”

“SILENCE,” Batman yelled.  “Who is Ladybug?  Who is Hawk Guy?  And, who is ‘The Cat One’.”

“I’ll brief you later,” Jason said grinning lovingly down at the woman in his arms. “Right now, I think I need to borrow the jet.”

Marinette opened her mouth to argue about secret identities but instead shook her head and sighed resting her head on his shoulder. “I’m not getting married without a white dress,” she said in resignation.  “I’m a designer, I need an amazing wedding dress.”

Just then the door to the roof burst open and Dick, Tim, Stephanie, and Adrien rushed through, tripping over each other in their haste to get out on the roof.

“I knew it!  I told you they would be here,” Tim said to the others in triumph before freezing when he saw Batman.

“Oh my God!  It’s Batman. It’s the Batman.  This is amazing,” Adrien gushed bouncing on the pads of his feet.

“It isn’t really that special, Blondie.  He’s way over hyped.” Stephanie said rolling her eyes and shooting Batman a sardonic grin.

“So… what’s going on guys?” Dick asked cautiously.

“It’s all good.  He can explain,” Jason said pointing to Batman and grabbing Marinette’s hand, guiding her toward the door.

“Hey, where do you guys think you are going?” Dick called out to them.

“We’re going to let the Bat explain everything.  Also, just so we’re all on the same page, everyone up here is a hero or vigilante,” Jason grinned back at them like he hadn’t just thrown a grenade. “Have fun with that conversation. We’re taking this date on the road,” he said pulling Marinette through the door and closing it behind them. “Come on, let’s get going before they come around.  Maybe we can be in Vegas before they recover.  If you want to.  If not we can date like proper people do and see where it goes.”

“I’m always up for a little chaos,” Marinette responded pressing a chaste kiss on his lips and grinning at the grumble he let out when she pulled away.  When he leaned back toward her trying to recapture her lips she pushed him away gently with a finger on his lips.  “We better move quickly then and if I start really kissing you again, I don’t think I’ll be able to stop,” she said giving him a seductive look.  “My Uncle’s in Metropolis tonight.  I can have his jet here within an hour but he’ll probably demand to be a witness. That gives us enough time to stop by my workshop and pick up the dress I just finished working on, which just happens to be white.  Kismet,” she grinned, grabbing his hand as they ran down the stairs laughing deliriously.

 Continued in Covert Wedding

______________________________________________________

Did I write this entire fic just for the ‘I am Batman’ line?  Yes, yes I did.

[backtothestart02]

A Pair of Lips I Can Kiss - 1/? | westallen fanfiction

A/N: I know...I know...another new fic. And a multi-chap at that. But writer’s block is slowly killing me, so whatever I’m inspired for I’m pretty much writing at this point. Hopefully it won’t last. Enjoy this chap!

...

Synopsis: 2x13 - Canon Divergent - Barry’s trip to Earth 2 goes somewhat differently after Iris surprises him the night before he leaves. 

...

Chapter 1 -

At the West house that evening, Iris sat in silence after dinner as she listened to Barry talk. She wasn’t smiling and neither was her dad. It wasn’t a topic either of them would’ve ever thought would pass Barry’s lips, and it was making Iris more nervous and depressed by the second. She couldn’t speak for her dad, but she was pretty sure he would make his feelings known eventually.

Why did Barry need to go to Earth 2? She thought. What could he do there that he couldn’t also accomplish here?

“Did you tell Henry?” Joe asked.

An excellent point.

Barry shared a meaningful look with Iris. She made no point of hiding exactly how she felt regarding the trip. He quickly looked away.

“No,” he admitted. “If he knew, he would just try to talk me out of it, and…he probably would, so.”

Well, if Henry can, maybe so can I, Iris thought.

“Dad.” She turned to Joe. “Can you give us a minute?”

“Yeah,” he said, probably as eager as she was to take the reins on this one. “I’ll make us some coffee.”

Barry, however, hardly waited until Joe had left the room before cutting off the beginning of Iris’ interrogation.

“Look, Iris, I know that this is…” he trailed off. “Nuts is the only word I can think of right now.”

She nodded, barely suppressing rolling her eyes.

“But it’s not like I’ve never done anything dangerous before.”

She mulled over her own thoughts and tried to take a breather.

“Look, I get why you are doing this,” she said. “Innocent people are in danger. That’s always been the direction that you’ve run in, even…even when you ran a little bit slower.”

That brought a soft laugh from him and a gentle smile from her. It didn’t last.

“I just…I want to make sure that you’re not doing this because you think you don’t have anything left here anymore.”

That wasn’t the whole truth, but it was all she was willing to reveal at this particular moment.

His face shifted in realization.

“This isn’t about Patty.”

She gave him a look.

“It’s not.”

She didn’t believe him.

“I mean, yeah, of course, I miss her. A lot. But…I know what I have here. I love my life. I love my job, being the Flash.”

A soft laugh fell out of her this time, her eyes twinkling up at him and that gorgeous, cocky grin of his. Did he notice how much she loved it?

“I love you and Joe.”

She nodded, only slightly put off that he’d put her and her dad in the same sentence when she wanted it to be just her. Was that selfish? Why would she want that? Of course she wanted him to love her dad too.

She just wanted to be loved…differently.

“I’m not trying to escape, I promise.”

Smiling now from the reassurance in that confident Flash voice of his, she decided that maybe her worries had been for nothing.

“Go win, Barry, and then come home.”

“Alright.”

But just in case her worries were justified, even in the slightest way, and wanting to make sure he really would want to come home to her – to everything he’d just said – she decided to take the plunge. She’d been in denial for months and she knew it. Patty may not have died, but Iris was starting to feel as if Barry’s nostalgia for her was similar to how she felt about Eddie now. Missing him but no longer overwhelmed by grief and despair and guilt.

And wanting…well, what was right in front of her and had been for almost her entire life.

She stood up and rounded the table until she was standing right beside Barry still sitting in his seat. She didn’t know what could possibly be going through his head. Maybe that she’d come to hug him? Or to tell her dad that he could re-enter their eating space? But he certainly didn’t expect her to – after sharing a brief smile with him – lean down, hold his chin between two of her fingers and plant a kiss on his lips.

But that was exactly what she did.

It was soft and warm, more than a peck but nothing passionate. She was still testing the waters after all, seeing if he still felt the same.

When she pulled back and released her grip on him, she found him staring at her in shock. He didn’t say anything, and she worried that her assumptions about his feelings for her having not changed despite being with Patty for a few months were completely off. Still, she didn’t regret it. It was one kiss. It wouldn’t ruin their entire friendship.

“Something for you to think about when you’re on Earth 2,” she said, then straightened and turned around, heading – probably – to the kitchen to get her dad.

Barry shook his head.

“Uh-uh.”

Incredulous, he practically jumped to his feet, then grabbed her hand, spinning her around until she was flush up against him. One hand on her waist, the other cupping her cheek, he met her eyes for the briefest of seconds before lowering his lips to hers for another kiss. This one was passionate.

“Bar-Barry,” she sputtered, pulling back before he stole all her breath.

He pressed his forehead to hers.

“Now,” he said, not bothering to apologize for taking her off guard. He could get used to her being breathless beneath him. She had, after all, reciprocated his kiss, just as he had hers. “Why did you kiss me?”

Iris was finding it hard to think now.

“Is it safe to come out?” Joe called from the kitchen.

Iris panicked, her eyes flashing open. She met Barry’s the second his hand covered her lips.

“Don’t you dare answer him before you answer me,” he whispered.

“I…”

“Iris?” Joe called.

“Just another minute, Joe,” Barry calmly called out, and Joe nodded inside the kitchen.

“Okay, no worries. I’ll just be in here drinking the whole pot of coffee.”

Barry and Iris quietly laughed at his antics. Iris relaxed in his arms until his fingers grazed her neck and a delicious chill sent a shiver running up and down her back.

“I’ve bought you 60 seconds, Iris,” Barry said quietly. “Less than, now.”

“I…I don’t…I mean…” She licked her lips. “I don’t know exactly. It’s just how I feel when I’m around you, and what I want, and I wanted you to know that before you maybe run into my doppelgänger over there and find her less complicated than I am.”

Barry’s eyes went wide.

“I’m coming out,” Joe announced.

Barry was too frozen in shock to say anything to the contrary, and Iris was embarrassed. She slipped out of his embrace and went back to sit down.

“Bring that coffee with you, Dad. I think I’d like a cup, if you haven’t finished it all already.”

Reluctantly, Barry returned to his seat.

“Now what kind of man do you think I am, Iris?”

She gave a pointed look to the half-gone pot of coffee he brought to the table.

“You’re going to be awake tonight.”

Barry chuckled, despite himself, and Iris shared a quick smiling glance with him before focusing entirely back on her father and the three of them for the rest of the evening. Not so much as acknowledging the kiss or the sort-of confession that had come after it before leaving to go home.

“Iris kissed me,” Barry said later that evening.

“What?” Joe burst.

Barry turned around when he realized he was not alone.

“Oh. You heard that.”

“Yeah, I heard it.” Joe sighed before sitting down on the sofa next to him. “I suppose I can’t stop you two. Assuming you kissed her back, of course.”

Barry’s eyes were wide as he nodded.

“Obviously. Of course.”

“Well, did she say anything afterwards? Or before? Is this why- oh, God. Is this why I was stuck in the kitchen for longer than necessary?”

Barry didn’t respond.

“Barry.”

He blinked out of his trance and looked at Joe.

“Huh?”

Joe sighed.

“So, are you staying or going?”

His brows furrowed.

“Hmm?”

“Did the kiss change anything?”

“No,” Barry said, and Joe frowned. “Not about me going to Earth 2. That’s set in stone. Iris and I talked it out before we-”

“Made out?” Joe muttered into his umpteenth coffee cup.

Barry tensed. “We didn’t…make out…necessarily.”

Though it certainly had felt like they had the second time around.

“Right.”

“I’m not going to let it drop, Joe. When I get back we’re talking things out. If she’s recovered enough from Eddie’s death to kiss me, then she can talk about her feelings for me again too.”

Joe smiled to himself.

“Good.”

Barry said nothing, but throughout the rest of the evening, Iris never left his thoughts. She’d be in his thoughts every moment he was on Earth 2, waiting to come home to her. He was ready to start his life again.

...

*will post on AO3 and FFnet when beta’d.

[lxvesickreality]

it’ll be okay

Request: Angsty Forty Quinn thing where the reader has to console him after he has a particularly bad fight with this dad?

Request: forty quinn x reader, reader celebrates forty’s 6 months sobriety in bed?

Pairing: Forty Quinn x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, smut, oral (male recieving)

Word Count: 1,720

Add on: mashed two requests together, i have a long list of requests, many forty quinn so here’s two!

gif is NOT mine, credit to owners

Y/N was seated in the driver's seat of her Audi R8 with her e/c eyes fixed on the back door of Anavrin, frown lines on her forehead and a fast paced heartbeat. Forty Quinn, her boyfriend of 9 months was inside in a ‘meeting’, as Forty had called it, with his father pitching a new idea to him probably begging for money at this point. He wouldn’t take a direct handout from Y/N even though she has enough money to last a lifetime and he claimed it would be wrong and weird but you knew it was because he craved the approval from his father. She knew how this would end, everybody did but it wasn’t able to be stopped so Y/N offered to take him to the meeting. 

Turning up the music a little more and resting your eyes relaxing against the seat, you took a moment to think of life but it was life and that didn’t last for long. Over the almost blaring music, she heard the slam of a door and her eyes blinked open to see Forty storming out with an angered look, clearly unstable. Fuck, Y/N thought to herself. Love Quinn, her boyfriend’s very close sister, was practically jogging to stay close behind him yelling for him to stop. The way she cared about her brother was everything, she was a great sister no matter what their mom said. Joe or Will-frankly, Y/N had no idea what to call him, situation with that was weird-ran after Love, pulling her by the arm to let Forty go and Y/N took this as her opportunity to exit the car.

“Forty?” she called out. The broken expression that was evident on Forty’s face broke his girlfriend’s heart. He had such high hopes going into this meeting, anxious and couldn’t sit still in the passenger seat on the way here with a big smile plastered on his face. That Forty was completely gone and was replaced by the unstable boy. “Oh, honey,” 

Forty walked to her, embracing her instantly feeling safe and calmed down slightly. She opened her eyes and caught Love giving her a small smile and mouthed ‘take care of him please’. Y/N nodded, pulling back to escort Forty back to the car and into the passenger's seat. “I just wanted his approval. Just fucking something from him.” 

You shut the door to the passenger side and climbed into the driver’s seat putting a hand on his shoulder. “I know you did, baby. I know,” the two buckled their seatbelts and Forty leaned over the middle console to lay his head on his girlfriend’s shoulder as she backed out into the parking lot to get to the street.

~

Forty and Y/N were seated on the couch, a blanket wrapped around them with a fire going. Y/N often kept her house cool since they lived in LA but today was rather cold out so she had her butler light it for her before she got home. She sent him and her maid home for the night off, paying them directly and gestured for Forty to take a seat in the family room. He obliged and curled up with a blanket. Y/N ordered his and hers favorite pizzas and sent a text to Love explaining how he was doing and that you’d call if something was wrong. She quickly sent a heart and thumbs up emoji back. 

“I ordered some pizza. Hope you’re hungry.” Forty barely acknowledged his girlfriend and closed his eyes. She sighed heavily, “Honey, c’mon, talk to me.” 

“I just wanted his stupid fucking approval but I can never have it! He barely ever has time to listen to my ideas. I mean, do you have any idea how long it took me to get him to meet me today?” she went to say something but Forty was sitting up and continued to vent. “He barely looks at me when we go to those stupid fucking wellness weekends. My mom treats me like a decent human being I guess but is complete shit to Love. Our parents suck, really fucking suck.”

“I kno-”

“And that isn’t the best part! My dad told me I’d never be something, that I’ll just ‘manage’ Anavrin for the rest of my life and live off my girlfriend that will probably leave me in-”

“You finish that sentence, Forty, and I’ll slap the shit out of you.” Y/N said sternly. Taking a hold of Forty’s face, she looked him in the eyes, meaning every word that came out of her mouth. “I love you, Forty. I’m not going anywhere. I have no reason to. I love you for who you are and I’m proud of you. You will become something because you are so determined to do so, I love that about you. So, shut the fuck up and just let me help instead of asking your piece of shit father for anything.”

Forty threw his arms around her, inhaling her familiar scent and melting in her arms. He was thankful to have this woman in his life, he thanked the person above every day for giving her to him. She was perfect for him and made him feel so wanted and loved. He pulled back to kiss her on the lips and she almost immediately kissed back as if she already knew he was going to. He could be predictable sometimes, especially with his timing of kisses. She sighed in absolute bliss as Forty tugged himself away from her addicting lips. Before he could kiss her again, this time more passionately and rough, the doorbell rang and he groaned. Y/N giggled to herself, standing up to grab the pizza she assumed was here and after a few minutes and loud exchanges with the delivery boy, she returned with the pizza. 

“Hungry?” she questioned, setting down the pizza on the coffee table.

“Yes,” his eyes gazed at her with lust filled eyes. “For you.”

“Forty Quinn, are you thinking what I think you’re suggesting?” she swayed her hips a little bit, stopping in front of him with a smile and suddenly an even bigger smile appeared. “Forty, do you know what today is?”

Forty shook his head, “No, why?”

“It’s officially been 6 months of sobriety.” Y/N straddled his waist, lightly pushing him back against the cushion and leaned down to whisper in his ear. “You know what that means. Celebration is in order.” she nipped at his ear earning a sharp intake of breath from him. 

He felt her soft lips lay gentle kisses down his neck nearly straight away feeling the blood rush to his member and he squirmed underneath her, by now just wanting to rip off her clothes to fuck her into this couch but he sat still letting his girlfriend work her magic. Abruptly, she rose up from her position to take off his tight shirt and ran her fingers over his chest admiring the way he looked once again before leaning back down to trail kisses down his torso. Sliding off his lap and keeping herself upright on her knees, she unbuckled his belt chuckling at his surprised expression telling him to help slide his pants off his legs. He did as he was told, almost tripping over his shoes as he slipped both his pants, boxers, and shoes off while his girlfriend waited patiently with wide open innocent eyes. God, did he love when she looked like that. 

Pushing his legs open a bit, she started at his right knee to start kissing up to her final destination loving the way Forty was squirming underneath her longing for her mouth to be elsewhere. An inch from her destination, she switched to the other knee to begin there.

“C’mon, kitten, stop teasing.”

“Shut up,” she demanded not bothering to peek at her boyfriend. He knew once she got to where he really wanted, it’d be worth it but he didn’t want to wait. Not even 10 seconds later, she got there. Taking him into her hand, she licked from the bottom of his shaft to his tip leaving a trail of her saliva behind and she swirled her tongue over the tip collecting the precum that was seeping out. Forty unconsciously bucked his hips upwards and Y/N took it as an opportunity to duck down to his balls kissing them softly. She knew it was going to get her in trouble later for teasing him so much but she looked forward to that because he gets so rough when he's teased and she loves it. 

"Fuck, kitten," he sucked in a breath when Y/N licked upwards again. She knew it was enough and slowly took him in her mouth. He was thick, but average, just the perfect size for her and once all of him was in, she gagged a little bit as he hit the back of her throat thrusting forward. She put her hands on his hips to keep him from doing that as she bobbed up and down sucking gently. He let out a loud moan when she went up stopping at the tip sucking slightly harder. That was his weakness and Y/N loved it. It always got the sexiest moan out of him and brought him real close to orgasm. "Just like that," 

She moved her right hand down to his testicles rubbing them softly, going back down his shaft. She gagged, a little saliva running out from her mouth but it didn't stop her from going a little further. She went back up and continued the little routine. Hearing him yell out 'fuck' gave her the signal he was about to cum in her mouth. Y/N went faster, sucking harder and not at all gently working him up to his orgasm. Her hand massaged his balls as quick as her mouth was going before she felt the slight jerk of his hips and the warm liquid entered her mouth. She went into action swallowing each drop that came out until she felt him start to go soft in her mouth and she knew he had finished. 

"Happy 6 months of sobriety, my love," she smiled up at him, fluttering her eyelashes.

[mistymazzello]

Cruel Summer| part iii

High school!Joe mazzello x reader

summary- they used to be best friends, but now that y/n has a boyfriend (that everyone hates), joe and y/n can’t seem to come to terms with their feelings, but it’s no secret to anyone how they truly feel.

warnings-cussing and mentions of sex

word count- 2.6k

based off of cruel summer by taylor swift

The guilt was eating you alive. You couldn’t believe that you acknowledged you had feelings for your best friend, you kissed him, and you liked it. But you tried your best to disregard it.

That’s what you were doing when you walked into school that Monday morning, Carter’s arm slung over your shoulder as you held onto his hand. You and Carter weren’t strangers to ignoring the fact that fights happen, you do it all the time. Neither you nor Carter had mentioned the huge blow out that happened this weekend, and you didn’t intend to.

As the two of you walked towards your locker, you saw Joe in the distance at his. Your stomach dropped and you immediately began recounting everything that had happened between the two of you no less than two days ago.

You arrived at your locker, Carter still not letting you go. He moved behind you and kissed behind your ear as you began opening the lock, ignoring Joe’s eyes that you could feel on you.

“Ok, baby, I’m gonna go.” Carter said, grabbing your jaw and kissing your cheek.

“Ok, bye.” You said, smiling at him.

“Love you.” He said, walking away. You didn’t respond. You just watched him slowly disappear into the crowd of students.

You slowly turned back around and made eye contact with Joe, who looked at you like you just killed his first born.

You quickly looked away and back at your locker. You looked back at him, and he did the same thing, because you made eye contact again.

“Are we gonna ignore what happened?” Joe spoke.

“Yeah.” You responded quickly.

“Y/N-”

“Don’t, Joe. Just don’t.” You cut him off.

He nodded and collected the rest of his books, slamming his locker so hard it made you flinch.

The rest of the day was filled with awkward eye contact and knowing glances. Some down right mean comments were made, and your heart sunk as you realized things were back to the way they were before with Joe. And you hated it.

You hated that you and Joe never got closure from what happened. You didn’t know how he felt about it and he didn’t know how you felt either. He was embarrassed, and having to be around you all day was humiliating. Having to force Joe to watch Carter kiss you and hang all over you at school was upsetting for you, too. You didn’t want him to feel that way, you didn't want him to like you and you wish you didn’t love him. Or at least not right now.

The days went by slowly, graduation slowly creeping up on all of you until it was a week away. You were running out of time. Once school was over you would have no logical reason to see Joe, and then college would start and you would probably never be around him ever again.

One particular night, this realization was hitting you hard. That’s not what you wanted with Joe. You wanted so much more, but you were scared. Too scared to give up the security that came with Carter and too scared to accept the fact that you’re in love with your best friend.

You ended up reading old texts between the two of you and scrolling deep into his instagram. You saw a few pictures of the two of you from previous years, the memories making you smile. You found yourself stuck on one picture in particular. A picture of the two of you in the middle of the street from one of the nights where you would go on walks at 1 in the morning.

“Ok wait, let me set up a timer or something.” You said propping your phone up against a light post.

You started the timer and you saw the numbers slowly counting down.

“Wait wait wait! What are we gonna do?” Joe yelled.

You hadn’t thought that far ahead. “I don’t know? Do something! There’s like 6 seconds left!”

Joe swept you off from your feet and held you bridal style. “Act I just saved your life or something!” he shouted. You wrapped your hands around his neck and he smiled at you. “Hold on.”

He tipped you backwards like you were about to fall and you screamed and you saw the flash go off on your phone. You hopped out of his arms to run up to your phone to see the picture.

The two of you laughed at it for a while, Joe promising you he’ll be posting it as soon as he got home.

You stared at the picture for a long time, contemplating. You decided you needed some type of closure. If not closure, you just wanted some kind of interaction with Joe. You wanted to be around him. You stood up then began walking out of your room, but you stopped yourself.

“God, what am I doing?” you said under your breath. You turned back around and sat on your bed. You put your face in your hands and thought about what you were about to do.

“I have to.” You whispered to yourself. Before you knew it you were slowly opening your front door so it wouldn’t make noise. You shut it behind you and you were moving so quickly you hardly remember speed-walking down the sidewalk and up Joe’s driveway. You went to the side of the house and saw his bedroom windows. His lights were still on.

You looked at the ground for something to throw, anything. You settled on a stick you found in the landscape. You threw it as hard as you could and it hit the window, making a louder noise than you thought.

You waited for a few seconds, then began searching for something else to throw. You found a few small rocks and threw them all at once. You watched the window intently until you saw a hand reach out to unlock it. He pulled the window open and stuck his head out.

“Y/N?” He said.

“Hi.” You responded. It was then you realized you had no idea why you were there and you really had no plan on what to say.

He looked down at you for a few seconds then shook his head. He pulled his head back inside and shut the window before you could protest.

You put your hand on your forehead and shut your eyes. “Shit.”

You watched as his lights clicked off and you began to feel your face get red, embarrassment setting in. Joe just shut you down.

You stayed put for a few moments, trying not to get dramatic and cry. You decided to go home instead of keep trying, you had had enough embarrassment for tonight.

“Y/N?” You heard Joe say from behind you.

You turned around and saw him standing there, a small smile on his face and you sighed in relief.

“Do you need something?” He asked.

Seeing him like this made you feel a certain type of way. He was in pajamas and his hair was messy. He looked cute. Really cute. And it wasn’t helping the fact that you were in love with him while you had a boyfriend. All of the emotions bottled up from the past week began to pour out, anger and frustration and fear and love. You walked over to him silently, your bare feet stomping against the grass. You didn’t know what you were doing, your emotions completely taking over at this point. You grabbed both sides of his face and, without letting yourself think about it, you kissed him.

Joe was taken aback. First, you show up at his house using his whole “throw rocks at the window” routine. Then you don’t say a word to him and just straight up kiss him. He melted into you, his heart soaring. The fervent way you kissed him made him high, and he let himself get wrapped up in the passion. He sighed into the kiss and you took the opportunity to slide your tongue into his mouth. His arms wrapped around your waist and you moved your hands from the sides of his face to his hair.

The way your lips moved against each other was unexplainable. It was like you had been practicing for years. It just made sense.

When you finally pulled away, you felt an immense sense of relief. Joe smiled at you, not releasing you from his arms.

“What was that for?” He asked.

“I just wanted to. I needed to.” You said. He nodded and adjusted his grip on you.

“Did you break up with Carter?”

You sighed and set your forehead against his shoulder. “No.” You said into his shirt.

You felt him immediately let go of you. You tried to grasp onto him, but he backed away.

“Y/N.” He said.

“I know, Joe, I’m sorry.”

“I don’t understand you. Do you think it’s fun to confuse me or something?” He said.

“No, not at all,” you pleaded “I just… I don’t know what I want.”

“Then leave me out of the process of figuring it out. I’ve waited for you. For a long time. And now it’s like you’re taunting me. You’re holding it over my head. I’m done waiting, Y/N. Let me know when you figure it out because I’m done being a second choice.”

“Joe-”

He turned around and walked away.

At this point your decision was pretty much made.

The next morning, you got up early and drove to Carter’s house. You knocked on the front door and his dad answered.

“Oh, um, good morning, Y/N.” He said, a little confused why you were there.

“Hi. Is Carter here?”

“Yeah, um-”

“Can you tell him to come out here?” You said eagerly.

He furrowed his eyebrows. “Yeah… I’ll be right back.”

You sat down on one of the rocking chairs on their front porch and took a deep breath. You tried not to think about what you were about to do, you didn’t want to give yourself the chance to have any second thoughts.

The door opened and Carter came out. He squinted from the sunlight and rubbed his eyes. You stood up and he looked at you like you were crazy.

“Baby, it’s 9 in the morning, what do you-”

“I’m breaking up with you.”

He blinked. “What?”

“I’m breaking up with you.” You repeated.

“No, I heard you. What? Why?”

You didn’t want to tell the truth. You shrugged.

“You don’t know?”

“I just don’t want to be with you anymore.” Well, that was true.

He laughed. “There is no fucking way you’re doing this right now. Y/N, we graduate in 5 days.”

“I’m sorry, Carter.”

“No, don’t fucking give me that stupid ‘I’m sorry’ shit.”

You stood there for a few seconds, not knowing what to say.

“It’s because of Ben, isn’t it?” He asked.

“No! Oh my God, no, not at all.” You said

He shook his head and turned to open the door. “You’re a fucking bitch.”

He walked inside and you stayed there for a few seconds, trying to process what you just did. 6 months of your life, down the drain. You felt bad, but what Joe said to you last night made you feel worse.

You got into your car and started laughing. You just sat there and laughed. You just broke up with your boyfriend of 6 months for your best friend.

You’re boyfriend of 6 months.

The laughing turned into crying extremely fast.

You cried the entire way to Lucy’s house. You couldn’t keep this to yourself anymore.

Still crying, you walked up to Lucy’s house. You knocked on her door and to your surprise, Rami answered.

“Y/N?”

“Rami?”

“Why are you here?” he said.

“Why are you here? Where’s Lucy?”

“She’s asleep…”

You noticed he was wearing nothing but boxers and a white t-shirt. He spent the night here.

“Where are her parents?”

“Out of town.” he replied.

You both stood there, confused. You sniffed and wiped your eyes, then looked at Rami, who had his head leaning against the doorway.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

You laughed. “No.”

He invited you in, and you both had so many questions, you didn’t even know where to start.

“You wanna talk about it? I can make coffee.” He said. You hadn’t told him anything yet, but again, you were crying, so he assumed something was going on.

“Yeah. That’d be great.”

Rami made you coffee and you sat next to him at the bar in Lucy’s kitchen and told him everything. All of the details, all of the feelings.

You finished it off with, “So. I’m in love with Joe and I just broke up with my boyfriend for him. What do I do now?”

“Holy shit” He laughed.

“I know.”

“Okay, first of all, come here.” He opened his arms and you began crying again. He hugged you for a while and let you cry.

You pulled away and realized you hadn’t acknowledged the fact that he had slept over a Lucy’s.

“So I told you everything, now you tell me everything.” You said.

“What?” he laughed.

“You and Lucy?” you questioned.

“Oh, um,” he smiled and looked at the floor “yeah… I slept over last night.”

“I can tell.” you smiled. “are you two…”

“Not officially. We haven’t really even said how we feel to each other. We just kind of… do this. A lot.”

You raised your eyebrows and gasped. “Oh my god!”

He laughed at your reaction and you smiled again. “A lot? You and Lucy sleep together a lot? How did I not know about this?”

“How did I not know about you and Joe?” he shot back.

“Um, hi?” Lucy said as she walked into the kitchen.

You both jumped. “Hi Lucy.” You said “I um, came here to talk to you but Rami answered the door.”

You put her face in her hands. “Oh god. I’m embarrassed.”

“How the did I not know you two were fucking?” you asked.

“How the fuck do you know about that?” She gasped.

“Ok first of all, Rami answered your door at 9 in the morning, in his boxers. Second, I told him a ton of stuff so he told me about what was going on.”

“Wait, what’d you tell him?” she asked.

“Oh my god, Lucy, you’re not gonna believe this.” Rami said.

You had to re-explain everything to her, getting a bigger reaction from her than you did from Rami.

The rest of the morning was spent talking about each other’s secret relationships and laughing. You didn’t feel so alone in this anymore and you liked that. You liked not having the weight of secretly being in love with your best friend on your shoulders, and you loved not having the weight of Carter on your shoulders.

“We have to all hang out tonight. That’ll give you the chance to talk to Joe, Y/N! It’s perfect!” Rami said.

It didn’t take much convincing, because you wanted to see Joe so you could tell him about Carter as soon as possible.

Rami sent a text out into your group chat saying to come to his house tonight at 8. You all sat over his phone waiting for Joe to reply.

Finally, he did.

Can I bring someone?

Your stomach dropped and you all watched intently after Rami asked ‘who’. All of the worst case scenarios were running through your head, but none of them prepared you for what he was about to say.

A girl.

-

taglist- @seven-seas-of-ham-on-rhye @briarrose26 @mrsmazzello

[shipersanonymous]

One Hit West

Chapter 5

Author's note:

Took forever!!!! But for a 4000 word chapter I think the two week wait was kinda OK? I hope? Of course as always this chapter will leave you with more questions then you care to have and all building up to the great answer!

Hope you all like it!!

Cliffhanger warnings apply 😉❤️

P.S There’s a bit of a flashback within a flashback here. Hope it doesn’t confuse you! 

XOXO

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

[Iris]

The doorman holds the door open for her and Iris thanks him with a smile as she pushes the stroller in. Her mom jeans hang loosely around her legs, concealing the armada of weapons strapped to them and years of practice allow her to walk without acknowledging the extra weight. It’s an easy enough target, mistaken identity style kill, but she’d rather be prepared then to get trapped with nothing but a rifle. Iris walks into the lift and keeps on her act. Bare hands (except for her ring); large, square shades obscuring her face and a short wig that’s styled into a generic “mom-like” messy bun.

As the numbers on the little screen change, taking her closer to her destination, she finds herself taking deep breaths and completing her transition into her work persona.

Cold.

Cruel.

Calculated.

The transition is almost ritualistic. Usually she switches within the blink of an eye but this evening her mind is pestered by memories of the night before…

“Iris,” her father greeted calmly, without turning his head towards her. His relaxed attitude aggravated her further and she found herself forcing deep breaths in order to stay as composed as possible.

“Where’s my daughter?”

“Upstairs, fast asleep, but…”

Iris stopped in her tracks.

“…before you go up and get her…”

Joe put his cup down and stood up to face her for the first time.

“…you owe me an explanation.”

“I don’t owe you shit,” Iris spat, and turned around to ascend the stairs when her father’s bellowing voice stopped her mid-step yet again.

“Don’t you dare turn your back on me Iris!”

“Or what? Huh?” She challenged, her cool seeping out of her with every passing second.

“What are you gonna do dad? In a matter of hours you’ve attempted to kill my daughter’s father then kidnapped her. How are you planning on topping that off?” Iris kept her voice down out of fear of waking Nora and having to face questions she wasn’t as yet ready to answer.

“What were you doing at the casino?” He asked, ignoring her question. Iris looked at him incredulously then let out a half-hearted chuckle and answered:

“I felt lucky, thought I’d have a go at some poker.”

“I’m going to ask you, one more time. What? Were you doing? At the casino?”

“I already-”

“Iris.” Joe’s tone came out as a warning and he turned his head to the side, closing his eyes shut like a man trying to hold back an outburst.

“Hasn’t that boy ruined your life en-”

“No dad! He didn’t ruin my life, you did! You ruined my life when you kicked me out!”

“I gave you an option God damn it! It was your decision to walk away!”

Iris couldn’t believe her ears. To this day her father still thinks that the alternative to her packing her bags would have been the better choice.

“I’m not in the mood to have this conversation for the billionth time. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to get my daughter and go home.”

“Where is he?” Joe demanded, once again paying her statement no mind. His ability to hear what he wants to when he sees fit never fails to surprise her.

“We both know I’m not going to tell you. I didn’t save him just to have you kill him.”

“So you were interfering with my hit?”

Iris sighed, tired and exasperated.

“Yes dad I was. Is that what you wanna hear? That I was doing what’s right for my child like any good parent would? Do I have to explain how this works since clearly good parenting is a language you forgot the minute I told you I was pregnant?”

She regretted the words the minute they left her lips but it was too late and the grave expression that fell over her father’s worn features told her that she’d pressed the mother of all buttons.

“Get out,” he growled under his breath.

“Gladly. After I get what’s mine,” she answered without letting her regret show through.

The lift dings on her floor and Iris pushes the empty stroller to apartment number 64, the very apartment she pretended to be scouting a week before as she took notes of the building’s important features: emergency exits, security cameras, fire alarms etc. That’s how she knows that the hallways are monitored with cameras while the apartments are kept safe with motion detectors.

The stair ways are dead zones and are basically the least secure places save for the automatic locks on the doors that can only be opened with access key cards. The stairs are also the only way to reach the basement and that’s where the screen room is located. Not that she needs any of this information. Her father has a Loyal in almost every building in the city. These are people that either owe him, work for him or are too afraid to test him and therefore grant him any and all means of access into a number of places. Apartment buildings, restaurants, entertainment destinations, tourist attractions – you name it. And all she needs to get in is her red ruby ring. It’s a simple stone, common enough not to draw suspicion if worn by many and yet unique enough to be used as a distinguisher. Although in her case the red makes it special. The rest of her father’s hit family have rings with much the same design but their stones are green emeralds instead. Red rubies are reserved for those with the last name West.

They were her mother’s favourite gem stone.

The walk up the stairs threatened to bring back memories she didn’t need roaming through her mind at that very moment. Memories from before. Before loss turned her father in to a cold hearted killer. Before she saw the way his face changes just before he pulls that trigger.

Before she became him.

Iris walked into her old bedroom, all the details giving her a sense of Déjà vu. It was all exactly as she’d left it, from the positioning of the furniture to her high school photo frames (considerably emptier than they were when she still called the room hers), to the paint on the walls. It was like stepping into a time capsule of some of the greatest moments of her life…

Her freshly painted toes wiggled in the air as her feet rested (crossed at the ankle) against the wall. The still hot curls in her hair, cascaded over the edge of her bed like a water fall and she passed the time with a book in her hand. Getting dressed with three hours to go seemed like over kill and even though she was excited to see Barry, she wanted the moment to be perfect.

Perfect didn’t include her looking sweaty in a wrinkled dress. So she practised the art of patience as she dove into the third of the Twilight books. A knock on her door drew her attention away from Bella’s latest inner turmoil and she asked the visitor to come in. Barry’s fresh shaven face popped into her room, his hair neatly slicked back and as he stepped inside, the space was filled with a deliciously masculine scent. Her eyes bulged out of their sockets as she took him in, pressed suit with a bouquet of sunflowers in his hand, ready to go and earlier than ever.

He was up to something.

“Barry what are you doing here so early? We’re not supposed to meet for another three hours!” She asks, putting her book down without saving her page, she’d already read it three times any way, she’d be able to find that page with just a few flips.

“I just couldn’t wait to see you.” He smiled, though she noticed the glimmer of nervousness in his stare.

“But - ” Before she had a chance to finish her sentence Barry dropped down on one knee and Iris felt herself grow pale.

“Barry? What are-”

“Just, hear me out ok? I know that we’ve only known each other for a year and that we still have a life a head of us – graduation and college and work - but Iris the truth is, within our first week together I already knew that no one would ever complete me the way that you do,”

“Barry,” was all she could whisper out as she tried to keep her tears in. She was shocked out of her mind and had no idea what to think but her heart felt every word that slipped out of his mouth.

“I love you Iris,” he said as he reached into the bouquet and pulled out a tiny red velvet box.

“And I know that we’re too young to get married, but I can’t stand the thought of a possible future without you. Which is why I found a compromise.” He opened the box and inside rested a single silver band with tiny red jewels imbedded into it.

“This isn’t an engagement ring, not yet anyways, but it is still a symbol of my promise to you. My promise to love you, be there for you, support you and take care of you for the rest of our days. And someday, hopefully soon, I promise to replace this ring with a much more permanent version.”

Iris found herself struggling to breathe and if it weren’t for the fact that she was still standing paralysed in front of him she might have thought her legs had magically disappeared because she couldn’t feel them. She couldn’t feel any part of her body except for her roaring heart.

“What do you say Iris? Will you take this ring as a symbol of my promise of forever?” he asked and at that the tears made their debut on her yet to be made-up face. She nodded, unable to speak and covered her mouth with her left hand as she slipped the delicate piece of jewellery on her right hand’s ring finger. Barry rose back onto his feet and she half laughed, half sobbed as she noticed the moisture in his eyes before she pulled him into her and hugged him tight. They parted a few inches, just enough for him to lean into her and offer her a tender kiss.

“I’m guessing this means that she liked it?” came Joe’s voice from the door way and the young couple took a reprieve from their embrace to look at him, though they remained in each other’s arms.

“Dad?”

Joe smiled and folded his arms over his chest as he leaned side-ways against the door frame.

“And I thought I had a hard enough time gift shopping for you, but this young man right here second guesses everything when it comes to you. This was the longest jewellery hunt in the history of man.” He commented with a chuckle and a look of fondness directed at the youth before him.

“Wait a second, so you knew?” Iris asked.

“I kinda asked your dad for help shopping for the ring,” Barry admitted, sheepishly.

“Right after he asked me for permission to give it to you and promised never to break your heart.” Joe added proudly, there was nothing Joe loved more than a respectful young fellow with good old fashioned morals. Except of course if that young fellow happened to look at his little girl like she hung every star in the sky. That was reason enough to have his old heart smiling for the rest of its beating days.

Because she’d found someone who would love her as much as he once loved his wife.

“Hold on to this one baby girl. He’s one of the good one’s”

“I know,” Iris said, her twinkling gaze glued onto Barry’s just before he closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to hers.

Her eye’s drifted briefly to the jewellery box on her vanity table and almost as if she had x-ray vision, in her mind’s eye, she looked past the white jewelled exterior and could picture the ring where she’d left it. Hidden from herself at the very bottom. Almost as if she we’re trying to bury the memories and emotions that came with it.

The whiskey burns its way down her throat and warms her up from the inside out. It’s the only thing she currently feels as she waits for the tiny buzz of her watch.

Beep – beep.

There it is.

With one last look at the city she downs the rest of her dry drink and turns around to make her exit, grabbing the diaper bag and travel seat that rested on the couch. Her “busy mama” act has her power walking to the nearest stairway exit where she uses her access card to disappear from the cameras view. The stairs offer her all the privacy she needs to slip out of her baggy sweater and jeans to reveal the black leather, skin tight suit she has on underneath. Her weapons are still carefully attached to the sides of her legs.

Iris pulls on her gloves and ankle length trench coat then whips off her wig and reaches down for a gun as she gazes at her watch. A door on the wall to her left opens up to a storage closet that she uses to hide away her baby seat and diaper bag then up the stairs she goes, screwing on her silencer as she takes the stairs two at a time. All the while she takes deep breaths and pushes down the last of her humanity, the last of her thoughts of her baby girl.

Her focus shifted from the Pandora’s box on the table to Nora’s sleeping figure. Cecile, who was seated on the edge of the bed beside Nora, looked at Iris and smiled sadly. Iris’s heart went out to her, she was the only one who could get her father to feel anything other than hatred at the world since her mother’s passing and yet she couldn’t get him to be the old Joe, the Joe she deserved.

“How long has she been asleep?” Iris whispered, kneeling down beside her bed and stroking her daughter’s hair gently. All at once the action soothed her every insecurity and it felt like discovering how to breathe a new. She leaned in and planted a tender kiss to the child’s warm forehead and breathed her in.

She smelled like home.

“Not long. Go ahead, take her, I’ll help you out with her chair.” Cecile whispered back, smiling sympathetically. Iris thanked her with a smile of her own and shifted so as to slowly lift her daughter up. She was careful not to make any violent or miscalculated movements, almost like she were handling a rare doll made of glass.

But the caution was needed.

Nora curled into her mother’s arm burying her face in Iris’s chest and no words could describe the paradoxical feeling of fear and security that came with having her baby in her arms. With one arm under her daughter’s knees and the other supporting her back, Iris walked down the stairs and out the door towards her car, her father paid her no mind as she left and she did her best to ignore the sting his lack of attention injected into her.

“Thanks Cecile.” She said once Nora was safely strapped in and her chair tucked away in the trunk.

“Not a problem, and don’t worry about your dad. He’ll come around.” She said.

“Not if he keeps hating on everyone with the last name Allen,” Iris pointed out in a matter-of-fact tone.

“That name, it’s taken a lot from him.” Cecile tried to reason with Iris and the other woman’s eyes seemed to say ‘form us’ though she dared not speak of her loss. It hurt too much to think about.

Iris wouldn’t budge. She knew better. She knew that her father didn’t know the half of what he’d lost, of the nightmares she attributed to that name. And with the way that things were going he would never know. Not from her mouth anyway. So as she steps into her car she responds:

“Not me, he pushed me away all by himself.”

The jog up the three flights of stairs help circulate the adrenaline in her system so by the time she steps out into the hallway of the 28th floor she’s fired up and ready to strike. She takes calm steps towards apartment number 81 and stands in front of it like she’s ready to knock. With a subtle movement she tucks some stray hair behind her ear, flashing her ring at the camera and a few seconds later, the red recording light dies out.

She’s got five minutes.

Her actions gain a certain fluidity as she turns back towards apartment number 83 and knocks as gently as she possibly can. A tall man with a 6 o’clock shadow and a head free of hair answers the door. His dress shirt is half undone yet still tucked into his black suit pants, under different circumstances Iris might have stopped to allow herself to take him in but her mind is elsewhere and she’s still pissed about last night. She needs to blow off some steam. His seductive smile slips from his lips when his eyes land on Iris giving away that he was expecting someone else.

In his confusion he asks:

“Who the he-”

But Iris has no time for chit chat. Before he can blink, she’s moved into the apartment, closed the door behind her, pressed her weapon against his forehead and pulled back the trigger. Pieces of cerebral tissue redecorate the space behind him and he falls to the ground, painting the white tiled floor with blood. Iris approaches without hesitation and stairs at his wide eyes with indifference.

“Your wife sends her love,” she says before firing two more shots. The hit brief she got requested that this be staged as a crime of passion. Hence the foreign gun and overkill. Some poor unfortunate side piece is about to get some major jail time while the “weeping” widow cashes out the prick’s life insurance. All’s well that ends well in the game of hearts. Iris discards the weapon on the floor and walks out with a minute to spare. She sees the numbers above the elevator light up as it brings a passenger closer to her and she smiles, assuming that it must be the unsuspecting mistress. Just before the lift reaches her floor she walks back out into the stair way and follows it down to her disguise with a reassurance that a few seconds later the cameras rebooted and set the perfect trap.

…

[Barry]

Earlier today…

It’s a weird feeling, waking up in a strange bed at a strange house and yet somehow feeling completely at home. This notion haunts him all morning as he stares up at the white ceiling and tries to make sense of it.

Maybe it’s the thought of it being her house. Or the fact that her scent lingers in every little corner of the place. Maybe that’s why it all seems so strangely comfortable. Like getting to share her little secret.

Getting to be her little secret.

Yet, as good as that all might sound Barry can’t help the sinking feeling in his stomach, the dull ache of his heart’s every thud. The gut twisting sensation that she’s hiding something from him, something life changing. He plops one hand underneath his head and sighs. It’s mid afternoon and Barry is wasting his day away in bed. He tried to do a little cardio, made some breakfast, read a page or two but every action put him down a path of what ifs.

What if Iris were there? Would he be making her breakfast? Would she be reading him a passage from the book as he poured her coffee? Would she be wearing one of his old t-shirts and chuckling when he pressed a random kiss to her cheek?

Sigh.

More questions without answers.

It’s times like these that Barry normally turns to his brother. Bart is most definitely the most rational of them both. Barry always thinks with his heart despite his superior intelligence but Bart always finds a way to act with rationality. They always joke that their personalities came with their middle names. Bartholomew “Barry” Henry Allen took after their father, flexible mind but much too large a heart. Bartholomew “Bart” Harry Allen took after their ‘uncle’ and legal guardian Harrison, kind at heart but ever the critical thinker. It’s a trait that Barry, at times, envies in his twin brother: the ability to disconnect from emotion in favour of science. Barry can’t bring himself to do it.

He always wears his heart on his sleeve.

The sound of keys turning in the lock draw Barry’s attention back from his differences with his twin and he turns his head towards the sound while listening intently.

“Can we get the purple tights and my STAR Labs sweater aunt Anissa?”

A young girl seems to ask and the innocence in her voice brings a smile onto his face.

“’Course you can baby. Since your mom forgot to pack your clothes this morning you get to pick what ever you like.”

That voice is unmistakable. It’s definitely Iris’s favourite cousin Anissa. Barry hasn’t seen her since that random run in, a year after the break up…

It had been a year since he’d last seen her. Their anniversary was drawing near and he hadn’t so much as glimpsed her across the street or bumped into her at the grocery store. It was hard but nothing compared to those first few months.

The confusion as to what could possibly have gone wrong. The multitude of questions without answers. The heart ache, so strong at times he’d wake up in the middle of the night fighting for breath. He’d sunk into a depression so deep that his uncle had him seeing both a psychologist and psychiatrist. He’d been prescribed antidepressants and moved to England because a “change in scenery” would do him good.

All it did was provide him with enough isolation to feed his loud mind. So during the brief Christmas break, when Harrison summoned him back home, Barry made a habit out of wondering aimlessly about the streets of Central City. He blamed his sleeplessness on the time zones but he knew better. A good night’s sleep hadn’t formed part of his routine in a while. Power naps and unhealthy amounts of coffee were what kept him afloat in college.

In England he’d found an escape in his academics, burying himself in pile after pile of literature. Completing assignments way ahead of the due dates and prepping tutoring material to help a few nameless faces after class. So when the holidays came around he suddenly found himself spoiled for time and with nothing else but his neglected heart ache to occupy his mind.

That’s when the endless drives around the city became routine. He’d managed to convince himself that he was simply trying to pass time but he knew – he felt – that in reality he was looking for her.

Iris.

It was on one of these drives that he ran into Anissa. With no where to go, Barry found himself at a 24hr convenience store, roaming through the aisles of all things comforting and deadly. On his way to the freezers he glimpsed a familiar profile in his peripheral and stopped mid step. Low and behold there she stood, with a tin of powdered milk in her hand and a shopping basket filled with baby supplies. The tin she held grabbed all her attention so she didn’t notice Barry approaching till he was a few steps away and asked:

“Anissa?” She startled, which was expected, but when her face turned towards him it didn’t instantly flood with recognition and a drop of sympathy. Instead her eyes widened and her face paled with fear. Without warning she dropped her basket on the floor and took off running. He chased after her, too desperate to pay the questioning looks any mind.

“Anissa wait! Please!”

But she didn’t slow. Instead she knocked down a stack of canned food in an attempt to leave the tin of milk that was still in her hand. Barry chased her outside but couldn’t catch up to her. So eventually he stopped and simply watched her make her escape. Jennifer, her younger sister, was in the car with her and she seemed to have a baby in her arms…

Barry remembers wondering who’s baby was in the car that night. Now, doing the math, he realises that it could have been Iris’s little girl. Which leaves the question: Where was Iris when her cousin was playing house with her daughter?

“Do you want to get any books while we’re here?”

“No it’s OK. I’ve read all of these already. Mom promised she’d take me book shopping on my birthday anyway. I can wait till then.”

The little girl’s voice held a note of sadness at the mention of her birthday, but a sadness brought on by hope. Almost as if she wanted to believe that the statement was true but knew otherwise.

“Does that mean you’re not coming to see aunt Jen and me? You know she’s been working real hard on your surprise.” Anissa tries to cheer the little girl up, all the while Barry listens intently from his new vantage spot behind the door.

“I like cup cakes better the next day. Aunt Jen can just put them away for me.” She answers, by the sound of it she seems distracted.

“Cupcakes? Who said anything about cupcakes?” Her aunt sounds surprised.

“Come on aunt Nissa. I practically live with you and I know you barely get enough time to bake. I also know that you only get one bag of flour to last at least five months if the expiry date permits and only get enough chocolate chips to cover one batch of pancakes or cookies when you feel up to the task. That being said, last week you bought a fresh bag of flour, a dozen more eggs when you already had in your refrigerator and enough chocolate chips to either make three batches of cookies or aunt Jen’s double chocolate cupcakes. You’re out of shortening so that can only mean you’re making cupcakes. Conclusion: aunt Jen is making me cup cakes for my birthday.”

Barry’s jaw drops and it isn’t till he sees his own shock reflected on Anissa’s side profile that he realises he’s stepped out of his hiding place. His ears couldn’t believe what they were hearing so he subconsciously walked towards the sound of her voice only to find that the person giving out such a detailed explanation is in fact a little girl.

Her back is to him as she’s sorting through some clothes in a drawer and her hair is done in two loose fish braids that disappear into the back of her wheel chair.

“Are you sure you’re five?” he blurts out, unable to suppress his own shock and startling them both. The little girl manoeuvres her chair so that she can face him and Barry feels his mouth go dry as he takes in her face.

He’s suddenly lost in her little green eyes.

[jazy3]

Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 16X21

I loved this episode! It finally happened! Hayes asked Meredith out and she said YES!!! I’m so happy right now! We're going to see them go on a date and have drinks next season! It’s all I could have hoped for and more! I can’t wait! This episode was a finale that wasn’t supposed to be a finale. With that in mind I wasn’t sure what to expect, but it was great! I loved this episode! Mainly because it delivered on the one thing I’d been hoping for since the mid season premiere! It didn’t have the usual shock factor that comes at the end of a planned Grey’s finale, but it was exciting and we got movement on pretty much all of the major storylines up to this point. It’s not where the cast and crew were planning to leave things for this season, but with the sudden onset of the COVID-19 virus and the mandatory shutdowns worldwide they were forced to halt production when filming for this episode had wrapped.

So with that in mind this episode leaves things in a pretty good place with some great set up for next season. Originally the shutdowns and the quarantine was supposed to be temporary and so I had hoped that they would be able to come back and film the remaining four episodes for this season as from what I’ve read the scripts have already been written and the plan was already in place. Unfortunately, since none of us know when the quarantine will end they have decided to roll those episodes into next season and rejig what would have been episode 16X22 to make it more exciting so that it can be the season opener for Season 17.

While I’m sad we won’t see the remaining four episodes as planned this hopefully means that there won’t be any filler episodes next seasons as they’ll rejig and add the four from this season and then write 21 new ones. So let’s talk about that scene with Meredith and Hayes! It was so so great! After hearing the news that she and the other doctors had finally found a diagnosis for Richard’s condition Hayes sought Meredith out as she was leaving for the night. He congratulated her on a great catch and asked her if she’d like to grab a drink with him and celebrate. She said yes, but said she was to exhausted to go out right now and asked her if he’d ask her again some other time. He said of course and told her he’d see her later and she said goodbye for the night.

There were so many things I loved about that scene! It was perfect! I loved that Hayes respected Meredith’s boundaries. He didn't push or try to change her mind. He understood what she was saying and accepted it. With any other love interest they’ve put her with that would have been a whole thing. They would have tried to change her mind or argued with her or tried to convince her and that’s not okay. But Hayes doesn’t do that. Why? Because he’s a mature adult who’s got his stuff together who understands the concept of consent and that yes, but not right now does not mean convince me.

I love that he's so understanding! He gets it! She's tired. She wants to go home and sleep, but she also wants to go out with him when she's feeling better and he wants that too! I can't wait to see them go out! I'm so happy. He's so smitten! Just the way he looks at her! And the way she looks at him! She's so into him! My heart! I love that they established that Hayes doesn’t like setups and he doesn’t even know that he’s in one right now! Jo’s sure not going to tell him. Where would be the fun in that? And he’s right that people are talking about his personal life when he’s not around. Specifically, the fact that Cristina sent him across the Atlantic and set him up with Meredith and everyone’s into it. I love it so much!

Also how deceiving was that episode description? “Hayes asks Meredith a surprising question.” It’s only surprising if you’ve never seen the show before or aren’t caught up on this season! Hayes has been into Meredith since he got to Seattle and Meredith has been into Hayes since they worked that Vaping case together. It’s very obvious in the googly heart eyes they keep making at each other all the time. I love that Hayes asking Meredith out was done in a subtle way with not a lot of fanfare. I really loved that. Because the episode description made it seem like it was going to be this big dramatic thing and I love that it wasn’t. Because real life is not like that. Real life is about the small moments. The intimate moments. The moments that matter. That come naturally when you build up a rapport with someone over time. And that’s what Meredith and Hayes have built.

I was also worried, especially after the Conference episode, that Hayes was still processing his grief in such a way that he wouldn’t feel comfortable asking Meredith out or that everything that’s been happening with DeLuca and now Richard would make him hesitant to ask her out or take the next step. Instead, we saw the opposite. Jo made comments about how him and Meredith would be good together and implied that other people thought so too. He heard about the nonsense that DeLuca had pulled yet again and he heard about what was going on with Richard and his eventual diagnosis. Instead of preventing him from asking her out it actually propelled him. He heard about what had happened with Richard, sought her out, offered his sympathies, congratulated her on a great catch. He then used that as a spring board to ask her out and in response she reciprocated his feelings and said yes! It was subtle, simple, and sweet. As it so often is in real life when you meet the right person.

I’m a big Taylor Swift fan and the slow burn they’ve created for Meredith and Hayes and the way he asked her out really reminded me of Taylor’s music and album journeys from reputation to Lover. The reputation album is about the death of Taylor’s reputation and her response to it. But as she has spoken about in interviews it’s also about a beautiful love story. It’s about how in some of her darkest times she found and formed the most beautiful and amazing relationship with her partner Joe. There’s this undercurrent running through the album about that relationship as it begins. Then in Lover it blossoms fully and we get to hear all about it and how great finding that kind of whole hearted love really is.

To me there is such a great parallel between that musical journey and the relationship we see forming between Meredith and Hayes. It’s this beautiful undercurrent that’s forming amidst the constant chaos that is Meredith’s life and that’s a wonderful thing. It’s this steady current in the background that once given the chance to fully bloom will blossom into this beautiful thing. I’m excited that we’ll get to see that next season. Hayes was back in a big way this episode and I loved it! I love him as a character. I really hope they make him a series regular next season because he is great and he needs more screen time. The female patient Daya who couldn’t express emotion or smile because of her condition and needed facial surgery was hilarious! 

I'm really glad that they figured out what was wrong with Richard and he's on the mend! I'm glad Richard kicked Catherine out. She deserved that and in fairness to him he doesn't remember her being there. It looks like he doesn't remember anything prior to the Conference so I get why he's mad. He was also real petty about it and I loved that. Although I was surprised that Meredith wasn't in his room with Maggie and Jackson and Catherine at the end.

She’s his family too and up until he married Catherine she was he’s next of kin, his emergency contact, and had medical power of attorney. Catherine’s left him and was MIA prior to him getting sick, Richard didn’t even know that Maggie existed until a few years ago, and Jackson had barely spoken to the man until Maggie pointed out that Richard thought he was taking Catherine’s side in the divorce. Side note: I’m glad that Maggie and Winston are still texting! Steamily I might add! He should definitely move to Seattle next season!

DeLuca annoyed the crap out of me this episode not because he was wrong, but because of the way he chose to express his opinions as usual. He was right but instead of explaining that calmly to others he screamed at Richard's family and threw a bunch of sharp surgical instruments onto the OR floor while Richard was on the table. I really hope they write him off next season because he annoys the crap out of me, he still hasn’t picked a speciality yet, and I feel they’ve gone as far as they can with his character and then some.

As for that end scene with Meredith and DeLuca here’s how I saw it. I didn't see it as her going home with him. I saw it as she was on her way home when she found him crying on the floor and either drove him home or admitted him for treatment. They established that Carina's back in Seattle so I think she either she drove him home and then called Carina to come take care of her brother or got him admitted and then called her to follow up and then went home and got some well deserved sleep.

I'm glad that he's finally acknowledged that he's got a problem and needs help. That's the first time since he started behaving erratically that we've seen that so that's good. I hope Carina can get him some help and get him admitted somewhere or that Meredith already has. More and more I see the interactions between Meredith and DeLuca as motherly. She’s clearly concerned about him and feels guilty because he went to jail for her and is now failing apart. I hope they write him off next season, but if they don’t I hope he gets the treatment he needs and they both move on or they remain in each other’s lives on a friendly co-worker basis as that’s the only time they ever really work on screen in my opinion. They don’t have chemistry romantically or as friends. I loved that moment in the OR where Bokhee prayed over Richard! Bokhee for the win!

Teddy was a hot mess as usual! I knew the truth was going to come out eventually, but I did not expect that god damn! I'm not an Owen fan, but that scene in the supply closet was still a gut punch. Oof! I loved Tom's speech to Teddy and how he called her out on the fact that she was running into marrying Owen rather than confront her own confused feelings. Teddy really needs to figure out what she wants and pick a lane! I hated the fact that she had sex with Tom in his office and then when he said let's run away together she told him this was goodbye and she was marrying Owen. Who does that? No matter what side you are on here Teddy’s behaviour is just not okay! Oy vey! 

I’m glad that Owen stood her up and cancelled the wedding. It’s bad enough that she’s engaged to Owen and carrying on an affair with Tom, but the fact that she had sex with Tom in his office on the day of her wedding and then had the audacity to tell him that was goodbye and she was marrying Owen when she is clearly conflicted is an awful thing to do to everyone. She’s literally hurting all parties involved and that’s just awful. Also how is she planning on explaining this to her kids when they’re older?

Amelia and Link we're super cute this episode! I'm glad that their baby is okay and healthy and that Amelia is okay after what happened with her first pregnancy. She’s been through enough and it looks like she’s finally getting something good in her life with a beautiful new baby and a healthy pregnancy and delivery and a wonderful supportive partner. The throwback to Bailey being there for Amelia like George was there for her was so beautiful! Kudos to Bailey for showing all that strength after she suffered a miscarriage recently!

I'm glad we got to see Bailey spend time with Richard as I felt that was missing last episode. Carina was great in this episode! She has so much potential as a character and I wish they would use her more. She’s such a badass and her facial expressions are always on point. Although I only watch Station 19 sporadically these days I love her relationship with Maya. I’m not an Andrew DeLuca fan at all and I would love if they would start focusing on her more and move her brother back into the background or off the show entirely.

Jo was hilarious! I’m glad she’s getting her spunk back. She reminds me in a lot of ways of Amelia from her early Private Practice days. I loved her comments to Jackson in the OR! Real talk though, what do you think Jackson’s dating profile pic would be? Jet or Yacht? Comment below! Also I love that Jo is so team MerWidow! She totally ships them together! And she's helping to make it happen! Go Jo!

I love how she almost spilled the beans to Hayes about Cristina setting him and Meredith up but then stopped when she realized he didn't know and didn't like set ups. I'm glad she did. Because if she'd said something further then Hayes might not have asked Meredith out. I feel like by the time the truth comes out Meredith and Hayes will already have been dating for a while so he'll be annoyed, but it won't change the way he feels about Meredith. Although let’s be honest nothing could he’s so smitten and he should be! Meredith is amazing and she deserves an amazing man like Hayes.

I saw someone on Twitter comment that it looks like the storyline with Meredith and Hayes beginning to date and the truth coming out about how Cristina set them up was supposed to play out in the next few episodes and I think that’s true. I’m sorry we won’t get to see it this season because of the shutdown but I’m really excited to see this play out next season. Something that did surprise me is that the character interactions in this episode imply that Jo didn’t tell Meredith about what DeLuca did to her and tried to do to her at the bar in the episode ‘Life on Mars’ and still hasn’t told her. I’m surprised by that because Meredith and Jo are friends, what DeLuca did was disgusting and unforgivable, and Jo clearly hasn’t forgotten. In fact in this very episode she made it super clear to Hayes that she detests DeLuca and hates the idea of him and Meredith together and so do others.

This once again brings to light the big problem with DeLuca in that the only reason Meredith went out with him, continued to date him, and continues to interact with him out of concern is because her friends and family aren't being completely honest with her about his behaviour and how he acts when she’s not around. Because let’s face it. If Meredith knew what DeLuca was really like when she wasn’t there she wouldn’t give that asshole the time of day. I can’t emphasize this enough. Your friends and family should be able to be honest with you about the person you’re dating and anyone that’s in your life. They should feel comfortable being honest with you and telling you how they feel. They shouldn’t have to hid the worst parts of them in order to protect you or so that you can be happy. I also don’t get how anyone can ship Meredith and DeLuca together or want him to continue to be a part of her life when he treats the people she loves so horribly and they openly detest him so much.

I’m sorry we have to wait so long to find out what happens next to our heroes. But I am very much looking forward to next season and watching Meredith and Hayes develop further!

Until next time!

[mymelodyheart]

Highland Destiny Chapter 14 ~Unscripted Love~

"Wot?" Claire gasped as she stared at Jaime, wide eyes and unblinking. Her mind was racing, flitting from past recent events to an unknown possible future and then back. So many things have transpired in the last five weeks, that she hadn't really had time to catch her breath, let alone wrap her head around the unexpected news of her pregnancy.  

And now this? If I keep this up, I'll have 10 kids before I'm 40! Jesus H.Roosevelt Christ!

"Sassenach, I asked...if ye will be my wife?" Jamie whispered softly, his forehead furrowed in anticipation, as he waited on tenterhooks for an answer.

Avoiding his eyes, Claire bolted right up, pushed the bed covers aside and got out of bed. "I need to go to the loo," she muttered, hurrying before Jamie could say another word. Inhaling deeply, she closed the door and leaned against it.  

One little two little three little Indians, four little five little six little Indians...,  Claire sang in her head to calm her nerves. It was something she did since she was a child whenever she was anxious or nervous. 

When she could finally move, she turned on the tap and lathered heaps of soap on her hands, trying to remove Jamie's ring.

There was a soft knock on the door. "Sassenach? Ye alright?" Before she could answer, Jamie came in. "Ye shouldn't be running like that...ye need to slow down now that ye're pregnant," looking her over with concerned eyes.

"I'm a few weeks pregnant for crying out loud, not nine months. So stop treating me like I'm incapacitated!" Claire snapped without looking at him, focused on removing the jewellery.

Jamie frowned as he realised what she was trying to do. "Maybe yer fingers are swollen...I read last night that pregnancy causes that. Perhaps that's why ye can't remove the ring."

She turned to face him, golden eyes blazing and face beet red. "Are you trying to tell me that I'm fat, James Fraser?"

"No, that's not what I was saying," he said calmly, leaning on the doorframe, arms across his chest, his hair tousled from sleep or lack of. "Sassenach, are ye grumpy at me?" he asked gently, trying to suppress his amusement.

"No! I'm not grumpy at all!" Claire huffed in annoyance, as she gave up removing the ring, turning her back to him to wipe her hands on the towel.

Sighing deeply, Jaime uncrossed his arms and walked over to her. Slowly turning her around, he tilted her head back with one hand and asked, "Do ye not want to marry me, Sassenach?"

"I never said that!" she retorted, trying to avert her eyes from his intense scrutiny. After a few moments of silence, she softened, releasing a long pent up breath, "Jamie, I'm so sorry. It's just that...I can hardly keep up with all the things going on. These last five weeks ...I was nearly burned alive...I've been assaulted by your uncle...I've been drugged...I was almost raped...then I find out I'm pregnant and you dropped the bomb and asked me to marry you...It's all too much, and I'm still ..."

"Ssshh...I'm so sorry too," hushing her gently as he took her into his arms, tenderly stroking her hair and back. "If we could start all over again, I ken there are things I would like to change. I wish I could have been more forthright with ye from the beginning. Then perhaps some of the things that happened wouldn't have happened. But I can't change the past, Sassenach, but I would verra much like to make it up to ye, if ye would allow me to. That is why I thought Skye would be a great idea...there will be just us. No work, no distractions, no places to go to...just us. There, we can start all over. I'm so sorry for putting the ring in yer finger...I wasn't planning on asking ye today...I only wanted to see if it fitted ye. I feel so foolish now."

"You didn't intend to ask me?" Claire asked, puckering her eyebrows.

"Och, I do want to marry ye Sassenach." He leaned down to briefly kiss her on the lips. "That's if ye'll have me. I know now asking ye today was lousy timing. We can marry anytime ye want...tomorrow, in ten years, whenever...I can wait. I thought maybe ye didna wish to marry me because ye were married before...to Frank. If that's the case, I wouldn't mind as long as I'm with ye." He paused, swallowing audibly, trying to find the right words. "The first time I laid eyes on you, I knew I wanted ye...more than anything I have ever wanted in my life. And when ye walked in at the Station, the day of the general meeting, I've loved ye ever since." He moved closer, his breath warm on her face. "I love ye with all my heart Claire, and I tell ye the truth when I say, I have never said those words to any woman before." He paused. "Weel...except to my ma and my sister...and now I'm saying it to ye." He smiled broadly, placing both her hands on his chest.

"Jaime..." she was unsure what to say, trying to find reason and logic to grasp onto.

Taking her right hand, he looked at the ring on Claire's finger, before bringing it to his lips to kiss it. "Do ye really mind wearing it, Sassenach? It looks so pretty on ye...it matches yer eyes."

Gazing at her hand, she had to agree it did look quite fetching. "It is beautiful, Jaime...I love it. But our friends are bound to ask questions when they see this on my finger...not that I mind wearing it." She frowned slightly, pursing her lips.

"Weel, ye dinna exactly say no when I asked ye to marry me...do ye think ye can picture us married in the future? Besides..." Both Jaime's hands reached out to her stomach, "...we have the wee bairn to think about as well."

"I suppose so..." she replied, biting her lip. After a short contemplation, she gazed directly into Jamie's eyes, and what she saw was the baring of his soul and the promise of an unflagging love. Her heart soared, astounded that this beautiful specimen of a man, can open his heart in all its rawness, exposed and unafraid. It was there for the taking, waiting for her to claim it. Whatever control and self-preservation she had left, it was rapidly slipping away, and it was no longer a matter of choice. "Yes, Jaime...I can see us together," she admitted.

"Weel, if ye can do that, see yersel' married to me, and ye not minding wearing my ring, is it so difficult to say yes to my marriage proposal?" he asked. It was a question that was undemanding of nature, nor was it an attempt to challenge her reservations. Not waiting for her to reply, he gathered her into his arms for a long tender kiss...a kiss that spoke from the heart.

Claire, feeling intoxicated by the feel of his hard body against her, yielded, surrendering to her own feelings and urges, releasing whatever doubts and fear she had. Slowly she responded fervently to Jamie with all her being, twining her arms around his neck, pulling him closer until they moulded together as one, fitting perfectly and in harmony. She realised then and there, that she couldn't imagine life without him as the stirring in her belly renewed, an acknowledgement to their love waiting to be born. In her heart of hearts, Claire found their moment in forever, like this was how they should have always been. Without any more further thoughts, she conceded. "Yes, Jamie, I want to marry you." The moment Claire uttered those words, a sense of deliverance took over her, just like the feeling after a confessional rite when a priest absolves past sins.

Jamie raised his head to gaze into her eyes, his face a picture of bliss and ecstasy, making her heart skip a beat. "And I, you Sassenach. And I can't wait to have ye to myself once we're in Skye."

Claire raised an eyebrow, nuzzling her face at the base of his throat. "Really? And what are your plans?"

Sliding down his hands to fondle her arse, he whispered into her ears, "I plan to have ye naked with yer hair all wild and loose...and I will make verra slow love to ye, kissing every inch of yer body until ye forget yer name."

"Is that so?"

"Aye, that is so." And then he kissed her some more, to give her a taste of his promise that is to come. 

..........

It was difficult to leave the hospital immediately. There were papers to be signed for Claire's release, police statement to be made, and to delay things further, she had a few belated visits from Geillis, Joe and her colleagues at work, much to Jaime's growing impatience. Although overwhelmed with the attention, she found it very amusing to see strapping and burley firemen bearing gifts in the form of pink stuffed toys, balloons and flowers. Even the dour-looking Murtagh didn't disappoint.

"Here," said Murtagh gruffly, handing her a giant box of chocolate truffles before leaning forward for a quick awkward hug. "See ye in two weeks, bright and early."

Before she could say thank you, Geillis let out a high-pitch screech making everyone in the room jump. "Oh my God, oh my God! Claire! Let me see that!" She grabbed Claire's right hand, raising it for everyone to see the engagement ring.

Flabbergasted, everyone stared open-mouthed at Jamie, eagerly awaiting for him to say something.

Red-faced, Jamie shrugged, giving Claire an apprehensive look and a weak smile, and before he could think, he blurted out, "We're having a baby!"

"What?" Everyone exclaimed simultaneously in astonishment, except Joe who knew already and was shaking his head in amusement.

This time everyone's eyes were on Claire. "Oh, Jamie!" she groaned, slightly annoyed that he announced her pending pregnancy. She didn't want anyone knowing until they were very sure the baby was safe from the effects of the drugs she ingested.

Unaffected with everyone's reaction and silence, Geillis was shrieking in delight, jumping up and down, clapping her hands before hugging Claire, Jamie, and then Claire again, both of them collapsing on the bed. "Och, Claire, I'm so happy for ye... cannae believe our wee fox cub is off the market... and ye, my pet, I cannae wait to spoil yer wee red-headed curly top bairn," she squealed ecstatically.

Tension and surprise soon were replaced by hearty congratulations, back-slapping and bear hugs, and Claire and Jamie began to relax and revel in sharing their happiness.

"Aah, a right Fraser ye are, my lad," one of the men shouted, "Ye dinna waste time do ye, getting one of our best worker up the duff." The statement was followed by roaring laughter, making Claire blush profusely.

"Weel, I cannae help it...she pursued me day and night, ye ken, and I cannae deny a beautiful lass," Jamie replied jokingly, before giving Claire a sloppy kiss on the cheek.

"Is that right, Fraser? Ever since Beauchamp arrived, ye were never away from the station. Ye didna give the rest of the lads a chance," Hugh teased, giving his friend a nudge on his arms.

"Och, it's the Fraser charm, lads," Geillis said, joining in with the banter before turning to Claire and Jamie. "So do we have a wedding date yet?"

Claire smiled shyly looking at Jamie, "No, we haven't talked about any dates yet..."

"I'm hoping verra soon, before the bairn is born," Jamie interrupted, overlooking the delicate matter of the fetus' precarious state.

Before more questions could be asked, Joe decided to intervene, after noticing Claire's slight discomfort. "Right lads, let's leave the lovebirds for now. They have a holiday to go to, and you'll see them back soon enough."

Collectively nodding in agreement, everyone said their good-byes, congratulations and good luck before they left one by one leaving Jamie and Claire once more on their own. It took almost twenty minutes for everyone to disperse, and both were relieved once everyone was gone.

"How are ye Sassenach? It wasna so bad, was it?" He asked, taking her hand in his.

"No, not at all," she replied, facing him and putting her arms around his waist, before laying her head on his chest. "I'm happy."

"That's good...I want ye to be happy," he whispered, kissing the top of her head. 

.........

At the cottage, Jamie took the brown envelope Claire had given him a few days ago from the coffee table and headed for the bedroom where she was busy packing for their leave. He stood there watching her for a moment, as she went through the wardrobe and drawers picking out clothes and throwing them onto the bed. He loved watching her, especially when she was unaware or distracted.

He cleared his throat to get her attention. "Sassenach, do ye have a moment?" When she turned around to face him, he raised the envelope with his hand. "I want to talk about this."

"Oh, Jamie...do we have to? Can't it wait until we come back," she asked half-heartedly.

He sighed. "Claire, I don't want to go into details about it. All I want to know is why?"

Giving in, she walked over to him and took the envelope from his hand and placed it on the nearby chair. Wrapping her arms around his waist, she replied, "Because I wanted to, and it was the right thing."

Unconvinced, he shook his head. "That's no' a reason, Sassenach."

Claire released him and went back to folding clothes. "Well, if you must know, Château Cheval Blanc was never mine to have in the first place as well as the many stocks, bonds and shares Frank left behind. When my father-in-law made his will, I was never in his mind. It was all meant to be for Frank and future children we would have. Nobody could have predicted Frank would die so young and having no other family to pass on Frank's inheritance, I inherited my father-in-law's wealth...I guess by default. De Marillac's shares were Frank's father's shares, and I inherited it by some loophole in the legalities of the will. When I accidentally found out you were Jared Fraser's nephew and that you were trying to buy-out the other shareholders, it was a no-brainer decision to sign them over to you. It belongs to your family Jamie, and I have no right to it."

Jamie's face was expressionless as he strode towards her. Taking the garment she was folding off her hand, he turned her around to face him. "Sassenach, ye still haven't answered my question," he said in a warning tone. "I already know all that. What I want to know is why."

She fidgeted on her feet and lowered her head, refusing to look at him. "Well, after the incident at the charity ball, I didn't know how you felt about me. Thinking that you would have moved out from here after the stunt Annalise pulled, I didn't want to have anything that belonged to you or anything that would remind me of you."

"Ye could have used the money..."

"Jamie, I am financially stable, and I've always led a simple life, a legacy from growing up with my Uncle Lamb. I do not need much, and I'm quite comfortable...really."

"Sassenach, but why?" His hands were tight on her shoulders as if by gripping any harder, he could force the real truth out.

"Jamie, I already told you why, for fuck sake!" she glared at him, gritting her teeth in exasperation.

"No, ye haven't," he replied stubbornly, standing his ground.

Claire suddenly panicked. She knew there was no way out, and the last vestiges of the secret she held close to her heart were about to be exposed, leaving her naked and vulnerable, and Jamie was not about to give up. She wanted to resist, but inside she was crumbling and disintegrating fast, like the stone quarries of Egypt when the dynamite was detonated, leaving fragments of stones scattered to the ground.

Suddenly, she fell on her knees, hands on her face, and her shoulder slumped. Whatever fortification she had built, it was all gone. "The reason why I did what I did is that because I love you, damn it!" she sobbed, her voice cracking. " I love you James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser or whoever you are."

Jamie quickly got down on his knees and took her into his arms, his heart pounding and rejoicing in a chorus. It was what he had wanted to hear and not the drug talking.

"Sssh Sassenach, I love ye too,  mo chridhe.  There's the two of us now...ye're no longer alone. Hush now, everything will be alright." He cradled her tight against him, wiping her tears away until there were no more tears to be shed.

For the longest time, they both clung onto one another, not saying a word, two souls stirring in a most subtle way as the story between them finally began to write itself.

[acdeaky]

the end of the night

warning: fluff, angst, use of strong language, dialogue heavy at parts

note: happy secret santa to @yourlocalmusicalprostitute ! here's a fic with joe, even though i know you said about wanting john! i couldn’t put john with the idea i had, so i went with joe! i hope you enjoy, mwah 💋

word count: 2.0k

the last year of your life had been one of the best for your career and your personal life. you and joe had celebrated your two year anniversary with a special trip to paris. after news got out that you were to be in a highly anticipated film being released in december, you had half a dozen auditions for new projects, two of which you got accepted for. 

the year previous had been amazing for you as well, especially the second half. filming began on your first main role in a movie and to say you were excited was an understatement. you were ecstatic. joe helped you through sleepless nights filled with nerves and/or excitement, he spent countless days on set with you and kept you company on your breaks, as well as doing his job too. 

somehow, each day you two spent together throughout the past two years, you had fallen more in love with joe - something which you didn't think would be possible. but it happened. and the excitement of your premiere caught up with you throughout the press tour. and, once again, joe was there by your side for every moment. 

you’d enjoyed filming and promoting this movie that you forgot about the christmas release date. throughout the entire month of december, running up to christmas that is, you felt like you’d done nothing but work. it slipped your mind that the days to christmas were counting down, until it got to the premiere.

december 19th: you and your cast mates were lined up along the red carpet, smiling and waving at the cameras. joe was by your side the whole night. he chatted with you and the interviewers and watched as your face lit up while meeting and talking to fans. you both were in a state of bliss that night, smiling and getting along with your cast mates.

but after the joy had settled and everyone had gone home or back to their hotels, it was a different story.

stumbling into your hotel suite, you and joe giggled hysterically, the amount of alcohol you had had finally taking affect. you had shown him something on your phone in the lift and both of you were still laughing at it. it wasn’t that funny, but joe was trying to keep you happy before saying what he wanted to say.

“i’m gonna hop in the shower,” you managed to say through light giggles, pulling off your shoes and then carefully tried to unzip your dress from the back. “do you wanna join?”

“no, love, i’ll let you have one.” joe smiled, walking over to help you.

“if you’re sure, baby.” joe only nodded in reply as you glanced over your shoulder. the zip of your dress was down at the bottom after joe helped and you easily slid out of the short sleeves and let the dress rest in a puddle at your feet.

stepping out of it, joe reached down to grab it, holding it delicately and laying it across the back of the sofa of the suite. as a thank you, you kissed his cheek lightly, resting your hand on his blazer clad shoulder.

“don’t worry about taking this off and joining me at any point, joey. i’ve missed you,” your hand moved down from his shoulder over the lapels on his blazer. the fabric was soft, good quality shit, and running your thumb over the front brought you back to earth. “i won’t be too long.” and with that you turned around from him, waltzing into the oversized bathroom and stripping off the rest of your clothes before stepping into the shower. 

joe never joined you. he stayed inside the bedroom of the suite and took off his blazer, laying it over the sofa next to your dress. he toed off his shoes and placed them next to yours which had been carelessly thrown at the foot of the bed. his tie joined his blazer over the sofa, but joe kept his shirt and trousers on, not fully ready to undress just yet. 

there was something he had to do. 

just like you had said, you weren't too long. you dried off in the bathroom, sneaking into the bedroom to grab some pyjamas and quickly getting changed. after hanging the towels up, you stepped back into the bedroom, pulling the fluffed up white covers back and called to joe. 

“baby? are you coming?” was all you said. joe suddenly appear from the living area of the suite, his once crisp white shirt now slightly creased and untucked from his trousers. “i thought you'd be ready for bed?” you asked sweetly, snuggling further down into the sheets and silently beckoning him to bed. 

“i will, i will, i just- i need to talk to you a minute.” joe just sat on the same side of the bed as you, his fingers and thumbs twiddling as he tried to calm himself. 

“joey, what's wrong? has something happened? are you okay?” a million thoughts and questions raced through your head. the silence coming from him was the first thing that worried you; joe was barely ever quiet. 

“im fine, love, i just wanted to talk to you about something.” joe’s head was still down, his voice coming out at almost a whisper. before you even replied, you shifted forward, grabbing one of his hands and placed it in-between both of yours. all of your attention was on him now; his posture and attitude worrying you, his behaviour extremely unusual. 

“okay,” you said with a shaky breath. “go for it.” 

“i love you. so so much. and you know this, but i just wanted to say it. these past few weeks, hell these past two years, i’ve be so unbelievably proud of you, of what you're achieving and what you've achieved. but honestly? i miss you, a lot. like, a hell of a lot. you’ve been there, of course you’ve been there, but you haven’t been here completely. part of your mind has always been thinking go work, or the next step, and i feel like we’ve not spent time together like we have done before. christmas is in less than a week and the minimal amount of presents we’ve bought is ridiculous. and i'm not blaming you, i never would. god, i can't blame you when you’ve been caught up in work because that's your job, it’s what you do.” joe had to breathe for a minute. he still hadn't looked up, his eyes were still fixed on where your hands were encasing his. 

“as much as there's been an us lately, there also hasn't. the bed feels empty even when you're in it next to me. the house seems quiet even when you’re downstairs rehearsing to watching TV. there's just been something not right and i didn't want to say anything earlier because i wanted you to enjoy celebrating the movie, because you should, instead of thinking and worrying about what i've said. i'm not trying to make you feel bad or guilty, because i just couldn't do that to you, but i just had to say this. i had to say something.” 

“fuck, i'm so sorry.” was the first thing joe said when he finally looked up at you. you knew exactly why. your face was definitely a deeper shade of red to match your bloodshot eyes. there had definitely been at least three tears that marked your face and fallen onto the cotton sheets below. joe knew what you looked like when you cried, he had seen it happen so many times before. but every time that happened, the first thing he would do would be pulling you into his arms, a hand stroking the back of your head as he whispered sweet nothings into your ear. 

this time, though, he did none of that. just like you, his eyes were bloodshot and there was guilt behind them. you saw it as soon as he looked up at you. you think that was why he pulled his hand from between yours and shot up so quickly. his hands ran through his hair, pulling it this way and that way. 

you sat motionless on the bed. your hands were still where joe’s left them, your face was in a state of shock, in fact, your whole body was. the only sounds came from joe’s laboured breathing and the few outside noises of cars and noisy pedestrians passing by outside. 

that wasn't what you were expecting. 

it wasn't what joe was expecting. 

but it happened. 

it took a few minutes for you and joe to come out of your heads and acknowledge each other, it was your short sniffles that brought you back to earth. joe’s movements stilled as he faced where you sat on the bed. his eyes were even more bloodshot than before and his hair was so dishevelled. all you want to do was reach out and kiss his tear stains away, but that wouldn't work this time. 

“you don't need to be sorry,” came your broken voice, disrupting the near silence in the room. “you're right. i’ve been so interested in work and this movie and movie forward in my career that i forgot about everything else. i’m sorry i haven't been here as often, or as present as i should be, like i used to be. without realising it, it’s just happened. and i’m sorry, joe. i’m sorry i haven't been there properly, or fully. i’m sorry for making you worried and making you feel like this. seeing you like this just breaks my heart. and it’s all my fault.”

joe stayed stood there, taking in the words you said and the sight before him. after everything tonight, after all the laughter and love received by the both of you, the end of the night turned into something out of your personal nightmares. without saying a word, joe finally move forward. his body practically crashed onto the bed and he pulled you into his arms once again. he sat with his legs over the bed, pulling you onto his lap and wrapping his arms around you. 

“its not your fault, it’s not.” he whispered over and over again in your ear, his hand stroking the back of your head. both of you stayed there for what seemed like hours, crying into the other’s shoulder and readjusting your grips periodically. 

“i love you so so much, and we’ll figure this out together, yeh?” joe whispered into your ear after a few moments of silence. at some point, he begun rocking you backwards and forward, settling your crying and calming your breathing. no words could leave your mouth, making you nod your head in agreement. “lets get you back into bed.” 

joe’s movements were slow as he lifted you off of his lap and into the sheets. he helped you lay down fully before pulling the sheets over the rest of your body. instantly, you snuggled down into them, making yourself comfy and waited for joe to join you. he finally removed his shirt, placing it and his trousers over the back of the sofa. joe didn't even bother changing into his pyjamas; all he did was pull out his pair of sweatpants, pulled them on and crawled into the bed next to you. 

as soon as he settled, he pulled you close to him. your chests were pressed together as his arms rested around your waist and your arms rested are his shoulders. it was the low sounds of joe’s breathing and his sweet nothings that sent you off to sleep. just before you fell asleep, you made a mental note to be more present, to be there for joe when he needed you. 

an “i love you.” was whispered just before you fell asleep. 

that night could be classed as one of your bests and one of your worsts, but with joe there by your side for the whole thing, nothing else compared (even if you did end up crying one way or another). 

- 

TAGLIST: @never-kept-the-same-address @j0hn-deaky @sohoneyspreadyourwings @brian-maybe-not @deakysbabybooty @1001-yellow-daffodils @retromusicsalad @hardcoredisneynerd @painkiller80 @leatherjacketmazzello @scarecrowmax @mebeatlized @seesiderendezvous @alright-mrfahrenheit @someone-get-a-medic​ @miamideacon​ @chlobo6​ @teenagepeterpan​ @spacedustmazzello​ @deakysgurl @forever-rogue @xcdelilahxc @keepsdrawing​ @igotsuckedintothevoid @kill4hqueen​ @supersonicfreddie​ @laedymoon @inthedayswhenlandswerefew @warriorteam1924​ @painandpleasure86 @boomerangbassist @mamaskillerqueen 

[mccoys-killer-queen]

This Week’s Playlist (2/14)

Not sure how I got hooked on this idea- but this week I’ll be focusing entirely on 70s songs (and next week I’ll do 80s). Disclaimer: I’m not saying these are my favorite songs of the 70s (believe me that would be WAYYY too hard to narrow down), I’m just filling this week’s list strictly with songs released in the 70s.

I’ve also created a spotify playlist made up of all the songs I’ve used on playlists! I’ll update it every week (before I even post the playlist, so if you check at the right time the songs will be there!)

1.) London Calling- The Clash (1979) I like to define this song as the song that started my descent into classic rock. When I was in 7th grade I had this music teacher who would always play pop music of the late 20th century for class. This song was one of the first songs she showed us, and it became a trademark of the class. We used to get this song played at dances and stuff- so there’s a lot of middle school memory there. Guess we all wanted to be punks- and this is a great boppy song just for that.

2.) All Right Now- Free (1970) Am I being typical for picking this song...? Perhaps (because honestly, at least where I’m from, this is the only Free song anyone knows... yikes. It’s overused in media sometimes imo). But that doesn’t meant it’s not great! It’s got everything! An epic guitar riff that frames the lyrics, a sick beat, funny rhymes, a killer musical interlude with bangin piano and a guitar solo- all while being undeniably CHILL. This one of those chill summer songs to me; the kind you listen to on a hot, quiet, and sunny car ride through the country with the windows down while wearing sunglasses. That’s just the aesthetic I’ve always associated with this song.

3.) Rock’n Me- Steve Miller Band (1976) Just try not to bop. I dare you. This is a real dance-a-little-in-your-seat song with a GREAT, smooth flow to it. Killer rhymes and a fast, subtle beat you can’t avoid even if you try. Steve Miller Band is one of my favorite groups of the 70s and I wish they got more appreciation in general. I could’ve picked so many of their songs already for these playlists, but this one stood out to me this week because I feel like it’s very recognizable (I always heard this song as a kid and I feel like maybe some people on here did too). It’s so damn catchy that it’ll just stick with you, so listen and get ready for an earworm. Also a great road trip song.

4.) Once Bitten, Twice Shy- Ian Hunter (1975) No, this isn’t Great White!! This is the song we all know and love but this one’s the original! I feel like I need to educate anyone who’ll listen about this! *scoff* god, now I can see why Joe Elliott’s always shoving Ian Hunter in everyone’s faces- because he’s worth it! Maybe I’m a little biased, but I personally prefer this version over Great White’s for a bunch of different reasons. For one thing, I think this version focuses more on telling the story rather than trying to make the music over the top. The instrumentals of this one ROCK, but the way it’s constructed with the lyrics makes the story more understandable- essentially, it’s just more raw, and I like the raw sound to it, but that’s just me. You all probably know how the song goes at this point, but after listening to this version you’ll see just how much of it Great White changed. You take it upon yourself to decipher the meaning of the lyrics ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I think we all know what “rock and roll” means at this point...

5.) Lovin’, Touchin’, Squeezin’- Journey (1979) I don’t like to acknowledge Valentine’s Day, nor was I going to mention it in any way on this playlist- but let me tell you a story: last year on VD, I was driving home from school, and this song came on the radio. Then it hit me- I had completely forgotten about ANTI-Valentine’s Day songs! This is a PERFECT example of one. It tells of an unfaithful someone who gets bitten in the ass by someone else’s unfaithfulness. Talk about a SICK burn! This has gotta be my favorite Journey song as well. It’s like a flash-fiction song; telling a huge story while barely saying anything at all. My favorite part of this song by far is how each instrument has a crystal clear part, and you can very easily pick out each one. The intro of this song is just excellent. You can clearly hear the bass, drums, guitars, and piano all introduced in different ways. It’s just a gorgeous song through and through, and those 189 “na”s at the end just tie it all together (and yes, I counted). You’ll have all the words down before you know it.

6.) You’re All I’ve Got Tonight- The Cars (1978) Like I said last week, The Cars are one of the perfect combos of rock and pop. If you think about it, this one can be another anti-Valentine’s Day song. The lyrics have a sloppy and desperate feel to them- kinda like the speaker is drunk and throwing themselves at someone because they’re that desperate. “I don’t care if you hurt me some more, I don’t care if you even the score”- like oof man, you just sound desperate. This song is a banger in every way and let’s face it- the keyboard at the chorus is just the absolute best part. Strong points for these guys are always keyboards and guitars. It’s got this rock hard chill 80s vibe to it (despite it being a 70s song- new wave, you know), you’ll feel that you need to be doing something cool while listening to it.

7.) Rock and Roll- Led Zeppelin (1971) It’s so cliche of me to use this I know I know I KNOW- but can you blame me? On Sunday in a record booth at the market I found an original Zeppelin IV and I feel like this song has been following me all week because of it. This is unarguably one the most recognizable and famous rock songs of all time- because it was so expertly crafted in every way imaginable- just like everything else Zeppelin’s ever done. It’s ALWAYS the drums that do it for me in this song. l That filler at the end is- without question- the best part of the whole song. Bonzo just KILLS it. Overall, it’s a short-ish song that uses its time extremely well; it’s like all four of them went “let’s maximize every single element that goes into a bop, and make a song like that”. In some ways, this song is objectively perfect. If you want pure rock and roll in all its glory- what better song to choose than Rock and Roll itself?

8.) Keep Yourself Alive- Queen (1973) Another objectively perfect rock and roll song with a killer drum solo. I’m super biased towards Queen- but I cannot believe I never heard of this song until I was prepping my brain to see Bohemian Rhapsody! Honestly, who thinks it’s okay to keep this hidden? It’s the leading song off of their very first album- so this is almost like the song that INVENTED Queen fans! It’s a Brian May baby- and hell yeah does it show. I think everyone needs to know this song for artistic and historical reasons. It’s pure, power rock Queen through and through- despite being one of the earliest of their songs.

9.) Cum On Feel the Noize- Slade (1973) NO, it’s not Quiet Riot!! This is the song we all know and love but this one’s the original!! Again, I feel like I need to educate anyone who’ll listen about this! I get so angry sometimes that Quiet Riot gets all the credit for songs like this one and Mama Weer All Crazee now. Slade was super popular in England in the 70s- ahead of their time for sure but definitely one with the glam rock movement- but not as big in America. I never knew these guys existed until about five years ago and damn I felt like I had to be blind before learning that. Just listen to this song and then I think the sound of it’ll make a lot more sense, like “oh yeah- Quiet Riot’s version kinda DOES sound like it could be a glam rock song from the early 70s!” Just goes to show what geniuses these guys were, because their songs can be both glam rock AND heavy metal and work either way. Once you hear this version, though, I believe there’s no going back.

10.) Roll With the Changes- REO Speedwagon (1978) This was my favorite song for a few months when I was 16- it’s absolutely EPIC. The speaker is bursting at the seams with accepting a new found moral understanding of how they feel about trying to please or win over an apparent lover. They come to the conclusion that the other person just needs to keep on “rolling with the changes” and that they’ll be there for them whenever they decide to accept that perspective. The KEYBOARD is to D I E  F O R GUYS. Neal Doughty is a motherfucking SAINT- and SO IS GARY RICHRATH. This song sounds like it’s the finale of a musical or something! Possibly the biggest bop REO has ever created. It’s a groovy, extremely poetic, fast, theatrical, very slightly operatic rock and roll song and I’d highly recommend this to any person on the planet I love it that much. It’s lovable in every possible way.

[marnivanross]

★ have you seen [ MARNI VANROSS ] since the storm? some say they look like [ zoey deutch ] but they’re [ 21 ]  & go by [ THE SKEPTIC ]. [ she’s ] lived in halloway for [ 12 years ] & they are originally from [ LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA]. before the town vanished they were studying [ astronomy ] and lived at [ UNI BLVD ]. most people knew the [ CISFEMALE ] as [ + INTELLIGENT ] but i’ve heard they can also be [ - COLD ]. for some reason, they feel [ uneasy ] about the town’s disappearance. ( pepper, twenty three, s he/her, est )

ABOUT THE MUN.  what is that? that freaky thing? yes, that’s right, it’s a naked mole rat.

hello all, my name is pepper and what you’re about to see is about to be peak mediocrity. i am usually pretty decent at intros but i really have spent most of today watching love island, and i just spent the past two hours watching pilot pete make horrible decisions, so my brain is officially mush. that said i am going to do my best to make this coherent. to start, a bit about me, i am a taurus. i like trash tv. i’m really craving chicken fingers. i have never met a plate of nachos i didn’t like, and if i could be anything other than a human person i’d be a cloud i think. alright onto the good stuff. 

BIO. *has my feelings surgically removed*

first of all here is her pinterest board (keep in mind marni was kind of the skully inspired muse in a scooby doo rp so that’s why stuff looks a bit spooky)

marni was brought into the world into a weird situation by anyone’s standards, but especially by hers. to start, both her parents were hippies. yes, weed smoking, chakra cleansing, organic grown kale that they got from the farmer’s market where the only store clerk walked around with her tits proudly out, hippies. but they weren’t just any hippies, they were rich hippies. and that somehow made it worse. 

clint ‘storm’ vanross and clementine vanross were the proud owners and entrepreneurs of a whole food organic grocery store (think whole foods or trader joe’s), and clemetine later went on to ride the success of their company to create her own website and brand (think goop basically. yes, marni’s mother has sold a candle that smells like her vagina, and yes marni is deeply ashamed of it). both businesses were wildly successful, and so clem and storm quickly went from living and travelling the world in their van to having about six mansions across the world. marni came into their life as their first child around the time they bought mansion two. she was born with a silver spoon in her mouth, but that spoon’s handle was made of moon quartz and the silver was organically sourced. 

from there on out marni was raised in a weird way. you’d think because hippies were all about free love, that marni would be raised with an abundance of it but that wasn’t exactly the case. her parents were all about giving marni her aunotomy fairly early in life, which sounds good, but really means that marni was simply treated as an adult from the moment she could walk by herself. and she was the adult really. after all, marni was the one who had to convince her parents to enroll her in school (they were determined to let the world be her teacher, and marni simply wasn’t having any of it), the one who had to fix her own meals when all that was left in their fridge was raw tofu, the one who had to clean up her mother’s vomit whenever she went a bit to hard on the moonshine. yes, marni had parents, but she also had forty-something year old children in boho chic attire.

and marni’s parents never understood it. after all, with the way they were they could never understand how their genetics combined to make such a serious girl. one who would look at the moon and not just admire it, but ask how it stayed up there in the first place. how far away was it? how could she get there? and when told to simply enjoy and love it for what it was, would instead march herself to the library and find out the answers herself. marni’s parents and her truly never saw eye to eye, and at a certain point marni stopped trying to. she wasn’t expecting her parents to follow suit, but follow suit they did. marni’s parents gave up on trying to understand her her around the time she was nine. that’s when she moved to halloway, or rather, that’s when they moved her to halloway. 

they said it was because of business. the fact was, marni’s parents had been marching her around the world, from state to state and country to country whenver they wanted to start up a new store or run down a new story. yes, sometimes they would leave her (alone, in an empty house, with only the occasional eccentric ‘aunt’ or ‘uncle’ to come by and make sure marni wasn’t dead) for a while for short business trips (the longest being about two weeks) but they always came back eventually. but this was different. her parents set her up in halloway with a nanny named paola, and then they left for the foreseeable future. her mother, to go down to africa to chase a story. her father, to go down to europe and expand the business. they both promised to be back within a month, and they were. but then they left again. and again. and again. 

but it was fine. marni and paola got along great. she learned very quickly how to forge her parents signature on school forms. she didn’t need them. she didn’t miss them. but she did desperately want them to want her, and it took marni a long time to realize they just didn’t. 

marni was the new girl for a while. she struggled a bit to make friends as the little girl who got more excited by science experiments than barbies. the one who was always the first to raise her hand in class, and the one with the famous parents. most of the kids didn’t know who the vanross’ were but the parents did. and having the occassion adult come up to marni and tell her how they just loved her mother’s zuchini bread recipe, or the all organic popcorn they sold at her father’s store was just... weird. and other kids found it weird too. marni struggled for a while, and was picked on quite a lot but what was she to do other than accept it? all that marni had in her arsenal were facts and scathing words, and mean kids didn’t usually tend to let those stop them. 

eventually marni grew up. she went to high school. skipped prom. remained fairly anonymous other than becoming president of the chemistry club, valedictorian and being known as the girl known for making friends with her teachers. she got accepted to harvard and yale for university, but not knowing if it was because of her own accomplishments (which were countless) or because of her parents, she refused them both and decided to stay in halloway. to go to university here. to try and make her own way. 

honestly in university marni’s life was similarly uneventful because for the most part she was the quiet type that went to class, went home, and back. she didn’t cause any stir unless you could hear the occasional scathing comment murmured under her breath, or you were a neighbour who marni was screaming at to keep it down. she didn’t even attend a single party unless coerced. she was nobody, and honestly that was how marni liked it. she had never been one for the spotlight. she genuinely preferred to be more behind the scenes, unless there was a need to rise to the occasion. 

and then all of this happened y’all. it really went to shit huh. marni is terrified honestly and she just wants to know what’s going on. a lot of people who barely know who she is have probably seen her speaking up and asking questions and getting almost frenzied in her attempt to find the truth because the mystery of all this is driving her insane. no she doesn’t miss her parents particularly, but she does miss what the world used to be and she wants to go back to that, desperately, but she also really just wants to know. like if marni understood what was happening here or even just played a part in future generations understanding, and she was literally still never able to get back... honestly she could still die pretty happy i’m ngl.

PERSONALITY. *eyes snap open at 3:52am* nobody likes me

blunt. painfully painfully blunt, god. if marni thinks you’re an idiot she will tell you to your face, she really does not care and that absolutely will get her into trouble one day

painfully curious! wants to know what’s happening with this whole situation, god desperately wants to know the truth and mechanics behind it. 

cold honestly?? like marni doesn’t know how to comfort people really, she was never really taught how. she isn’t very compassionate, she’s genuinely more on the logical side. will give you the most rational answer even if it does sound kinda of cruel

the voice of reason! the person in your friend group who is the designated driver. also the person in your friend group who would say ‘i told you so’

an overachiever. lives for academic acknowledgement, like those little gold stars on your papers in elementary school are what kept marni going man. huge ass nerd. huge ass bookwarm. 

super stubborn. refuses to even entertain the idea of anything magical happening here, and is honestly kind of judgmental of people who think that way because of her parents like marni has very little respect for any hippies i’m not gonna lie 

skeptical as hell but we been knew 

a know it all! think she’s right about everything !! she usually is but still !!

does not know what to do with emotion. has had a couple, and does not recommend it. would rather die than admit to a feeling. 

trust issues galore! does not trust literally anyone ever. if marni trusts you than you’re truly special

HEADCANNONS. it takes me 3-7 business days to process my feelings

has never learnt to ride a bike cause her parents never taught her rip

loves the smell of books

laughs at horror movies generally. the kind of person who is really hard to scare. 

was raised a vegan but loves eating meat. stress eats meat when she’s truly like anxious, and so is really bummed about the dwindling meat supply for more reasons than one. 

needs coffee to survive, so the rationing has got her going a bit crazy even though she knows it’s necessary. 

has never really gotten truly drunk. 

keeps a detailed journal about all of her thoughts about all of this and takes meticulous notes. 

is left handed. 

can shoot a gun and does have one on her person pretty much at all times. i headcannon that her nanny paola taught her to shoot, and marni isn’t strong at all but she’s a pretty good shot. it’s the only way she has to defend herself honestly. 

is redheaded/strawberry blonde zoey and redheaded/strawberry blonde zoey ONLY

bi as hell!

WANTED CONNECTIONS. baby’s first words are ‘i’m not here to make friends’

i really am too lazy to make a whole ass sexy list rn and i apologize sjsdjjdf but !!! best friends, friends, confidantes, someone who used to drag her to parties, someone who used to pick on her, someone who used to defend her, flings, exes (marni is a horrible gf and she probably DIPPED the moment she started to feel something so give it to me folks), crushes she used to have in high school or middle school or elementary school, people who had crushes on her in high school or middle school or elementary school, current crushes on either end, enemy (just someone she butts heads with man!), old academic rivals, partner in crime in trying to figure this shit out, someone who hates her man, sibling like relationship, a girl squad, someone who tries to get her to loosen up, someone who is really chill and okay with the current situation who marni just wants to strangle with her bare hands!!! and anything else your heart desires okay, thank you for listening to me ramble ilu already. 

[angrylizardjacket]

act your age: [4] Freeze Your Brain

Chapter Summary: Ash doesn’t go to school the Monday after the fight, and so John comes to check up on her. 

Word Count: 1943 | [act your age masterpost]

the heathers: @brian-may-brian-may @marvelismylifffe @whoschantel​ @peteyparkersbabyy @cosmicsskies @somefanfic-to-love @happy-at-home @youngpastafanmug

[message me to be added xx]

Ash doesn’t go to school on Monday, still nursing considerable bruises on both her face and ego. Oscar doesn’t say anything, lets her keep to herself for most of the rest of the weekend, and leaves instructions for her to make pasta when he goes to study with Freddie on Monday night.

“Dad?” Oscar calls to his father’s study where he knows the man is sitting, probably smoking and drinking, maybe reading or writing. After a day of teaching at the local university, he always claimed to need space and time to himself, though it was the same on weekends too. He didn’t know how to take care of children back when he was still married, and he certainly doesn’t know now. Maybe Oscar would be resentful if he hadn’t had Ash to rely on. 

“Boy,” their father responds flatly, barely an acknowledgement. Oscar’s pretty sure the man doesn’t even know his name anymore. 

“I’m going out; I’ve left instructions for dinner with Ash and there should be enough for you if you want some.”

“Good that.” 

Since his divorce, the only thing he’d been interested in was his work; maybe Oscar and Ash looked too much like their mother, but the man was never able to admit than, was barely able to speak more than two sentences to them. It had been a shock to him that Oscar had wanted to come with him to England at all, and Ash goes where Oscar goes, so he’d been stuck with two kids who he’d quietly hoped would stay in Scotland. Not that he’d ever say that out loud.

Ash is halfway through cooking the pasta when there comes a knock at the door, which she hadn’t expected.

“Dad, is anyone coming over tonight?” She calls, leaving the pasta boiling away for the moment.

Back in Scotland, he’d have colleagues over to for drinks on occasion, squirreling themselves away in his expensive study that Ash was never allowed in. Though it had been almost six months, for the barest moment she felt a tingle of anticipation as she once had, looking forward to being able to see August, one of her father’s colleagues who’d always doted upon her. Though he’d gone cold on her in the few months prior to her moving, part of her still misses seeing him, even if he and Oscar never got along. 

So it comes as a surprise, after her father had told her that he wasn’t expecting anyone, and Ash asks who it is, to hear a surprisingly familiar voice at the door, apologising.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have dropped in unannounced,” John’s rambling, standing in the doorway, wringing his hands. It’s dark out, almost seven, and he’s wearing a uniform boasting the name of the coffee shop a few blocks away that Oscar had mentioned wanting to check out.

“Everything okay?” Ash’s first instinct is concern, because why would John Deacon be on her doorstep on a Monday night? When he looks at her, she sees that same concern mirrored on his face.

“Oh Christ, Ash are you alright?” He counters with, eyes searching her face, taking in the details of the dark purple bruising around her nose and eyes. 

“I’m fine, John, what are you doing here?” Ash asks, stepping aside and gesturing for him to come in. He’s got his backpack on his shoulder and is fidgeting nervously in her foyer.

“I - the band was worried about you, and you didn’t show up for school.” John tells her, by way of explanation, and Ash frowns at that, walking through to the kitchen to check her dinner. John follows close on her heels, still looking uncomfortable and nervous.

“How would you -” Ash starts, before letting out a sigh, “Roger.” Stirring the pasta, she casts her gaze to where John had sat himself at the kitchen island, his fingers tapping the counter, watching her. “You guys don’t need to worry, honestly, I’m fine. How did you find my house?”

“I asked Oscar - actually, I messaged you, but you didn’t respond.” He paused, “again, really sorry, it’s just I was - Roger was concerned.” He conceded, and Ash made a derisive noise under her breath.

“Why didn’t he come over then?”

John makes an amused noise at that, and okay, they both know it might kill Roger to admit that he genuinely cares about her, so she’ll stop asking John why he’s here, and just accept that he is.

“Did you hear he got in?” John asks, tone turning bright, and Ash snorted, nodding.

“Got a message at lunch, but he didn’t tell me what he got,” she explained, tapping the water from her fork before she put a lid on the pasta and left it to simmer, “alright Deaks, fill me in, what’s the cast look like?”

“Chaotic,” John said with a conspiratorial smile, “Rog and that kid Joe-”

“John, he’s older than you,” Ash laughed a little, leaning on the kitchen island across from him, before a thought occurred to her, “hey, did you want dinner?”

“You don’t need to-”

“It’s no trouble, I’m cooking enough for a family, it’s not like me and dad could eat it all ourselves,” she laughed, “it’s not much, just some cheesy pasta, but you’re welcome to if you want.”

“I should text my mum then, if you’re sure it’s not too much trouble,” John hesitates, and she assures him that it’s not.

Over dinner he explains that Gizelle would be playing the lead, and that Roger and Joe would be playing the two jocks, which amused Ash endlessly.

“Christ, Ashley, what happened to you? Who is this?” When her father comes out to collect his dinner, Ash’s mood sobers considerably from where she’d been laughing loud enough for it to echo through the house. John frowns a little, watching her gaze drop to her bowl.

“Nothing, dad, I tripped going down the stairs at school today is all,” she lied easily, playing with her food, “this is John, he’s in that band that Oz is fond of, we go to school together, he was making sure I was okay.”

"Told the boy that school is shit; you would have been better off back home.” He serves himself pasta and absconds back to his study, leaving only an uncomfortable silence in his wake.

“Is this the first time he’s seen you since-”

Ash shushes John loudly, looking awkward and uncomfortable, like she doesn’t want to talk about it, and with her father gone, she stuffs her mouth full of pasta to avoid talking, if only for a moment. 

“Sorry, what were you saying about, about the play?” She asks, abruptly changing the subject, and she looks him in the eyes, refuses to look away, as if daring him to ask about what just went down. He doesn’t.

“I’m doing sound for it,” John says quietly, visibly uncomfortable, but Ash brightens, perhaps to overcompensate for her own discomfort.

“Really? I thought you weren’t interested in being a part of it?”

“I mean, I think I am,” John shifted, though he was beginning to perk up, “the guidance councilor saw me looking at it, and I guess she thought I was, I don’t know, staring wistfully, longingly,” John laughed a little at that, though Ash too was amused by his phrasing, “and she must have said something to that TA, Gwilym, because the next thing I know he’s hunted me down in the engineering room while I’m trying to enjoy my lunch, and he’s telling me that there’s ‘always room for crew’.” 

“And you just said yes?”

“I mean,” John avoided her gaze, though he couldn’t avoid smiling, “it means I get to spend more time with Geeg.” And he sounds so honestly fond that Ash doesn’t quite know what to say. Faced with her silent confusion, John starts turning pink, “we work together. We’re friends.” He explains quickly. He is fully aware that she doesn’t seem like the kind of person he’d hang out with, in fact, none of the people he considers close friends seem like his sort of people.

“Well she seems lovely,” Ash finally says, smiling, and John lets out a breath he hadn’t know he’d been holding. “Brimming with talent too, by God.”

“She’s, uh,” John’s still a little pink around the ears, “she’s sort of like my Roger, if you get my meaning.”

“I mean I don’t- oh.” Ash goes wide eyed, and immediately feels her face heating up, because only John Deacon would call her out on her crush in such a roundabout yet obvious way.

John’s watching her, trying to gauge her reaction. He’d been honest with her, even a little vulnerable, and while Ash and Roger were both about as stubborn as a mule regarding their feelings, she wouldn’t deny it. If nothing else, John was almost terrifyingly perceptive.

“She’s lovely,” Ash smiles gently, and John nods, grinning.

“I’ve never told anyone that before,” he murmured quietly, almost to himself, sounding a little pleased, and Ash felt her heart grow warm at his words, the trust he’d put in her.

“Your secret is safe with me.” She gave him a fond smile, reaching out for his now empty plate.

“They’re looking for people for set and costume, if you wanted to be a part of it,” John offers, following her through to the kitchen. Ash hums, rinsing the dishes and putting them in the dish washer.

“It’s like a virus; they’ve infected you, Deaks, you’re just looking for the next person to infect, to drag back to their musical theater lair,” Ash grins at him, and when John tries to protest, Ash waves him off, “I’m kidding, I’m kidding.”

“I dunno, you’re artistic and stuff, right? I just thought...” He shrugged, and at that, Ash did actually consider. 

“Dunno, Deaks, I’ll think about it.”

“You get to watch Roger act like a fool and sing that song about balls-”

“That’s one of his songs?” Ash spluttered, incredulous. “I’m in, fucking sold.” Her eyes were alight with mirth. 

John doesn’t stay long after that; his mother comes to pick him up, takes the time to come in and thank Ash for her hospitality. She asks if there’s a parent around, and Ash smiles easily, telling the woman that her father was in his study. With that, his mother thanks Ash again, and John grins, tells her he’ll see her around.

“Doesn’t your friend Gizelle live around here?” Ash hears his mother say as they’re walking down the driveway.

“Yeah, she’s just around the corner.” John confirms. 

Huh.

[congrats on getting to sing about ur balls.] Ash sends Roger once she closes the door, and moves into the kitchen, fully intending to put the leftover pasta into tupperware, but her phone goes off before she can even open the cupboard.

[🍆😂] Roger sends back almost immediately, followed by [who told you].

[deaks. im fine btw.] And she’s worried for a second that it sounds passive agressive, or malicious, before her phone buzzes again.

[what a traitor 😂 i wanted to tell you myself] followed by a surprisingly sincere [and im glad] and then [😊💙] and she can’t begin to fathom what that means, just focusing on the fact that he does care about her, that he wanted to tell her about being in the musical, and that thought alone has her grinning like a fool. 

She’s still smiling about it when Oscar comes home, and though she won’t tell him why, because he’s firmly in the camp of ‘just tell him already’, he’s seems to be just happy that she’s happy again.